My wife just asked if I wanted to join....

[nick1985]

Originally posted by: her209
PICS?

 

[theNEOone]

It does seem like your wife is getting bored, but of course that is totally natural after 12 years. It's a miracle it's been ok that long!!! If you think about it, I'm sure you're somewhat bored also. Not in the sense that you don't get excited, but after 12 years of sex you both know what to expect. I'm no expert (only 20, but I've been w/ my gf for 5 years) but there's a great sense of excitement when uncertainty comes into play. Anyway, your wife probably just wants some hightened excitement. Like somebody else suggested, try new things. You seem pretty shocked that your wife suggested something like this, and I'm sure she knew what your reaction would be before she even told you. I'd be worried that she desires change a little more than she's expressing openly. Rather than just saying "Nah," how about you be less candid and talk more on the subject. Suggest things the both of you can do. If it turns out that she's really bent on this (but you don't want to) suggest the idea of a sex party. It has many aspects of a swinger's club minus the explicit expectation that you WILL be having sex w/ other people. This avoids your apprehensions of taking the "thought of being where someone else has been" but at the same time satisfies your wifes appetite. My g/f hit me with a similar punch and I was blown away at first. Just be a little open, and you might find that it benefits you just as much as her.

 

[MichaelD]

Originally posted by: Skoorb

Originally posted by: MichaelD
Why am I always the one to wake everyone up? *sigh* I do what I gotta do.

If your wife was serious, then your marriage is over. Swinger's Clubs are spouse-swapping clubs. Some guy comes to your house and picks your wife up and they go out on a date and then they do the deed...in all the positions you never thought of.

Conversely, you go to his house and do his wife. Either your wife will fall in lust (love?) with some other guy or you will with some other woman...that's the only possible outcome.

I'd consult a divorce lawyer, PRIVATELY, w/o her knowledge....SOON. Why? You can bet your ass she already has.

Yeah, but alternatively it could be a thing where you show up at some party and have a big orgy. Seems less of a problem to the marriage then.

But really, compudog, are you serious or pulling our legs? Let us know what she says.

Pics

Yeah, I know about the orgy-thing. But what eventually happens is that out of all those guys and gals you've both boinked, one stand out...one was really good and roxored your boxor...then you start seeing them on the side, exclusively, etc....marriage is over...

 

[NogginBoink]

Originally posted by: compudog
Naturally I expect humorous responses. But I was really just interested in what the ATOT community thought. I think our marriage is in decent shape. We have two kids (one five year old son and one three year old daughter.) We certainly have our share of probs (mostly money) but our relationship isn't bad. Why would she even ask? Does she want to "spice it up?" Who knows?

These are questions for you to ask her.

Contrary to what others have said, there are many, many happy relationships where the couple is involved in a swingers club. Else these clubs wouldn't exist. These clubs, from what I understand, are not just about wild orgies and sex with everyone there. If the subject intruiges you, visit one of the clubs with your wife and the understanding that nothing is going to happen and you're just going to check it out. Like any community, the people there will be happy to talk to you and show you what they're all about.

 

[HamSupLo]

i thought a swinger's club was where couples get together for an orgy. oh wells, carry on....

 

[blackhawk]

Its either a 'trick' question to see what your reaction is, like a test, or, if she's serious, the beginning of the end unless swinging is something you want.

Try to find out what it is, gotta listen lots to try to figure out the answer.

 

[TheGameIs21]

I can't believe all you heartless thugs asking for pics.... THIS MAN IS IN TURMOIL!!! Just ask Koing.....

 

[Red Dawn]

Originally posted by: NogginBoink

Originally posted by: compudog
Naturally I expect humorous responses. But I was really just interested in what the ATOT community thought. I think our marriage is in decent shape. We have two kids (one five year old son and one three year old daughter.) We certainly have our share of probs (mostly money) but our relationship isn't bad. Why would she even ask? Does she want to "spice it up?" Who knows?

These are questions for you to ask her.

Contrary to what others have said, there are many, many happy relationships where the couple is involved in a swingers club. Else these clubs wouldn't exist. These clubs, from what I understand, are not just about wild orgies and sex with everyone there. If the subject intruiges you, visit one of the clubs with your wife and the understanding that nothing is going to happen and you're just going to check it out. Like any community, the people there will be happy to talk to you and show you what they're all about.

They'd also be very happy to put the screws to your wife!

 

[her209]

You've been married 12 years and you don't have PICS?

 

[NogginBoink]

Originally posted by: MichaelD
Why am I always the one to wake everyone up? *sigh* I do what I gotta do.

If your wife was serious, then your marriage is over. Swinger's Clubs are spouse-swapping clubs. Some guy comes to your house and picks your wife up and they go out on a date and then they do the deed...in all the positions you never thought of.

Do you have any clue what you're talking about? Which end of your body did those words come out of? Have you ever been to a swingers club meeting?

Please, let us know your credentials and expertise on swingers clubs.

 

[her209]

Originally posted by: NogginBoink

Originally posted by: compudog
Naturally I expect humorous responses. But I was really just interested in what the ATOT community thought. I think our marriage is in decent shape. We have two kids (one five year old son and one three year old daughter.) We certainly have our share of probs (mostly money) but our relationship isn't bad. Why would she even ask? Does she want to "spice it up?" Who knows?

These are questions for you to ask her.

Contrary to what others have said, there are many, many happy relationships where the couple is involved in a swingers club. Else these clubs wouldn't exist. These clubs, from what I understand, are not just about wild orgies and sex with everyone there. If the subject intruiges you, visit one of the clubs with your wife and the understanding that nothing is going to happen and you're just going to check it out. Like any community, the people there will be happy to talk to you and show you what they're all about.

They also be happy to share the STDs with you.

 

[TheGameIs21]

Originally posted by: Red Dawn

Originally posted by: NogginBoink

Originally posted by: compudog
Naturally I expect humorous responses. But I was really just interested in what the ATOT community thought. I think our marriage is in decent shape. We have two kids (one five year old son and one three year old daughter.) We certainly have our share of probs (mostly money) but our relationship isn't bad. Why would she even ask? Does she want to "spice it up?" Who knows?

These are questions for you to ask her.

Contrary to what others have said, there are many, many happy relationships where the couple is involved in a swingers club. Else these clubs wouldn't exist. These clubs, from what I understand, are not just about wild orgies and sex with everyone there. If the subject intruiges you, visit one of the clubs with your wife and the understanding that nothing is going to happen and you're just going to check it out. Like any community, the people there will be happy to talk to you and show you what they're all about.

They'd also be very happy to put the screws to your wife!

LMAO!!!!

 

[anxi80]

Originally posted by: axiom
Van Damn's met Westerfield at a Swinger Party
Take it how you want to. My point is not that Swinger parties are bad and dangerous. My point is that letting strangers into your personal privacy let along your wife's panties is not the risk you want to be taking. Peanut Butter and pancakes, go ahead and take that risk. There are healthy risks and there are dangerous risks. Choose wisely.

not to refute your source, cant view it though, at work, filters and such. but here's my presented proof to what i stated, on the stand, she admittedly "swung once", and it was with 2 other neighbors. i also followed the case very closely as i only live about 15 min. away from the van dam residence. here is my link: kgtv news link - brenda van dam takes the stand

sorry for going off topic here... just straightening out the facts...

 

[StageLeft]

noggin Since you seem to be a member or know somebody who is what goes on at the club you're talking about...? Pics also would be nice.

 

[NogginBoink]

Originally posted by: Red Dawn

Originally posted by: NogginBoink

Originally posted by: compudog
Naturally I expect humorous responses. But I was really just interested in what the ATOT community thought. I think our marriage is in decent shape. We have two kids (one five year old son and one three year old daughter.) We certainly have our share of probs (mostly money) but our relationship isn't bad. Why would she even ask? Does she want to "spice it up?" Who knows?

These are questions for you to ask her.

Contrary to what others have said, there are many, many happy relationships where the couple is involved in a swingers club. Else these clubs wouldn't exist. These clubs, from what I understand, are not just about wild orgies and sex with everyone there. If the subject intruiges you, visit one of the clubs with your wife and the understanding that nothing is going to happen and you're just going to check it out. Like any community, the people there will be happy to talk to you and show you what they're all about.

They'd also be very happy to put the screws to your wife!

From the individuals I know who participate in these activities, it's not as simple as that. Some couples actually do feel that their relationship is strengthened by swinging. It's not all about random wild sex, despite what our fantasies would like us to believe. Swinging clubs are social communities that have been ostracised to a certain extent by mainstream culture. Most of 'em won't let just anyone in, and most of 'em probably DO want newcomers to check the place out before doing something they might regret later, just like any other club that has members join.

I realize that many of you here find swinging immoral and despicable. However, not all people feel that way. For many couples, swinging is a part of their lifestyle and they do enjoy it and they do have happy, healthy marriages.

Compudog, this is by no means a trivial thing, but I don't want the misinformation and judgements that others are spewing here to distort your perception of what these clubs are. I myself haven't been to any but have talked with people who have. If you're not interested, tell your wife. If you are interested, or might be interested, there's really no reason to check it out, IMO.

 

[Staples]

This is kind of off the topic but it is somewhat in this category I think. What the heck is the mile high club? I have heard that term a few times and I am sick of not knowing what the reference is to.

 

[NogginBoink]

Originally posted by: Staples
This is kind of off the topic but it is somewhat in this category I think. What the heck is the mile high club? I have heard that term a few times and I am sick of not knowing what the reference is to.

Making love in an airplane.

 

[TheGameIs21]

Well stated Noggin.

[edit]er... on both of the above entries by you.....[/edit]

 

[deerslayer]

Originally posted by: MichaelD
Why am I always the one to wake everyone up? *sigh* I do what I gotta do.

If your wife was serious, then your marriage is over. Swinger's Clubs are spouse-swapping clubs. Some guy comes to your house and picks your wife up and they go out on a date and then they do the deed...in all the positions you never thought of.

Conversely, you go to his house and do his wife. Either your wife will fall in lust (love?) with some other guy or you will with some other woman...that's the only possible outcome.

I'd consult a divorce lawyer, PRIVATELY, w/o her knowledge....SOON. Why? You can bet your ass she already has.

Exactly

 

[Geekbabe]

That would sure give new meaning to ATOT Swap meet's wouldn't it? Shudder! :Q

 

[her209]

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
That would sure give new meaning to ATOT Swap meet's wouldn't it? Shudder! :Q

Not to mention DOA.

 

[pandapanda]

You could try thinking positively about this. Maybe she is interested in a relationship with another woman but couldn't think of a way to tell you that?

Maybe she was testing you. The only way you will really know is to talk about it. I've been married 12 years also, and we've talked about all KINDS of things. Would you ever do ______________? Have you ever thought about ______________________? What would you do if _______________________? And if you have been having plain boring vanilla type relations for a while, visit www.spencergifts.com they are having a big sale.

 

[roncarter]

yea.. she is getting bored.. better add some spice to your marriage

 

[compudog]

Well we talked about it and she is shocked that I even took it seriously. She knows people that are swingers and, while she is not intersted in becoming one, she don't get the whole swinger thing. She said she said it "tongue in cheek" as a joke, and after all of this time together I believe her. So, she doesn't want to join a swinger's club nor does she want me to even consider it. She did ask if I was thinking about joining though...

AND YES I HAVE PICS, AND NO!!! I'M NOT POSTING ANY...:Q

 

[y2kc]

This is a bad sign.