Originally posted by: IHateMyJob2004
EDIT: Changed this to rant. I don't even care to talk about it. I am fed up pretty much.
Well .... we are 30 and 26. I'm 30. We have sex probably 6 times a month. WAY bleow average. And the sex sucks. She could care to discuss "spicing things up"
I have a 16 month old kid. he is awesome.
I think about divorce, probably 2-3 times a week.
I am fed up and am at the point where I'd rather be at work than at home.
My wife just knows how to piss me off sometimes, even though she doesn't always intend it.
To clarify. my wife is a stay at home mom. I bust my ass and the place is a damned pig sty among other BS errands she claims she needs to do when I am home. Tonight ... Friday night. She wanted to go fvcking grocery shopping. I can not stand it when she attempts sh!t like this. She has all day to shop and when I get home ... she decides she thinks it's time to go shopping. And yes, I have told her that all of this BS pisses me off.
Thoughts ...
Okay...I'll take your gripes one at a time.
1. Sex 6 times a month. Be DAMN glad you get it that much, with a 16 month old. Of course it's way below what you're used to, but this is normal. Women's sex drives tend to go down after having kids. Being around a baby all day doesn't tend to make them horny.
2. Your wife works, too. My guess is, it's MUCH easier to go grocery shopping WITHOUT the kid. In fact, that's a not a guess, it's a stone cold FACT. When you get home, your job isn't over...it's your turn to help. Get off your ass and help take care of your kid.
And be damn glad that you can have your baby's mother home, rather than putting the baby on some daycare assembly line.
3. The cleanliness of the house....I will agree with you here, unless you're some kind of neat-freak. No reason any stay at home parent doesn't keep the house clean. This is correctable, though.
4. You haven't given one legitimate reason to get divorced...not even close. Marriage and raising kids takes WORK. Staying home with a kid all day is WORK. Mom wants some time away from the baby, and it's your obligation to give it to her. You should WANT some time with the baby. If not, then you're not much of a parent, IMO.
Bottom line here is this: Communication. Yelling and fighting isn't communication, either. Either talk this out like adults, or get a counselor to help you do it.
What you're experiencing is completely normal and happens all the time....just most folks are mature enough to realize they don't need to divorce over things as trivial as this, particularly not when there's a child involved.