Printer problem at the office just turned into a major predicament...

Arcadio

Diamond Member
Jun 5, 2007
5,637
24
81
About 30 minutes ago I noticed that a couple of people were experiencing printer problems. A few minutes later one of the support specialists came up to see what the problem was. I thought that it was going to be something that could be fixed in a minute or so. After a few minutes more and more people started crowding around the printer, so I decided to check out what the big deal was...

It turns out that the printer is actually "swallowing" the paper. The paper is fed normally, but it doesn't come out. It basically vanishes. There is nothing visibly wrong with it. It just doesn't spit out the printed paper. The support guy checked it inside and outside and says that this shouldn't be occurring (duh). Everyone is perplexed by what is going on. For a moment everyone started sending test pages to see if their paper would disappear as well, until my boss came and told everyone to go back to their desks. Right now everyone basically stopped working and almost everyone is in one way or another wondering what is wrong. There is no easy way to see where the paper is going without disassembling the whole printer... there are like 8 or 9 people standing around the damn printer, including my boss. The printer is a Canon imageRUNNER 7095. I tried to download the manual to see if it says anything about vanishing paper, but it looks like the Canon Downloads website is down..

Some of my co-workers think the paper is jammed inside the printer somewhere, but right now that's an impossibility since there is no physical space for so much paper to fit in it. Some of the more superstitious co-workers think it's "possessed" or something like that. I don't know if they're joking... but one of those co-workers just left the office and said she was never coming back...

I really didn't want to get involved, but I did tell a couple of my close co-workers that according to quantum physics, there is a non-zero probability that the paper is disappearing from the office and reappearing somewhere else in the Universe, but that the chances of that occurring are extremely small, especially when it's not just one sheet of paper, but dozens... They acknowleged my comment but didn't say anything.


 

venkman

Diamond Member
Apr 19, 2007
4,950
11
81
I"m pretty sure this is how the second coming begins. Repent to the paper gods or be left behind!
 

Newbian

Lifer
Aug 24, 2008
24,782
845
126
A serious thread made by Arcadio....?

Now does this mean the VB switch might actually happen?
 

surfsatwerk

Lifer
Mar 6, 2008
10,110
5
81
I would open up the printer and start screaming, "Carol Anne - listen to me. Do NOT go into the light. Stop where you are. Turn away from it. Don't even look at it."
 

SunnyD

Belgian Waffler
Jan 2, 2001
32,674
145
106
www.neftastic.com
This thread was actually entertaining until Arcadio pretended to understand anything about quantum physics.

I say keep feeding it paper till it explodes. I truly don't think Canon is in the business of making stargates.
 

Crusty

Lifer
Sep 30, 2001
12,684
2
81
Originally posted by: SunnyD
This thread was actually entertaining until Arcadio pretended to understand anything about quantum physics.

I say keep feeding it paper till it explodes. I truly don't think Canon is in the business of making stargates.

I agree, if Arcadio would stop pretending to be an 'intellectual', people might actually take him seriously.
 

Arcadio

Diamond Member
Jun 5, 2007
5,637
24
81
Originally posted by: Crusty
Originally posted by: SunnyD
This thread was actually entertaining until Arcadio pretended to understand anything about quantum physics.

I say keep feeding it paper till it explodes. I truly don't think Canon is in the business of making stargates.

I agree, if Arcadio would stop pretending to be an 'intellectual', people might actually take him seriously.

So what should I tell my co-workers then?
 

Crusty

Lifer
Sep 30, 2001
12,684
2
81
Originally posted by: Arcadio
Originally posted by: Crusty
Originally posted by: SunnyD
This thread was actually entertaining until Arcadio pretended to understand anything about quantum physics.

I say keep feeding it paper till it explodes. I truly don't think Canon is in the business of making stargates.

I agree, if Arcadio would stop pretending to be an 'intellectual', people might actually take him seriously.

So what should I tell my co-workers then?

Nothing? Get back to work.
 

SunnyD

Belgian Waffler
Jan 2, 2001
32,674
145
106
www.neftastic.com
Originally posted by: Crusty
Originally posted by: SunnyD
This thread was actually entertaining until Arcadio pretended to understand anything about quantum physics.

I say keep feeding it paper till it explodes. I truly don't think Canon is in the business of making stargates.

I agree, if Arcadio would stop pretending to be an 'intellectual', people might actually take him seriously.

See, you on the other hand are fully qualified to talk about quantum physics, Mr. Timewarp master.
 

Crusty

Lifer
Sep 30, 2001
12,684
2
81
Originally posted by: SunnyD
Originally posted by: Crusty
Originally posted by: SunnyD
This thread was actually entertaining until Arcadio pretended to understand anything about quantum physics.

I say keep feeding it paper till it explodes. I truly don't think Canon is in the business of making stargates.

I agree, if Arcadio would stop pretending to be an 'intellectual', people might actually take him seriously.

See, you on the other hand are fully qualified to talk about quantum physics, Mr. Timewarp master.

:laugh:
 

Steve

Lifer
May 2, 2004
16,572
6
81
www.chicagopipeband.com
Originally posted by: surfsatwerk
I would open up the printer and start screaming, "Carol Anne - listen to me. Do NOT go into the light. Stop where you are. Turn away from it. Don't even look at it."

Do not go gently into that good night!
Rage, rage against the dying of the light!
 

nerp

Diamond Member
Dec 31, 2005
9,866
105
106
If the printer had a black hole in it, then maybe your theory would start to make sense. But then you all would get spaghettified and there would be no commotion around the printer. Just people trying to scream as they dissapear under the event horizon.
 

apac

Diamond Member
Apr 12, 2003
6,212
0
71
So basically ...

cliffs:
printer at work is broken
employees likely damage printer further with stupid intuition
 

FeuerFrei

Diamond Member
Mar 30, 2005
9,152
928
126
This morning my printer here at work started saying it is out of paper (isn't) and refuses to accept print jobs. Wonder if it's related?
 

fulltilt39

Golden Member
Aug 6, 2009
1,324
0
0
Originally posted by: FeuerFrei
This morning my printer here at work started saying it is out of paper (isn't) and refuses to accept print jobs. Wonder if it's related?

It probably is.

Reboot.

 

PottedMeat

Lifer
Apr 17, 2002
12,365
475
126
Just keep sending it print jobs, eventually it will start working again or start a fire.
 

AreaCode707

Lifer
Sep 21, 2001
18,440
101
91
I bet OT will pony up $100 for you if you grab something heavy and run screaming at the printer and start repeatedly bludgeoning it. Bonus if you find the missing paper in the smashing process.

[edit] Double bonus if you scream without any 'h' in your scream.
 
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