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BriGy86

Diamond Member
Sep 10, 2004
4,537
1
91
Originally posted by: Ausm
Chicks are attracted to men who are assholes and nice guys usually get fvcked no pun inteded.


Ausm

QFT :thumbsup:

so start off the date with a slap up side her head
 
Oct 9, 1999
19,632
37
91
dude, you're not ugly. i'm not gay but i've seen uglier peopl(lots) on the forums and some even have gf's.

it's your self-confidence. one thing i always think about before going up to a girl i don't know in public is that if ****** gets sour, chances are that i'll never see this girl again.

can't stay back and wonder what if.
 

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
6
81
You are far from ugly. you are quite cute, imho.

Sit up straight, smile often and act confident. if you are not confident by nature... fake it until you make it.

and don't worry about being knocked down a few times before getting anywhere. think of it like a computer game... how may hits does a player have to take before they reach the next level?


 

iwantanewcomputer

Diamond Member
Apr 4, 2004
5,045
0
0
i'm in more or less the same position, ive had girls that i've beeen friends with, and girls that i kind of go out on dates with, but ever a real girlfriend. I just haven't had that many opportunities. I went to an all guy high school and a mostly guy college. just haven't had many chances. Just start out goofing around and have fun meeting girls. don't even try to get dates at first, just meet them. The interested ones will make it apparent. talk to them and be friendly with them more, then just ask them out.

working out also helps. Girls will say this isn't necessarily true, but most get a lot more interested when you flash your cut arms or move something heavy
 

meltdown75

Lifer
Nov 17, 2004
37,548
7
81
you mentioned a fear of rejection.

don't be afraid. what do you have to lose? even the studliest of men get rejected. getting rejected can sometimes be fun and hilarious if you go about it with a good sense of humour. don't take yourself too seriously. if you're @ school, you have even less to worry about... it's not like you're stuck in your hometown looking for a peice of action! take advantage of where you're at right now. trust me, you will never have such an abundance of dating potential as you can experience while you're in school. i know there's a lot of talent in London, i've seen it first hand! get out there and test the waters, i think you will do fine.

- Melty :beer:
 

Azraele

Elite Member
Nov 5, 2000
16,524
29
91
It's your self confidence. The only thing I would add to your face would be a smile.
 

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
6
81
Originally posted by: LoKe
I've never really tried. I'd like to...but I have an extreme fear of rejection.

Thanks for all the opinions/suggestions though. It really helps.


And you will be rejected a few times. And it will be embarassing, and painful and it will really suck. But it will happen. It happens to everyone. And it is just something you have to go thru in order to achieve the desired end result.

It is a choice you have to make. Never try so you never experience rejection... or do it, get rejected a few times and find someone.

It is like everything else in life... you either benefit from it, or you learn from it.

Don't be scared.


 

dullard

Elite Member
May 21, 2001
25,476
3,976
126
I didn't read the thread, so what I say may all be a repeat.

Loke, I've been there, I've done that. I too had far too low of self-confidence (search for some of my shy threads if you don't believe me). Thinking that I was unattractive when I wasn't (you aren't either). You can mostly overcome it. It will be a long, slow process.

1) You are the only person who is rejecting you. No one else is. If you have few friends, no girlfriends, etc, it is due solely to you choosing NOT to have them.

2) You have to realize that the only possible way to fail is to do nothing. If you never ask a girl out, you'll never go out, and thus you failed. You just rejected yourself out of the dating pool. Thus, no matter what happens if you ask a girl on a date you did better than if you didn't ask one out. A girl saying "no" is less of a failure than never asking her in the first place.

3) Find something that you feel you are good at. Become the best you can at that. Let yourself be proud of it. Whatever it is, it doesn't matter. You can be the best in school, best employee, best soccer player, best poet, etc. Whatever you like to do. Do it well. Now you have something to feel good about, something to talk to women about, something to do with a woman, something to help your struggling confidence, etc.

4) Force yourself into social situations. I don't care how painful it is, just go. Don't sit at home alone. A really, really great suggestion is to take group dance lessons (salsa, swing, ballroom, country, etc). I've seen dozens of people escape the low-confidence shell from dance (me included). Suddenly you'll have tens of attractive women wanting to touch your body and you don't have to say a word and you don't have to worry about asking them out or worry about being rejected. The confidence with women will slowly grow.

5) Do something about your looks. No, you aren't at all bad looking. Pretty decent if I say so myself. But, you don't like them. So change them. Buy a few dumbbells and lift for a few months. Or start running. Watch your body become stronger. Will women like you more? Maybe, maybe not. But if you like the new muscles, you might start to like yourself more.

6) Don't try to get a girl right away. You have to fix #1, #3, #4, and #5 first.
 
Jun 4, 2005
19,723
1
0
:thumbsup:

Thanks for all the help.

Originally posted by: CraigRT
Originally posted by: LoKe
Originally posted by: Iron Woode
Originally posted by: LoKe
Originally posted by: SampSon
Think less, do more.
Are you anywhere near toronto? Toronto girls are easy.

I'm actually in London. ^^;
Woot! Woot! for London.

I like it here.

Hm...out of curiosity, where are you in London?

Westmount..

I see you are from Belle River. I used to live near there when I was young!

I'm in London now, and I too live in Westmount.
 
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