nobody to discuss this with

[Canai]

long story short. My stepfather blew approximatively $7.5 million trading on the margin in the past two years, against all advice. This includes all of my savings, all of my mom's savings. Everything. I've bottled this up for a long time, I know I'm not going to get much sympathy here, but I need to talk to someone who understands about this. I'm 24, am about to sell my car to continue college (I took a couple years off) but I really need someone to talk to about everything. All my friends have no clue about anything to do with this, I don't want to let people I know know about this for fear of social repercussions.

This is anonymous enough that I don't have to worry about people I know IRL learning about this.

 

[n7]

WTF would he have access to YOUR savings?

Sorry to hear, but why in the world would be sticking around in a situation like this?

 

[venkman]

You're 24, two years ago you were 22. How does you stepfather touch your savings without you writing him a check?


You didn't write him a check, did you?

 

[Hyperlite]

You're 24, two years ago you were 22. How does you stepfather touch your savings without you writing him a check?


You didn't write him a check, did you?

This. Deets, stat.

 

[Canai]

WTF would he have access to YOUR savings?

Sorry to hear, but why in the world would be sticking around in a situation like this?

I was underage when he came around. My savings were in an account he had access to. My mother is very near divorce from him now (sleeping in separate rooms, not wearing a ring, wondering why she is still with him)

My wishes to continue college have begun raising funding issues. Due to his spending, I cannot qualify for any financial aid or grants, which leaves me on my own to continue college. Nobody I know is in anything near a similar situation, which lead me to post here. I don't know what I should do now.

 

[Anonemous]

Could be joint account he had with his mom which was linked to his step dad.

 

[TallBill]

Yeah I'm confused at how it is 'your' money...

 

[Anonemous]

Can you ask your biological dad for any support?

 

[IronWing]

First, make sure your finances are completely separate from your parent's finances.

Take stock of where you are now financially. Plan your path from there. Cars are expensive. Jettisoning your car may be the best move you could make in the long run.

When you say "my savings" were the savings truly yours? What I mean is: was this money that your stepfather had a legal right to spend/invest as he saw fit or was there a fiduciary responsibility on his part to make sure his actions with the money benefited you? If the former, write it off and move on. If the latter, is there a possibility of recovering the money? If so, is it worth the time and hassle in your life to bother? If not, write it off.

 

[Canai]

This. Deets, stat.

This is just now coming to light with him finally filing taxes, several years late. I've known about this for about 5 months now. He hasn't said anything to me or my mom about this yet.

 

[Hyperlite]

Alright, understandable, and i'm truly sorry. Have you thought about speaking to a lawyer or financial advisor? I know these things may cost money, and i'm not suggesting litigation, but you obviously need to sever all ties to his name and start new. You can do it. Are you employed?

 

[Rumpltzer]

The financial affaris and problems of your parents are not yours. Cut financial ties. Move on.


Paying for college is not difficult when you're financially independent of your parents. If you make like $10K a year and you're in college, the government pretty much throws free money at you.

Ask me how I know.

 

[Canai]

This. Deets, stat.

This is just now coming to light with him finally filing taxes, several years late. I've known about this for about 5 months now. He hasn't said anything to me or my mom about this yet.

 

[brblx]

7.5mil on margin? through what broker?

shens, period.

 

[Rumpltzer]

The financial affaris and problems of your parents are not yours. Cut financial ties. Move on.


Paying for college is not difficult when you're financially independent of your parents. If you make like $10K a year and you're in college, the government pretty much throws free money at you.

Ask me how I know.

 

[Canai]

Can you ask your biological dad for any support?

Short answer, no. Long answer, stepmom is a ruthless bitch who has sued my mother multiple times.

7.5mil on margin? through was broker.

shens, period.

Scottrade is full of shens then. I'm not kidding on this. My stepfather is beginning to lose it and the broker was more concerned with himself then the financial security of my family, or at least the trading speaks for this. I don't know, having never spoken with the broker in question.

 

[Anonemous]

Well you may have to buckle down to ask your dad for help since he is your dad. Also start preparing for bankruptcy proceedings and nasty creditor phone calls.

 

[Hyperlite]

Well you may have to buckle down to ask your dad for help since he is your dad. Also start preparing for bankruptcy proceedings and nasty creditor phone calls.

Doesn't sound like he has the assets for something like that to be necessary. OP, do you have any outstanding debt?

 

[Canai]

Alright, understandable, and i'm truly sorry. Have you thought about speaking to a lawyer or financial advisor? I know these things may cost money, and i'm not suggesting litigation, but you obviously need to sever all ties to his name and start new. You can do it. Are you employed?

I work for the college I'm going to. It is a federal job making weak money for part time. I have considered getting a lawyer, but the fact of the matter is my stepfather has no money. Period. He has whatever is tied up in the 3x mortgaged house he and my mother live in, and some money in gold and silver, but not anywhere enough to pay off the 1.2ish M house they live in.

First, make sure your finances are completely separate from your parent's finances.

Take stock of where you are now financially. Plan your path from there. Cars are expensive. Jettisoning your car may be the best move you could make in the long run.

When you say "my savings" were the savings truly yours? What I mean is: was this money that your stepfather had a legal right to spend/invest as he saw fit or was there a fiduciary responsibility on his part to make sure his actions with the money benefited you? If the former, write it off and move on. If the latter, is there a possibility of recovering the money? If so, is it worth the time and hassle in your life to bother? If not, write it off.

Yes, the savings were mine. Grandparents giving bonds for birthdays kind of savings. He racked up the debt and paid for it however he could, which meant depleting my savings held jointly with his spouse, my mother.

 

[brblx]

scottrade is pretty much a DIY brokerage, i'm sure he probably completed his transactions electronically. i've used them but never been in a branch or anything, so i don't know what kind of advisement they may offer...but it's not their primary purpose.

my question is how any broker would allow someone to trade that kind of volume and build that kind of debt on margin trading.

is this supposed 7.5mil loss mostly from one huge event or just years of lots of shitty trading? if the latter i would have to think the margin calls would have caught up with him long ago.

 

[Canai]

Doesn't sound like he has the assets for something like that to be necessary. OP, do you have any outstanding debt?

I do not have any debt. My car is paid off, and I am renting a house. I have been going to a cheap community college for transfer credits, but to transfer requires about 5x the money. Due to my stepfather's actions, I do not qualify for any sort of loans or grants, so this is where I am at wit's end as far as paying for the rest of school. I cannot stay at tech school forever which is why I'm thinking of selling my car for school. I have an 06 Passat with about 35K miles on it, in perfect shape, which I am considering selling to finance one semester of school. After that I don't know what I'll do.

 

[Xcobra]

The financial affaris and problems of your parents are not yours. Cut financial ties. Move on.


Paying for college is not difficult when you're financially independent of your parents. If you make like $10K a year and you're in college, the government pretty much throws free money at you.

Ask me how I know.

How do you know? haha

OP, paying for college, like Rumpltzer said, should be relatively easy if you're independent from your parents. If you're doing FAFSA, it might not be easy to prove you're independent given their definition of it. Good luck and sorry to hear about your mishap.

 

[Canai]

scottrade is pretty much a DIY brokerage, i'm sure he probably completed his transactions electronically. i've used them but never been in a branch or anything, so i don't know what kind of advisement they may offer...but it's not their primary purpose.

my question is how any broker would allow someone to trade that kind of volume and build that kind of debt on margin trading.

is this supposed 7.5mil loss mostly from one huge event or just years of lots of shitty trading? if the latter i would have to think the margin calls would have caught up with him long ago.

It happened in about 9 months according to the records I have access to. Essentially he got his inheritance from his parents and blew that plus the family savings trading in a bear market. As I mentioned before he is no longer fully there mentally. Not only is it financially stressful but physiologically as well. I moved back home for about a month to see if it would work out to save the money but there's so much stress between my mother and stepfather it is not workable.

 

[SandEagle]

Can you ask your biological dad for any support?

sorry man, i'm broke. oh shi.......!!!

 

[Canai]

How do you know? haha

OP, paying for college, like Rumpltzer said, should be relatively easy if you're independent from your parents. If you're doing FAFSA, it might not be easy to prove you're independent given their definition of it. Good luck and sorry to hear about your mishap.

Until this year I have been on my father's insurance, which entailed my stepmother (the evil bitch) committing insurance fraud (since she didn't pay for half of my schooling) to claim me as a dependent and let me on the family insurance policy.

This year I can no longer be claimed as a dependent due to my age. Due to my parent's tax returns from the past year, (1.2ishM on stepdad and 750ishK on stepmom) I do not qualify for any financial aid for next year. Neither side of my family will give me money for school. I cannot qualify for FAFSA due to parental income.

Hence my inability to make a rational and sound decision on my own. None of my friends know about any of this so I can't talk to them.