Need advice on girl at work.

[Hammer]

There's this girl at work named Kathy, and she absolutely gorgeous. I don't mince words either because I am very picky when it comes to girls as my friends now all too well. Anyway, she is also a very nice girl and we do a lot of projects together and talk alot, I guess were friends. A while back she had told me a story about how this guy would always stare and her chest when talking to her and how it mad it had made her. The last two days she has worn some very revealing tops, and when I walk over to her cube and she is sitting down, well you can guess. I like this girl and she is a friend so I am doing my best not to look when I'm talking to her. Problem is that it takes so much concentration not to look that I can't hold a conversion. Anyway, I just wanted to share this, I thought it was amusing.

Btw, no pics. That would cause even more problems.

 

[SCSIfreek]

hammer,

Seriously you need help. Gimme her number and I'll fix it up for you.


--Scsi

 

[Pepsei]

yea it's good to have friends at work...

try not to develope a relationship... it rarely works in workplaces...

makes it even harder when the relationship blows up...

now, pics?

 

[Arschloch]

<< yea it's good to have friends at work...

try not to develope a relationship... it rarely works in workplaces...

makes it even harder when the relationship blows up...

now, pics? >>


While I agree with you that working with an ex could be very difficult, it's my understanding that despite conventional wisdom, most workplace relationships DO turn out well. Or at least, a larger percentage than average.

Unfortunately I don't have any numbers or sources to back it up. But I know I've heard it before, and it convinced me.

 

[richardycc]

yeah same here my advice is DONT DATE CO-WORKER.

rich

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

Lots of people find their spouse at the workplace.

If you do pursue her, do it in a way so that both of you can work together in the future.

 

[Hammer]

The problem though is what do I do about not looking. It takes all my concentration not look, and there nothing left for talking. If I think about anything else, my eyes will snap down. It's a dilemma, so far I have resisted though, so I'm doing ok.

 

[RC5Bri]

Must keep eye contact...argh I know how hard that can be. Don't worry about the conversation, just answer Yep, yeah, uh-huh

 

[Beau]

Just keep thinking "SEXUAL HARRASMENT". If a broad thinks she can make a buck by screaming that, she'll do it.

 

[kami]

HAha, that's pretty funny. I know exactly how you feel.

 

[pyonir]

if the woman is really that gorgeous, just focus on her eyes. if she is so gorgeous i am sure there is something on her face that is just as beautiful as her chest. it shouldn't be that hard, i work with a lot of women that wear....well....revealing tops. but you have to focus on her eyes or something to that effect.

 

[Hammer]

That's basically what I'm reduced to saying "yeah" and "ok" and "uh-huh". Its funny cause the story she told was that this guy from another deptartment would look at her chest while talking to her instead of at her face. This would happen alot, but the guy was not aware of it aparently. Finally, once when he was doing it she held up her middle finger at her chest level, and they guy got the message finally. Never happened again.

I don't want to be that guy

 

[poopaskoopa]

Ya, I know what you're talking about. Once at work I was talking to someone at work, and I was standing up while she was sitting down. She was slightly leaning on the table, looking like they were resting on the table. I felt that my eyes were basically bouncing up and down between her eyes and the table, and I had to get out of there to save myself from further torture/embarrassment .

 

[Ulfwald]

A lot of women "advertise", but it makes them uncomfortable when the "wrong person" reads the ad.

 

[Hammer]

I thought I would post this after reading eakers post about attention and what to show the flip-side.

 

[Koing]

<< if the woman is really that gorgeous, just focus on her eyes. if she is so gorgeous i am sure there is something on her face that is just as beautiful as her chest. it shouldn't be that hard, i work with a lot of women that wear....well....revealing tops. but you have to focus on her eyes or something to that effect. >>



I would definatley have to agree with you there. If this girl that gorgeous you WILL NOT HAVE a problem looking at her face and eyes. Also if your not paying that much attention to her it looks like you are anyway!..j/k...

hamer09 CONTROL YOURSELF MAN!!!!

 

[HRJ77]

It really depends on the situation. I met my wife at work and she was engaged at the time. We have been married for 7 incredible years, but I know of other friends who dated co-workers and it didn't work out and they ended up feeling somewhat uncomfortable with each other. I believe there are two things that you could do that will help guide you in making the right decision.

The first question to ask yourself is whether or not you think the two of you would be good together (as in, "is she possibly the one for me"?). In fact think about it hard and if your not going crazy over her (not just because she wears revealing tops, but because you enjoy her company, you get along very well, and are attracted to her ) then let it go, and make sure that your eyes are always lower than her chest, haha.

Second, (If you are interested in her ) I would recommend you (in a light hearted way, not too serious) talk with her and tell her you enjoy her friendship and let her know that you don't want to be like that other guy, but you're (killing me with those tops you're wearing ) having a hard time with the tops she is wearing. She should appreciate your honesty and:

A. Thank you for sharing that and she will stop wearing the tops

B. Thank you for sharing and keep on wearing them. (Which tells you something. She is interested in you, or likes to be paid attention to by men) If this is the case, do you really want a women like that?

C. Thank you and ask you out. (If you don't want to go out with her, you can tell her you have a rule not to date co-workers no matter how drop dead gorgeous they are)

D. Say you're a pervert and slap you.

A & B & C have the highest likelyhood. D is very unlikely to happen.

I hope this helps, and make sure and let us know what happens.

 

[kulki]

good advice HRJ77
In future this is what I shall do too

 

[Alex]

lol
cmon
just take a peek while shes not lookin at get it outta your system. theres so many times that ya can look at the same boobs and still be mesmerized...

just stare into her eyes... its not that hard...cant be

 

[Hammer]

We have lunch together almost everyday, and we've gone out for drinks in a group after work several times so maybe I'll mention it to her.

 

[Alex]

<< While I agree with you that working with an ex could be very difficult, it's my understanding that despite conventional wisdom, most workplace relationships DO turn out well. Or at least, a larger percentage than average.

Unfortunately I don't have any numbers or sources to back it up. But I know I've heard it before, and it convinced me. >>



second that!

 

[TheBlondOne]

I've always wondered how difficult it must be for guys to keep eye contact PERIOD, let alone when the chick's wearing a revealing top. I've always noticed how well my guy friends and male profs do with that. It's like I can almost hear them saying to themselves, "Look her in the eye. LOOK HER IN THE EYE."

I try not to wear revealing stuff because of that. I don't want to stress some poor guy out!

Anyway, congrats on being a good guy and trying not to "sneak a peak."

--Sarah

 

[MichaelD]

<< A lot of women "advertise", but it makes them uncomfortable when the "wrong person" reads the ad. >>



Oh, yeah buddy! Is that ever the TRUTH! :| I just laugh when some woman in a miniskirt (looks like a belt) and a blouse with the top four buttons undone screams "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU LOOKING AT?" Sometimes I say, "Well, your t!ts and your @ss mostly, but I really like your shoes." It goes over soooooooo well.

If you don't want the attention, don't dress that way!

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

THEBLONDEONE

please don't worry about stressing some poor guy out... its not fair to make the rest of us suffer just b/c 'one guy' might not be able to handle it.

 

[pyonir]

<< THEBLONDEONE

please don't worry about stressing some poor guy out... its not fair to make the rest of us suffer just b/c 'one guy' might not be able to handle it. >>


i was going to go there, but i don't know TheBlondOne at all...so i didn't want to offend.