AND HERE IT IS!! THE OFFICIAL:
BOOTY CALL AGREEMENT
This pre-booty call agreement (herein referred to as
the "Agreement")is entered into on the _____ day of
_________, 2002, between ____________ and
______________.
THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND
PRINCIPLES:
1. No sleeping over-unless it is very good and we need
to repeat it in the morning.
2. No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks
before the events of the evening.
3. No calls before 9 PM - we don't have anything to
talk about.
4. None of that "lovemaking" sh*t - only mind-blowing
sex allowed.
5. No emotional discussions - Examples: Where are we
heading with this? Do you love me? The answer is NO,
so don't ask.
6. No plans made in advance - that is why you are
called the "Backup," unless you are from out-of-town,
then it's only a one-time advance arrangement.
7. All gifts accepted - money is always good.
8. No baby talk - however, dirty talk is encouraged.
9. No asking for comparisons with former lovers -it's
really none of your damn business.
10. No calling each other "friends with privileges" -
we are not friends,just Sex Buddies.
11. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK -
don't be offended.
12. No extra clothing - I don't want your a$$ leaving
anything behind when you leave.
13. No falling asleep right after sex - it's over, so
get your a$$ up and go home.
14. Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it
- I don't care.
15. You cannot borrow my car for any reason.
16. If anyone asks who you are, the standard response
will be: "My roommate's girlfriend/boyfriend."
17. Doggie style preferred...... or get the hell out!
18. Reason for doggie style: the less eye contact the
better.
19. We hook up absolutely whenever the mood strikes ME
- so don't keep calling.
20. Bring your own drink - I am not your liquor store.
21. No phone use, please - don't want anyone calling
back looking for your a$$.
22. Please don't call me after you get home..I don't
want my next Booty Call picking up the phone.
* EXTRA TIP FOR SUCCESSFUL BOOTY CALLS:
The aforementioned rules may only be altered by the
holder of the agreement. If the other party attempts
to change or alter any terms of this agreement it will
automatically become null and void and you will then
be removed from the BOOTY CALL LIST and deleted from
phone memory and email list. BLOCKED from all
communications until your silly a$$ understands the
rules.
Participating Party -
Signature________________________
Date:________________
Participating Party -
Signature________________________
Date:________________