Pizza !!!!!

[alkemyst]

hahahahaaaaaa.....can I buy some of those good drugs you are taking???

I don't do drugs, I do drink mich ultra though.

You must have the absolutely most boring life.

I am betting you have fucked less than 5 women in your life.

I am betting that is going to really piss you off now.

 

[mikeford]

Looks like dung. Now this is a pizza!

Kashi pizza will knock your socks off with its tasty sauce! Also, its organic! Eat it with your favorite beer! It's also good for you. I call it "Good for you Pizza!"

Reminds me of a nasty scab I had once.

 

[MongGrel]

I don't do drugs, I do drink mich ultra though.

You must have the absolutely most boring life.

I am betting you have fucked less than 5 women in your life.

I am betting that is going to really piss you off now.

And by the way when I was single years ago I fucked three very pretty ones in one weekend, rookie.

 

[DrPizza]

Have had a few friends that cracked stones before by putting cold into contact with them while hot.

Ya positive you might not be doing it wrong perhaps ?

:biggrin:

Tell your friends not to put frozen pizzas on the pizza stone. And, I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about when it comes to pizza.

 

[Hayabusa Rider]

Is your pizza faster than a car?

Getting away from how many girls have been had, I'm partial to NYC style pizza at home. What I could use is a thick piece of aluminium plate instead of a stone. It's thermal mass and conductivity would go a long way to compensate for our low temperature ovens. With pizza it's the crust that's the thing.

 

[Hayabusa Rider]

OK Doc, let's build a WFO!

 

[NetWareHead]

I don't do drugs, I do drink mich ultra though.

You must have the absolutely most boring life.

I am betting you have fucked less than 5 women in your life.

I am betting that is going to really piss you off now.

Will you STFU Alky? This is a pizza thread. Dont turn it yet another dick measuring contest. Fucking one trick pony you are...

 

[_Rick_]

Your pizzas are too high.
And some of your pizzas have waaaay too much going on.

A good Pizza has a hard crust, no higher than 1/4" at the most, and around 1/8" on average. The dough is around 1/24" in thickness, sometimes down to 1/32".
There is an almost transparent layer of (dried and fresh) tomato sauce, with some chopped basil in it at the bottom. Above that, there's a single layer of toppings, consisting of - at most - 3 ingredients. Less is better. Cheese (Mozarella usually, but obviously there are cheese pizzas too) can be over or under, depending on the toppings, and isn't really mandatory.

This means that a good pizza will have to be large diameter, as there simply isn't very much nutritional value per square inch.

Baking time is around 5-7 minutes on the stone. Some toppings are added only after baking.

You can tell a good pizza joint from a bad one, by how it's Margherita tastes. The sauce and dough are where the real magic happens, any idiot can throw on some reasonably fresh toppings.

 

[Mai72]

Reminds me of a nasty scab I had once.

It's organic!

 

[BurnItDwn]

Ehh, I think there's 3 very different "schools of pizza"

First and foremost, I love a good Chicago deep dish. Something like Lou Malnatis, with a thin crust set up like a pie crust, then, with loads of toppings and sauce, then cheese, then more sauce. A good deep dish is about having a good buttery crust, good toppings, lots of cheese, and most important is awesome sauce. It truly is a "pie."

Secondly, is a the fold-able thin crust. Not the dry "cracker crust", but, big slices you can fold in half, somewhat thin, seasoned, cheesed, and sauced. These are a balance of all the ingredients. Usually they are cooked very hot, and not very long. Around me, this is the "Slyce" Coal Oven pizza place. It's probably the closest I've had to real NY or Sicilian pizza. It's very good, but a completely different animal from the deep dish.


Thirdly there's the "cracker crust" that some of my friends love. This is my least favorite style of the 3 schools of pizza. It's essentially "bar pizza", tasty when your drunk, but otherwise, not really that great. Biting it is like biting into jawbreakers. It's tasty, but, not nearly as soft as the other pizza types. Often this has more seasoning vs the other pizza types, and it's always dry, no matter how much sauce. It makes me so damn thirsty that the thought of it is enough to realize that i will only eat it when I'm drunk.

Sure, there is "stuffed pizza, which is essentially, a big variation on the whole deep dish thing. Or there's Fast food pizzas which essentially, is like the thin crust, but, with thicker crust, less sauce, less topings, and imitation cheese.

Anyhow, I love me a good Lou Malnatis or some Slyce. I assume whenever I decide to visit NYC, that I will be able to review very favorably some NY pizza joints.

The pizza that the OP brewed in his oven, does not appear to be very appetizing...

 

[shortylickens]

i prefer deep dish but can eat anything if its good.

 

[DrPizza]

The pizza that the OB brewed in his over, does not appear to be very appetizing...

I do disagree with that though. On a 1 to 10 pizza scale, it's certainly no where near a 10. But on the 1 to 10 inedible vs. edible food scale, it looks like it would still score high enough to satisfy me. Or to put it another way, poor pizza is still pretty good food. Pizza has to be pretty damn bad before I'd say that it sucks as food. Hence, people actually eat Dominoes, Pizza Hut, Little Caesar's, etc.

 

[BurnItDwn]

I do disagree with that though. On a 1 to 10 pizza scale, it's certainly no where near a 10. But on the 1 to 10 inedible vs. edible food scale, it looks like it would still score high enough to satisfy me. Or to put it another way, poor pizza is still pretty good food. Pizza has to be pretty damn bad before I'd say that it sucks as food. Hence, people actually eat Dominoes, Pizza Hut, Little Caesar's, etc.

I am spoiled by all the good pizza places. So, I am clearly not fair to the OP.
If I were to compare it to "frozen pizza", or "fast food pizza" type places, then yes, yes yes, I can see your point.

It does look better than pizza hut or Dominoes for sure!!!!!!

And it clearly looks like a real pizza.

(Also, wow, ob, over, What the hell was I typing!)

 

[Quirky Chick]

Yeah I remember that pizza, I had so much Gas I could have gassed up my mom's car for 10 years , If there would have been less cheese it would have been perfect. Tony's pizza is safe for now, lol

 

[M0oG0oGaiPan]

Turkish pizza?

 

[NetWareHead]

Turkish pizza?

Reminds me of Armenian lahmejune (spelling)

 

[heymrdj]

Your pizzas are too high.
And some of your pizzas have waaaay too much going on.

A good Pizza has a hard crust, no higher than 1/4" at the most, and around 1/8" on average. The dough is around 1/24" in thickness, sometimes down to 1/32".
There is an almost transparent layer of (dried and fresh) tomato sauce, with some chopped basil in it at the bottom. Above that, there's a single layer of toppings, consisting of - at most - 3 ingredients. Less is better. Cheese (Mozarella usually, but obviously there are cheese pizzas too) can be over or under, depending on the toppings, and isn't really mandatory.

This means that a good pizza will have to be large diameter, as there simply isn't very much nutritional value per square inch.

Baking time is around 5-7 minutes on the stone. Some toppings are added only after baking.

You can tell a good pizza joint from a bad one, by how it's Margherita tastes. The sauce and dough are where the real magic happens, any idiot can throw on some reasonably fresh toppings.

I love to really taste a good sauce, and I love it to lube things up. Transparent sauced pizzas are crap to me. A nice thick crispy bottomed dough is a must, I want to taste the bread the artisan created to enhance the flavor of everything, it's not a tasteless cracker to just be a vessel for toppings. I can eat a spoon full of toppings anywhere, the crust is what makes it a pizza instead of a deconstructed salad.

IMHO your taste in pizza is very boring, one note flavor.