Please post your nsfw haiku and limmericks here :)

[CKent]

Tobacco will kill you, and fast
Caffeine zonks you out once it's passed
I've never been sicker
Than with too much liquor
Pot is truly the best repast

 

[oiprocs]

CKent was meeting with his bookie
When he had an urge for some nookie
He stopped to see Lois Lane
Looked through her window pane
And saw a black guy loosening that pussy

 

[Braznor]

A young woman named Starkie,
Had sex with a darkie,
the result of her sins,
were quads, not twins,
one white, one black and two khaki!

 

[Billyzeke]

There once was a fellow O'Doole
Who found little red spots on his tool
His Doctor a cynic
said Get out of me clinic,
And wipe off that lipstick you fool!

 

[Billyzeke]

The night was dark the sky was blue
Around the curve a shit wagon flew
A bump was hit, a scream was heard,
a man was hit by a flying turd
Upon his tomb these words were wrote
"This man died with a turd in his throat"

Not exactly a limerick or haiku but so what its still funny.

 

[polarmystery]

Originally posted by: silverpig
There was a young fellow named perkin
Who was always jerkin his gherkin
His father said perkin
Stop jerkin your gherkin
Your gherkins fer ferkin not jerkin

:thumbsup:

 

[polarmystery]

Originally posted by: Atomic Playboy

Originally posted by: Billyzeke

Originally posted by: scott916

Originally posted by: BoomerD
There once was a man from Nantucket...

Who had a dick so long he could suck it...

He said with a grin,
as he wiped off his chin..........

If my ear was a pussy, I'd fuck it.

also good :thumbsup:

 

[CKent]

Originally posted by: scorpious
CKent was meeting with his bookie
When he had an urge for some nookie
He stopped to see Lois Lane
Looked through her window pane
And saw a black guy loosening that pussy

Lois has never been meek
I'm aware of her wild streak
She gets a bit pissed
When I don't use my fist
So the black guy scandal is weak

 

[oiprocs]

Originally posted by: CKent

Originally posted by: scorpious
CKent was meeting with his bookie
When he had an urge for some nookie
He stopped to see Lois Lane
Looked through her window pane
And saw a black guy loosening that pussy

Lois has never been meek
I'm aware of her wild streak
She gets a bit pissed
When I don't use my fist
So the black guy scandal is weak

CKent thought he was prominent
Retorting back like he was "Karma Prince"
But what he did not know
Is that he has to show
A much larger stance of dominance

 

[Jeff7]

Good stuff in this tread. Moar!!!

 

[hanoverphist]

Originally posted by: Atomic Playboy

Originally posted by: Billyzeke

Originally posted by: scott916

Originally posted by: BoomerD
There once was a man from Nantucket...

Who had a dick so long he could suck it...

He said with a grin,
as he wiped off his chin..........

If my ear was a pussy, I'd fuck it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/T...s_a_man_from_Nantucket

its not pussy...

 

[CKent]

Originally posted by: scorpious

Originally posted by: CKent

Originally posted by: scorpious
CKent was meeting with his bookie
When he had an urge for some nookie
He stopped to see Lois Lane
Looked through her window pane
And saw a black guy loosening that pussy

Lois has never been meek
I'm aware of her wild streak
She gets a bit pissed
When I don't use my fist
So the black guy scandal is weak

CKent thought he was prominent
Retorting back like he was "Karma Prince"
But what he did not know
Is that he has to show
A much larger stance of dominance

It's true that I hang my head low
And might not have that masculine glow
But the log in my pants
Means I don't need The Stance
To avoid ever being told "no"

 

[oiprocs]

Originally posted by: CKent

Originally posted by: scorpious

Originally posted by: CKent

Originally posted by: scorpious
CKent was meeting with his bookie
When he had an urge for some nookie
He stopped to see Lois Lane
Looked through her window pane
And saw a black guy loosening that pussy

Lois has never been meek
I'm aware of her wild streak
She gets a bit pissed
When I don't use my fist
So the black guy scandal is weak

CKent thought he was prominent
Retorting back like he was "Karma Prince"
But what he did not know
Is that he has to show
A much larger stance of dominance

It's true that I hang my head low
And might not have that masculine glow
But the log in my pants
Means I don't need The Stance
To avoid ever being told "no"

A log like that needs a hog tie strap
A strap so strong it wraps the skin tight back
But as the circulation tightens
And the anus sphincter widens
You realize you're fucking his ass crack

 

[CKent]

The size of my meat's beyond question
In porn I'm an "Honorable Mention"
As for teh ghey
I don't go that way
If I did, gay rights would have blessin's

 

[oiprocs]

Originally posted by: CKent
The size of my meat's beyond question
In porn I'm an "Honorable Mention"
As for teh ghey
I don't go that way
If I did, gay rights would have blessin's

Your point is taken like a fiancée
You don't choose boys over Beyoncé
Unfortunately I'm mean
I love to cause a scene
Your pubes are in neat long braids

 

[Billyzeke]

A right twisted wench from Caprees-ed
Orgasmed each time that she sneez-ed
To the druggist she went
And laid down her last cent
Said, "A barrel of snuff, if you pleas-ed."

 

[OverVolt]

This thread is NSFAN

Not safe for anyone normal.

 

[Billyzeke]

Originally posted by: OverVolt
This thread is NSFAN

Not safe for anyone normal.

LOL!

 

[oiprocs]

Originally posted by: Billyzeke
A right twisted wench from Caprees-ed
Orgasmed each time that she sneez-ed
To the druggist she went
And laid down her last cent
Said, "A barrel of snuff, if you pleas-ed."

Along came a druggie with a penchant for pot
Who smoked so much dope his lungs begged him to stop
He found the wench in the road
She smelled like snuff a la mode
With her asshole exposed and a cherry on top

 

[PepePeru]

I?m the sheriff here, there is no doubt.
No nonsense style is what I?m about
I could feel their dread
As I calmly said.
?Excuse me while I whip this out?

 

[oiprocs]

Originally posted by: G Wizard
I?m the sheriff here, there is no doubt.
No nonsense style is what I?m about
I could feel their dread
As I calmly said.
?Excuse me while I whip this out?

Everyone stood back and gasped real fast
Nobody could believe what had just passed
This Wizard took off his robe
Out came a big chode
And everyone started cracking like ass cracks

 

[Billyzeke]

There once was a plumber from Lee
Who was plumbing his girl by the sea
She said Stop your plumbing,
There's somebody coming!
Said the plumber still plumbing... It's me!

 

[SilentZero]

Nice guys..didn't know there was so much creativity in OT