Not too many things scarier than meeting a girl in person...

[Ryuson99]

Originally posted by: bapace

Originally posted by: Ryuson99

Actually it is the same as you would lie in a club or bar in order to bone the chick that you meet. It take time in order for you or her to find out if both of you belong together.

I said meet women, not lie and try to sleep with them. Maybe that is why you don't meet quality women, because you are talking them up to sleep with them. If it's going to happen, it's going to happen. I for one do not lie to women in the club, what is there to lie about? my age? I'm 23. My job? I have a good job with a great company, so no need to lie. It is MUCH harder to lie in person than online. Each girl I have dated can sense the slightest bit of a lie, so what is the point?

-bapace

I don't lie to a girl when I meet her. I was just stating what you said in your past post, ok maybe I strecthed it a little bit, but you saying that you would know their personality and such is rubish(saw my first top gear episode), Knowing who someone is takes time and effort. You can not know who somebody is by just one meeting, that is why I say talking to someone online you can gather more information than meeting someone in a bar or club; there is no need for an icebreaker really and if there is..., its more than always "ASL" as if when you meet someone in person you would think and wonder what your opening line would be.

As far as I know from your posts in this topic it would seem as you don't have a problem with communicating with the opposite sex but this is not the same for the rest of the community.


Edit: And who says that I can not meet a quality woman? see you are already assuming and you know what they say about assuming. I have no problems meeting a girl be it from online or from a club, Im just saying not everybody can talk to a person the way they can online and not everyone who talks to girls online can't get one in a club. Some people just have prefrences or do both. and the OP deciding to meet one is no problem if he asks for advise just answer. Him not knowing how she looks of course is going to put doubts in his mind, but him talking to someone online should not state that he is unable to chat, talk to someone in a club, bar, or any other place.

 

[Doomer]

One big problem I have is there doesn't seem to be any place locally that single girls hang out. I recently met a hottie who had just found her soul mate (or so she thinks). I asked her where the single women hung out. She said she didn't have a clue. she NEVER went out alone looking for a man and she didn't know any other single women who did. When she went out, it was with a group of friends and NEVER with the thought in mind of hooking up with a man.

she said most people meet thru mutual friends, work, church, etc. This is a big problem for me because there is absolutely no one in my circle of friends and work aquaninces that is available who I would even remotely consider. I don't go to church and never will (believe me I have a very good reason). Bars are ok if you're looking for a one night stand but I won't hold my breath until I meet a nice girl in one. It may be different in other parts of the country but around here, all you'll find in bars are sluts.

So that leaves the net. At least you know she's looking which is half the battle.

 

[Ryuson99]

Originally posted by: Doomer
One big problem I have is there doesn't seem to be any place locally that single girls hang out. I recently met a hottie who had just found her soul mate (or so she thinks). I asked her where the single women hung out. She said she didn't have a clue. she NEVER went out alone looking for a man and she didn't know any other single women who did. When she went out, it was with a group of friends and NEVER with the thought in mind of hooking up with a man.

she said most people meet thru mutual friends, work, church, etc. This is a big problem for me because there is absolutely no one in my circle of friends and work aquaninces that is available who I would even remotely consider. I don't go to church and never will (believe me I have a very good reason). Bars are ok if you're looking for a one night stand but I won't hold my breath until I meet a nice girl in one. It may be different in other parts of the country but around here, all you'll find in bars are sluts.

So that leaves the net. At least you know she's looking which is half the battle.

What I noticed is that you are already stereotyping girls in bar when in fact not all are the way you say they are. I'll say maybe one in every 10 can become "wifey". It seems that you don't want to try hard in order to find a good woman, you just want the easy baken which of course is online because you can easily leave a conversation if not intrested by a close of a box.

Really all im saying is meet this girl and if you are not intrested continue your venture but don't limit it just to AOL, look for a girl in all places more than likely you will find one where you least expect it; just ask half the people here where they met their soulmate(wife/husband).

 

[skace]

Originally posted by: bapace
I'm very shy as well, but when you see something, go for it. The current girl I'm seeing is a bartender from a bar I frequent. She pursued me, after I showed interest, totally took the edge off.

-bapace

A shy person would never be in a bar. You arn't as shy as you believe you are.

 

[Koing]

Bar girls want a 'relationship' also guys...

They just go out to bars as they don't fancy or don't want to try other stuff.

Join a bunch of activities BUT then you still have to meet up with girls.

Another ploy is to just go out to town and to just random people walking by. Introduce yourself as 'my name' then ask them theirs and see if they want to go grab coffee or dinner sometime. But this takes balls though but I'm sure if you did you'd get a number at least after a few.

Koing

 

[rh71]

I had started writing a girl back in '92 via Prodigy... I finally met her in person in '01. Crazy/weird... and we remain good friends till this day.

 

[moshquerade]

so did you meet her? how did it go?

i have met a guy from off the net before and it went well, but i know what you mean about not being sure what to expect even when you have done all you can with them online.

 

[murphy55d]

I went to the movies with a girl I met off the net last night. She is cool. Not sure where any of it's going, but I think we'll probably at least be friends.

It's easy for some people to "just go out and meet girls". If only it were that easy for everyone. And it's not just because people are nerds and have never even spoken to a woman before...there are a lot of reasons, some people are afraid of up-front rejection(me), some people are just really quiet/shy, etc. I'm a pretty normal guy but when it comes to trying to introduce myself to girls and stuff I am not so good. So usually the only way I meet girls is through friends, or the net. I've had good and bad experiences from both situations.

 

[jspeicher]

a/s/l

 

[atiyeh]

I see nothing wrong with meeting girls over the net. That's how I met the girl I'm seeing now. We've been talking for 6 months almost every other night and with webcams too so that makes it a bit easier but without seeing her...i don't know if I could have made it past a month. I have to know what someone looks like. That's just me.

 

[AlienCraft]

Originally posted by: LeadFrog
$100 it turns out to be a guy.

<austin powers> That's a MAN , BaBY</Austin Powers>

The only other scarier thing is meeting her parents.

 

[Pepsi90919]

i met someone online and we lasted about 2 months. after that she turned psycho.

 

[monzi]

Originally posted by: Ryuson99

Originally posted by: bapace

Originally posted by: Ryuson99

Actually it is the same as you would lie in a club or bar in order to bone the chick that you meet. It take time in order for you or her to find out if both of you belong together.

I said meet women, not lie and try to sleep with them. Maybe that is why you don't meet quality women, because you are talking them up to sleep with them. If it's going to happen, it's going to happen. I for one do not lie to women in the club, what is there to lie about? my age? I'm 23. My job? I have a good job with a great company, so no need to lie. It is MUCH harder to lie in person than online. Each girl I have dated can sense the slightest bit of a lie, so what is the point?

-bapace

I don't lie to a girl when I meet her. I was just stating what you said in your past post, ok maybe I strecthed it a little bit, but you saying that you would know their personality and such is rubish(saw my first top gear episode), Knowing who someone is takes time and effort. You can not know who somebody is by just one meeting, that is why I say talking to someone online you can gather more information than meeting someone in a bar or club; there is no need for an icebreaker really and if there is..., its more than always "ASL" as if when you meet someone in person you would think and wonder what your opening line would be.

As far as I know from your posts in this topic it would seem as you don't have a problem with communicating with the opposite sex but this is not the same for the rest of the community.


Edit: And who says that I can not meet a quality woman? see you are already assuming and you know what they say about assuming. I have no problems meeting a girl be it from online or from a club, Im just saying not everybody can talk to a person the way they can online and not everyone who talks to girls online can't get one in a club. Some people just have prefrences or do both. and the OP deciding to meet one is no problem if he asks for advise just answer. Him not knowing how she looks of course is going to put doubts in his mind, but him talking to someone online should not state that he is unable to chat, talk to someone in a club, bar, or any other place.

Well said.

Originally posted by: jspeicher
a/s/l

18/M/Mass

 

[Freejack2]

Originally posted by: Orsorum
Ugh. Too many bad experiences. One good, but three bad to match that.

 

[Staples]

Originally posted by: Doomer
We've established that there is some common ground between us. I have made no attempt to conform myself to what I think she's looking for. I learned the hard way that that is not a good idea. I sent her a pic of me. She claims her card reader isn't working so she can't send me a pic of her. this is kinda suspect but what the heck, she might just be telling the truth.

Us getting together on the net is kinda a fluke. I'm well aware of the fact that most women who make themselves available on the Internet do so because they are either psycho or fat and/or ugly. I'm hoping to beat the odds on this one.

Well it seems like you have the right expectations in knowing that the odds are heavily against you. Hope it works out though.

 

[lastrhino]

Originally posted by: bapace
I'm very shy as well, but when you see something, go for it. The current girl I'm seeing is a bartender from a bar I frequent. She pursued me, after I showed interest, totally took the edge off.

-bapace

Good for you. Those $20 tips sure do break the ice don't they.

 

[chowmein]

whatever happen to going to the bar, or bumping someone at the supermarket or something. why must you people resort to ONLINE dating.

stop being social pariahs. women arent scary, not at first. they only become demanding and livid after you meet them.

 

[lastrhino]

I gave up on the online thing after meeting 4 borderline psychos. Then a couple years later, a friend convinced me to try it agian. After 3 more duds I met my now wife.

If you realize you don't want to date the woman you meet, that doesn't mean you still can't have fun. While I met and dated my share of psychos, I also had fun with them as well. Psycho != Bad/Evil/Scarry. Good Luck!

 

[IHateMyJob2004]

Originally posted by: Doomer
That you met on the Internet. you never know what to expect, LOL.

I get to do this today. Ya'll wish me luck.

My wife was met on the internet. Did it through match.com. Basicall,y if you are sick of looking, just use online services. It makes it very easy to find a good match.

I wanted an educated wife with decent pay. landed me a teacher!

 

[lastrhino]

Originally posted by: chowmein
whatever happen to going to the bar, or bumping someone at the supermarket or something. why must you people resort to ONLINE dating.

stop being social pariahs. women arent scary, not at first. they only become demanding and livid after you meet them.

Why must people like you degrade those who choose to meet people online? Not everyone is as socially outgoing as you. Get over it.

 

[Chadder007]

Originally posted by: LeadFrog
$100 it turns out to be a guy.

....or that it used to be a guy.....

 

[Chadder007]

....or is going to be a girl.....soon...
(I know a couple that met on the internet like this, the one that is changing to a girl happens to have been my best friend since 3rd grade. ) Guy met guy....he acted like a girl for over a year and never spoke to him on the phone. Just chatted online. Guy comes out to meet him and finds out that he is a guy....but is planning on becoming a girl soon.

I haven't talked to him....er her for a few months now.

 

[FreshFish]

Hey Doomer, we need an update when you're back from your date btw

 

[Bateluer]

I dunno, building a computer for a friend and having nothing happen when you push the power button the first time is pretty scary . . .

FYI - Thats never happened to me, but its always in my mind right before I push the power button the first time.

 

[torpid]

Have you exchanged pictures? It's hard but not all that much harder than any other first date. I always find the hardest part is at the end of the date, when it's time to say goodbye. I think it takes a PHD to figure out the proper farewell response and/or phrase.