Need Help. Way Too Stressed.

[Windogg]

Ok guy and gals, getting serious here for a second. I am way stressed and I think it is seriously affecting my health. I am having trouble sleeping at night. I looked back on my post times and see some 4 and 5AM posts on days where I need to wake up at 7AM to get to work. Even after logging off I tend to just lie awake until the sun comes up and I see the minutes on my clock radio tick by.

Not only that but my skin has broken out really bad. It is really dry, itchy, and red like an allergic reaction. It pretty scary to see it flake off without any provocation. I've been to a dermatoligist and nothing seems to help.

My digestive system seems to be constantly in knots. My appetite has gone to hell lately. Seems coffee is the only thing my stomach can tolerate.

Right now I am sitting in a corner in a unused conference room on my laptop. Need some help here folks. Advice?

 

[visgf]

Look at all the things in your life that may be causing you stress and try to think of a new way to think about it. It sounds like it's too simple, but stress is created by you and how you perceive events in your life. If you decide that something isn't going to bother you anymore, don't let it. Sometimes it's a matter of realizing that some things are beyond your control, and so trying to control it is a waste of your time.

 

[Fandu]

Get out and do some exercise. Even as much as walking to work in the morning, or taking an hour after work and go walking, rollerblading, biking, etc. If you want to get a little more serious, take up a sport, join a club or something. It'll help relieve stress, take your mind off things, help ya sleep, etc.

 

[huanaku]

I understand the stressed part ... a couple years ago I started throwing-up blood (from stress ... ??) and now need to have a stomach surgery in a couple weeks. I've had to make myself learn how to "un-stress" ...

 

[Mister T]

light up a J and relax mon (just got back from Jamaica.. hehe)

ok, serious now,
You work out at all? Working out will help you sleep better.
Try to eat soup. Only drinking coffee is not a terribly good idea.

Also, try to normalize when you go to bed and wake up in the morning
and get your body on a sleeping schedule.

 

[bigbootydaddy]

second vote for exercise

 

[BoberFett]

When's the last time you took a vacation? And I mean a real one, not taking a day off so you can get things done at home.

Have you considered finding another job? From the tone of your rants, it sounds like you could use one.

Also, you may want to seek professional medical help. If your stress is to the point where it's affecting your physically, you may need it. I'm not going to go into detail here, but if you want to talk, PM or e-mail me and I'll relate a bit of my story. I've been where you are.

 

[Don Vito Corleone]

Exercise will help. Also, melatonin is a non-addictive, medically benign way to get your sleep back into a more normal pattern.

 

[cipher00]

Agree with most of the rest above, esp. exercise and a good vacation as well as a quick jaunt to the MD. Also, food is your body's fuel; coffee is great but you cannot run on that. Just a fact. Especially when we leave college and head out into the working world, our bodies lose that life-essential ability to survive on college fare. (Thinking back to my BA days, I'm surprised I didn't get scurvy. But if I tried to live now like I did back then I'd be dead in 6 months.)

Think hard, and everybody's different, but most people I know have only gotten as stressed and you seem to be over a job. Other things can cause stress but are often short-lived or in connection with the job thing.

 

[wyvrn]

Exercise is the best way to reduce stress. That and taking a vacation. Going to Hawaii last summer did it for me, came back cool as a cucumber. I think I need to go back this year too

I do tech support as well, and after over 3 years, it is time to get out. This has got to be the highest stress job one can have. Good luck to ya

 

[kranky]

Windogg, stress is bad for your health, as you no doubt know. While I greatly enjoy your rants, you must take steps to lower your stress level.

1. Exercise.
2. Watch your diet.
3. Learn some coping mechanisms for work-related stress.

Is all the stress work-related? What is it about the work that causes the stress - too much to do? too rushed? constant interruptions? boss is unhappy?

 

[DannyLove]

wow, this doesnt sound good. I also have sleep disorders and problems with my digestive sys but wow, you really got it bad. I think everyone so far has inputted lots of good advise. EAT, EXERCISE, and when you have free time, SLEEP, REST, NAP, anything that will relax you. I need sleep.

 

[urameatball]

well, whenever I'm stressed/upset, I just goto sleep. but since you couldn't even sleep, that solution maybe a problem.

when it becomes this serious, you really have to find something you like doing... something amusing, something fun, then go ahead and do it. Different people have different ways of relieving their stress. my hobby is playing with and racing R/C Cars, so everytime I'm feeling a little down, taking the R/C out to a LARGE empty parkinglot with my friends and watching a bunch of miniature cars that weigh 3lb roaring past you at 50mph is a real thrill and lets me forget about everything else. But then, spending over $1000 on my r/c kinda stresses me out.

and another thing. exercise cures EVERYTHING!

 

[Zenmervolt]

I agree with all those who are suggesting exercise. May I suggest Tennis? I'm generally terrible at any sport, but I'm fairly respectable Tennis, so anyone should be able to do decently at it, and it is pretty easy to learn. About this time of year there should be leagues forming and you could get into one of those. That way you'd not only be getting exercise, but you would also have a new group of people to interact with about things other than work. If coffee is all you can handle, be thankful. Coffee is terribly hard on the digestive tract, very acidic and very good at causing heartburn. If you can take coffee, there's got to be other things that won't upset your system. I'll also suggest seeing someone with a MD or PhD. If the stress is so bad that it's affecting you physically then you'll want to have things looked at. I'd say to try to avoid medication for the stress, it should be something with which you can deal alone. In my experience with my grandfather after my grandmother died, all drugs do is mask the underlying problem without being of any real help, and often the person on the drugs complains of not feeling like themselves. Good luck, I'm sure that I speak for most everyone here when I say that I wish you the best.

Zenmervolt

 

[Total Refected Power]

Stress management is key. Get your blood-pressure checked. I was having bad headaches and found that it was up due to stress. If the job is killing you and you can't change your behavior than you need to pursue a less-stressful situation.

You could even be depressed and not realize it.

 

[DannyLove]

Zenmervolt: if you like tennis, maybe you'll like my game in my sig or click here,

 

[Azraele]

Windogg: First of all, coffee is hard on the stomach. Try drinking something milder. When you do eat, make sure it is a well-balanced meal, no junk food for a while. Exercise. That will help your body deal with some of that stress. Relax. Make a nightly ritual of relaxing. I posted a relaxation technique in another thread. I will find you the link. Take a hot bath/shower. Those tend to help relax you. Plan a vacation if at all possible. There's nothing like a vacation to help relax a person. Talk about problems with friends/family. Talking helps. Find some humor in life. Laughter is the best medicine.

<Edit> Here's the link to the relaxation technique.
Here

 

[Cable God]

Windogg, YHPM buddy

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

Sounds like you lack of sleep is adding another stressor in your life.

------

Stop ingesting caffine after 2 pm.

Stay off the computer past midnight.

Make yourself go to bed and lay down at 11 pm. Read a book if you can't sleep.

------

good luck and keep us posted

 

[HuntnPeck]

You might need to cut back on your caffeine intake( my problem also) and start drinking lots of water. Is the redness and flaking happening on your face, say around your nose? It seems a lot of people are developing this redness.. including myself and several of my friends and I'm not sure what the cause is. In the meantime don't rub the area, put some lotion on it. I'm going to setup an appointment with my dermatologist and see if there is anything they know about it.

 

[BoberFett]

Just wanted to reply to this:

<< I'd say to try to avoid medication for the stress, it should be something with which you can deal alone. In my experience with my grandfather after my grandmother died, all drugs do is mask the underlying problem without being of any real help, and often the person on the drugs complains of not feeling like themselves. >>

No, I would not recommend drugs alone. I don't think drugs should be used without also seeing a counselor/therapist on a regular basis to deal with the mental/emotional side of it. But drugs can be helpful.

As far as saying you should be able to deal with it alone, that's pure horsesh!t. That's the macho answer to dealing with life, and while it may work most of the time, sometimes life can get overwhelming enough that you can't handle it on your own. There's no shame in needing help sometimes.

 

[ArkAoss]

hmmm..... sounds bad man, you in Mass right?? its april, after tax week, take the gf, a little cash, and just head east, into the mountians of mass, find a little bed and breakfast way out in no wheres, and just crash for a week or two, get out, walk around a local state park, make out in the park till the rangers come.


If you can at least take a weekend, cruise in your car out to the mountains, find a small forested state park, rent a little hotel room near it, then explore it over a weekend. I've got lots of fam. in the mountains of the eastern end of mass.
If you ever need to really disappear in Mass, lmk.

 

[Windogg]

Thanks to everyone for the kind advice (Big thanks to Boberfett and cablegod)

I think it's time to take a vacation. I just checked and I have a lot of time available. Supporting 150+ users (network, desktops, printers, PBX, etc) plus 4 other sites alone (bye bye Help Desk) is really getting to me. Tack on a non-existant budget and no fault tolerance and things get pretty hairy. I stay up alot at night wondering what the hell I will I do if a HDD failed.

 

[SuperGroove]

Steal your brothers M5 for the weekend at hit the track.



Sigh...oh I wish to have a hot car...

 

[Zenmervolt]

<<it should be something with which you can deal alone>>

I just want to be clear that when I said this I meant &quot;alone&quot; as in &quot;without the help of drugs&quot;, not as in &quot;without the help of other people&quot;. Re-reading my original post had me realize that I was somewhat vague with what I meant by &quot;alone&quot;. As BoberFett said, there is definitely no shame in needing help sometimes (or even often) and I just wanted to point out that I was not trying to advocate avoiding the help of others.

Zenmervolt