RANT: my parents suck. seriously.

[PowerEngineer]

Well, your parents may well be overprotective but they have our best interests (as they see them) at heart.

I imagine they are concerned that a serious relationship in high school might affect your decisions as far as where you go to college, etc. And few people really end up with their "high school sweethearts". You should also know that few of the high schoolers who've produced children started their relationships thinking that they would.

IMHO parents should be almost paranoid about sex, alcohol, and illegal drugs when their kids are in high school. These are the areas where teenagers can make mistakes that they can never recover from. In a few years, you will be on your own -- and hopefully up to making good decisions in these areas too.

Hang in there!

 

[fredtam]

Your parents are ok. Speaking from experience your "love" for your girlfriend can make you make really stupid decisions. The first "love" is most likeeely the one to do it too.

 

[thirdlegstump]

pray to Babaji!!!!!

 

[Ameesh]

seriously man, when you are sixteen you are a stupid n00b at life. you'll get smarter when you get to college.

 

[AgaBoogaBoo]

You've posted about this plenty of times and each time I've PMed you about it, you're even on my AIM list

I guess you're not taking my advice at all, seriously, try and look at other aspects of life

 

[z0mb13]

maybe ur parents will get u a wife sometime in the future

 

[AgaBoogaBoo]

DO NOT try and change your parents

They are doing what they believe is right. Maybe I realized it a little earlier, but they have reasons for what they're doing. Don't try arguing with them, all you do is make them feel like they made a mistake. Chances are your parents have argued about what they've done wrong and them blaming each other for any mistakes. Just listen to them for the time being, they're doing what they feel is right.

Sure, every family has some problems, but look at your parents. If doing what they did, they are successful today with a family, why take too many risks? Don't try and be TOO different than your parents.

 

[picardal]

Originally posted by: PowerEngineer
Well, your parents may well be overprotective but they have our best interests (as they see them) at heart.

I imagine they are concerned that a serious relationship in high school might affect your decisions as far as where you go to college, etc. And few people really end up with their "high school sweethearts". You should also know that few of the high schoolers who've produced children started their relationships thinking that they would.

IMHO parents should be almost paranoid about sex, alcohol, and illegal drugs when their kids are in high school. These are the areas where teenagers can make mistakes that they can never recover from. In a few years, you will be on your own -- and hopefully up to making good decisions in these areas too.

Hang in there!

Well Said.
Simply beware of having a kid and of having your life-long goals changed by the influence of your "love". I've seen many friends delay their goals because of mistakes caused by stupid decisions relating to relationships.
Your parents might be a little anal about the situation but you should also insist that they give you a rational explanation on why they are instead of letting them blow you off. Talking to them without getting pissed off should help

 

[MaxDSP]

around 16 years old and you have a gf, and an asian one at that. That's a double-whammy for your parents right there

Just gotta do what I (and many, many, MANY other Desis) do and keep everything discreet. What they don't know can't hurt them

 

[AgaBoogaBoo]

Also, do you really enjoy a girlfriend knowing your parents don't approve of it and that you have to hide it from them?

Just wait more time, they've seen MUCH MORE in life than you and I have, keep in mind I'm 16 too, but I realize they've seen a lot more than we have in life. Sure, we're in HS and see kids who do drugs and all daily, but our parents have seen much more in life regarding family issues, social issues, trends, how their parents were and how they are now, etc.

Honestly, I've been giving my advice to you everytime you post, but I'm getting to a point where there's no reason to help you out.

Just so you know, I'm Indian, my name is Ankit, I'm 16, and I'm in the US. We have quite a bit in common, hopefully you'll read what I wrote and give it consideration

 

[AgaBoogaBoo]

Originally posted by: MaxDSP
around 16 years old and you have a gf, and an asian one at that. That's a double-whammy for your parents right there

Just gotta do what I (and many, many, MANY other Desis) do and keep everything discreet. What they don't know can't hurt them

I hope they're worried about how it can hurt him and not them

secretanchitman: When you're ready to change a few things, let me know, I can understand your situation. I'd like to help you out, but only when I know you're going to try something rather than just let your emotions and thoughts get in the way

 

[MaxDSP]

Originally posted by: AgaBooga
Also, do you really enjoy a girlfriend knowing your parents don't approve of it and that you have to hide it from them?

Just wait more time, they've seen MUCH MORE in life than you and I have, keep in mind I'm 16 too, but I realize they've seen a lot more than we have in life. Sure, we're in HS and see kids who do drugs and all daily, but our parents have seen much more in life regarding family issues, social issues, trends, how their parents were and how they are now, etc.

Honestly, I've been giving my advice to you everytime you post, but I'm getting to a point where there's no reason to help you out.

Just so you know, I'm Indian, my name is Ankit, I'm 16, and I'm in the US. We have quite a bit in common, hopefully you'll read what I wrote and give it consideration

Fact of the matter is, if yours and his parents grew up in India, then their life experiences are going to be DRASTICALLY different than the ones Indian kids have in the US. I'm 23 and still get sh!t from my parents, mostly due to the fact that they still don't understand the way of life in the US, as far as growing up here goes.

 

[Excelsior]

ANGST.


It's cool, I had it once.

 

[HardcoreRobot]

Just because they are your parents doesnt mean they arent idiots. Im not saying necessarily that YOURS are, but 90% of the population is borderline retarded, and they have to be someone's parents. Mine of course are perfectly normal . It sucks, but its true. If they REALLY can not see eye to eye with you, and are resistant to any form of logic or reason, my recommendation is to get a job, save money, and stick it out till college. As soon as you don't need their money you can start to do things as you see fit.

BTW, since you are only ~16, don't take things so seriously. Nothing really matters yet.

 

[bleeb]

Originally posted by: alm4rr
sounds like Bend It Like Beckham!

 

[jai6638]

i know this sounds stupid but seriously, be thankful for what you have dude...... there are people out there who have problems worse than yours..

Originally posted by: athithi

Seriously though, you parents are just over-protective of you. I doubt that's something you will be able to change - ever! But don't cut your nose to spite your face. When you step out into the adult world you will face people that continue to try to make you do what they want you to do. And trust me, these people won't be paying for med school either. Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country. Obviously your parents' behaviour is not the ideal way to treat a youngster, but this is not permanent and soon you will be able to look after yourself. There are a lot of kids out there who are being brought up with problems that can never be corrected and that will cause them loss of opportunities throughout their lives.

I guess my point is that in the big scheme of things, that your parents don't approve of your having a girlfriend is something that will resolve itself with time, and very shortly too. Just don't do something stupid to spite your parents - you don't sound like someone that would, but I just had to say it.

EDIT: I met my wife when I was 18 and she was 17 - and I trust you when you say you are serious about your girlfriend. But if your love is enduring, you will learn to make it a part of your lives without disrupting everything else. Falling in love only encouraged me to do better things and become more successful. I hope you will learn to see it that way too.

a very sensible and mature reply..

 

[iamme]

Originally posted by: athithi
Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country.

a little high on ourselves, aren't we?

 

[jai6638]

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: athithi
Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country.

a little high on ourselves, aren't we?

whats wrong with what that?? it was a generalization so there would definately be exceptions..

 

[iamme]

Originally posted by: jai6638

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: athithi
Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country.

a little high on ourselves, aren't we?

whats wrong with what that?? it was a generalization so there would definately be exceptions..

it's a baseless, ethnocentric comment.

*shrug* if it makes you feel better, more power to ya.

if it's based on statistical evidence, then i respectfully recant that statement.

 

[Yolner]

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: jai6638

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: athithi
Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country.

a little high on ourselves, aren't we?

whats wrong with what that?? it was a generalization so there would definately be exceptions..

it's a baseless, ethnocentric comment.

*shrug* if it makes you feel better, more power to ya.

if it's based on statistical evidence, then i respectfully recant that statement.

Indian people and asian people are successful mostly because their parents teach them to work hard. You dont need statistics to see that. Most other minorities and many white people dont do as well because their parents just dont give a f.

 

[iamme]

Originally posted by: Yolner

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: jai6638

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: athithi
Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country.

a little high on ourselves, aren't we?

whats wrong with what that?? it was a generalization so there would definately be exceptions..

it's a baseless, ethnocentric comment.

*shrug* if it makes you feel better, more power to ya.

if it's based on statistical evidence, then i respectfully recant that statement.

Indian people and asian people are successful mostly because their parents teach them to work hard. You dont need statistics to see that. Most other minorities and many white people dont do as well because their parents just dont give a f.

hooray for more generalizations!

people who post on internet websites get all the ladies......see, i can do it too!

 

[Yolner]

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: Yolner

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: jai6638

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: athithi
Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country.

a little high on ourselves, aren't we?

whats wrong with what that?? it was a generalization so there would definately be exceptions..

it's a baseless, ethnocentric comment.

*shrug* if it makes you feel better, more power to ya.

if it's based on statistical evidence, then i respectfully recant that statement.

Indian people and asian people are successful mostly because their parents teach them to work hard. You dont need statistics to see that. Most other minorities and many white people dont do as well because their parents just dont give a f.

hooray for more generalizations!

people who post on internet websites get all the ladies......see, i can do it too!

Maybe but its the truth. I have lots of asian friends and know a few indian people and met some of their parents. They make damn sure their kids work hard and get somewhere in life.

 

[iamme]

Originally posted by: Yolner

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: Yolner

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: jai6638

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: athithi
Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country.

a little high on ourselves, aren't we?

whats wrong with what that?? it was a generalization so there would definately be exceptions..

it's a baseless, ethnocentric comment.

*shrug* if it makes you feel better, more power to ya.

if it's based on statistical evidence, then i respectfully recant that statement.

Indian people and asian people are successful mostly because their parents teach them to work hard. You dont need statistics to see that. Most other minorities and many white people dont do as well because their parents just dont give a f.

hooray for more generalizations!

people who post on internet websites get all the ladies......see, i can do it too!

Maybe but its the truth. I have lots of asian friends and know a few indian people and met some of their parents. They make damn sure their kids work hard and get somewhere in life.

sorry, it's NOT the truth. just your assumptions and generalizations.

if it were the truth, the only successful people you'd see are Indians and Asians.

 

[Chaotic42]

Wow, I used to get crap from my family for reading and stuff instead of having a girlfriend.

 

[RabidMongoose]

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: jai6638

Originally posted by: iamme

Originally posted by: athithi
Think of it as a small price to pay for the benefit of being born in an immigrant community that is among the most successful, law-abiding and talented ones in this country.

a little high on ourselves, aren't we?

whats wrong with what that?? it was a generalization so there would definately be exceptions..

it's a baseless, ethnocentric comment.

*shrug* if it makes you feel better, more power to ya.

if it's based on statistical evidence, then i respectfully recant that statement.

Actually if you base 'success' as economic success, then Indian Americans (and Asians) are one of the most succcessful groups out there...they earn far more than the national average...the same group also has high levels of college and postgraduate percentages.