My HONEST thoughts on marriage

[LegendKiller]

As others have said, OP is shallow and selfish. Naturally his attitude attracts like-minded people. He then searches for the prettiest of those, who will often be the most shallow and selfish also. He then complains he can't find love, or doesn't know what it is.

Perhaps you should let go of your pre-conceived notions, selfishness, and shallowness, and find somebody a bit deeper than Paris Hilton.

I have been with my wife for almost 9 years. We started dating when she was 18 and I was 19. We went through undergraduate, graduate, the CFA, and more than a few jobs. We have moved from MN, to South FL, central FL, Northern VA, and now NYC. She has supported me through my education and jobs. I have supported her through her education, family challenges, and cancer. We have only been married for about a year and 4 months, but I couldn't imagine not having her be my wife.

Some day you might realize that it's not about the hot chick. It's about the one that'll be there when you need them the most, bonus is she's hot too. If you don't need that, then more power to you. However, it'll get awefully lonely when you're 70 and some dumb bimbo is out spending your money, screwing the young pool boy, and caring little about you except for the minute you die so she can have your money.

Good luck with that.

 

[Tiamat]

Some men are destined to be bachelors. You seem to be one of them. There isn't anything wrong with that either.

 

[Ryan]

Originally posted by: FoBoT
cliffs:

i am shallow and selfish

I couldn't have summed it up better....

 

[Riverhound777]

Not to defend the Op, but for those saying he'll get older too, that doesn't really matter. For women, yes it matters, older women(45+) have a much harder time getting young men than a man of the same age getting a young women. Women don't care as much about looks and age as men do, that is a fact. Sure money and power help, but if you know how to attract women, you can be poor and old and still get hot young women when you are 50+.

To the Op: if you are 40, banging 19 year olds and are happy, good for you.

 

[jcuadrado]

that's why they invented strip clubs...

for the married guys...

 

[iRONic]

Rock on with yer bad self, OP. At least you're honest about the situation.

 

[buck]

Originally posted by: Greenman
When you grow up it will all make sense.

:thumbsup:

 

[Fike]

when you marry someone you are attracted to, you are "getting in on the ground floor," so to speak. You will age, she will age, sex will still be great, everything will be okay.

 

[Lola]

I did not see anywhere... did the OP state his age anywhere? i am just curious....

 

[Mo0o]

I've been dating my current girlfriend for 4 years now and being able to connect with her on a mental level and just enjoying her company has been one of the single most rewarding things of my life. i guess it's still not marriage for 20+ years but still a long time and it's definitely not only a physical attraction

 

[jlbenedict]

Originally posted by: LolaWiz
I did not see anywhere... did the OP state his age anywhere? i am just curious....

I'm willing to guess younger than 26

 

[Pacemaker]

Originally posted by: FoBoT
cliffs:

i am shallow and selfish

Although in a way unselfish as he won't subject the person and (theoretical) kids to a divorce when he's tired of her.

 

[ColdFusion718]

Marriage isn't for everyone.

 

[Feneant2]

If the woman you marry is not a 9-10 to your eyes (regardless of looks) well then you are not with the right woman.

After you've been with someone long enough to truly understand them and love them, looks don't matter at all.

 

[ISAslot]

"... love's not times fool, though rosy lips and cheeks, within his bending sickles compass come, love alters not in his brief hours and weeks but bears it out even to the edge of doom..."

 

[sixone]

You're the guy who "trained" your GF to be "almost as nice as a human being", but apparently you date her because her being smoking hot is the most important thing to you.

Please don't breed until you grow out of it. Your children need to know that being good-looking is not the focus of their lives.

 

[chimmytime]

When you finally fall in love, everything gets thrown out the window. Wait till then to make a decision.

 

[rh71]

Originally posted by: Greenman
When you grow up it will all make sense.

Originally posted by: Aikouka
To me, it sounds like you have never actually loved someone... because if you did, you'd transcend over this idea of looks being important over time.

Most fitting responses, I think.

 

[sao123]

please move to a country which still supports polygamie...

every couple of years just add a new chick...

Disclaimer: just remember you have to pay for all the old chicks while adding new ones.

 

[StageLeft]

But she will get older and then I will no longer be attracted to her. I've never met a woman over 35 that I have the slightest bit of attraction for.

You're young. I know I was told this when I was younger, but it's true, as you get older you WILL find older people more attractive. I see a 35 year old now who would have probably sickened me when I was 18. I still appreciate younger women's looks too, of course

The big problem with wives is not finding a hot one but finding one who won't break apart at the seams like a stuffed sack after she craps out of a couple of kids. That's really the main thing to look for, staying power. Most women (and men, to be fair) don't have that, so married couples go down a rude of total ugliness and it's wildly exageratted once they have kids. They just give up. In our case the Skoorbs are a tiny bit thinner and fitter and leaner than when we met, so we are just awesome! I am a big time DILF, it's the truth.

 

[eleison]

I had sex with a 20 year old once.. it was cool

while older men will still be attracted to younger women. Its just that they will stop lusting after them. Its just how men age.

During late teens earlier 20's its all about the boobs/poontang/etc.. basically hot body and a killer face (lips... mouth.. booty..) etc.. for a young guy..


But as they get older, they aren't at their sexual peak anymore... sex is not AS important. To a certain extent presonality does come into play. Yea, having sex with a nubile coed is nice, but for most older men.. its gets boring after a while. I think older men want something a little bit more its inevitable as in getting gray hairs..

The op is not at that stage yet, imho... he'll get there though.. everyone does, it seems.. sex after a while gets boring...

I'm 31... sometimes i get lazy and not care about young women. I'm sure a lot of men my age feel the same way... having sex with a hot girl for a weekend or traveling to a new country... now a days... I'm more inclined to pick new country....

 

[silverpig]

Originally posted by: eleison
I had sex with a 20 year old once.. it was cool

while older men will still be attracted to younger women. Its just that they will stop lusting after them. Its just how men age.

During late teens earlier 20's its all about the boobs/poontang/etc.. basically hot body and a killer face (lips... mouth.. booty..) etc.. for a young guy..


But as they get older, they aren't at their sexual peak anymore... sex is not AS important. To a certain extent presonality does come into play. Yea, having sex with a nubile coed is nice, but for most older men.. its gets boring after a while. I think older men want something a little bit more its inevitable as in getting gray hairs..

The op is not at that stage yet, imho... he'll get there though.. everyone does, it seems.. sex after a while gets boring...

I'm 31... sometimes i get lazy and not care about young women. I'm sure a lot of men my age feel the same way... having sex with a hot girl for a weekend or traveling to a new country... now a days... I'm more inclined to pick new country....

A woman's sexual peak is late 20s early 30s... they get that baby on their mind and all they want is sex.

 

[iRONic]

Originally posted by: Skoorb
The big problem with wives is not finding a hot one but finding one who won't break apart at the seams like a stuffed sack after she craps out of a couple of kids.

Wow... My children were born differently than yours.

 

[Fritzo]

Cliffs: I will die old and alone because of a personality flaw.

 

[Zenmervolt]

Originally posted by: Alphathree33
I *DO* want the family experience. I want to be settled and have kids and be married and have all of those things. But I also KNOW for a fact that I am never *fully* satisfied unless I have a hot young woman in my life.

Then you aren't ready, pure and simple.

Until you can find fulfillment as a single man, you will not be able to find it in a relationship. You can find some anaesthetic value to a relationship that will temporarily make you forget that you are not fulfilled, but you cannot find fulfillment in another. Until you are at peace with the idea of being alone, you cannot find peace by being with another.

To depend upon an external condition for satisfaction in life ultimately is destructive. Sooner or later it is found to be lacking and you will move on to the next external thing in a constant search for true fulfillment. That is what seems to be happening to you right now; you jump from girl to girl to mask the void that you feel in your own life.

Take some time away from dating, examine yourself and find your fears and the areas where you are unfulfilled. Make peace with yourself and learn to be happy alone. Then you will be able to fully appreciate another.

ZV