(Re)Tard Blog

[fs5]

Introduction to The Tard Blog:

This is a weblog written by a real life special education teacher.

It is updated on a irregular basis, because school is currently out.

And before you write us pissed off about this site, please educate yourself by reading the FAQ and Disclaimer. Most of your concerns are answered there.

http://fullduplex.org/tardblog/

 

[fs5]

#23: Tard gets sassy:

This morning, as all the kids were unpacking their things, I notices the old new kid was just sitting there, doing nothing. I said to him, "You need to unpack your backpack." His response to me- "You need to unpack your butt."

 

[Eli]

Originally posted by: fivespeed5

#23: Tard gets sassy:

This morning, as all the kids were unpacking their things, I notices the old new kid was just sitting there, doing nothing. I said to him, "You need to unpack your backpack." His response to me- "You need to unpack your butt."

LMAO..

 

[Atomicus]

Originally posted by: Eli

Originally posted by: fivespeed5

#23: Tard gets sassy:

This morning, as all the kids were unpacking their things, I notices the old new kid was just sitting there, doing nothing. I said to him, "You need to unpack your backpack." His response to me- "You need to unpack your butt."

LMAO..

I'd say beat some sense into them, but I think that didn't work the first time.

 

[paulney]

#18: Supermarket serves fresh tard:

I was going through frozen food section, when I see one of my tards on the other side of the freezer glass, mashed in between packages of frozen corn and peas. He was smiling and fogging up the window while beating on the glass and saying "Miss Hammon!" over and over.

I'm think to myself, "What a fvcked up supermarket--they serve frozen tard."

Bwhahahaha

 

[bradruth]

#17: Kunte still likes the bathroom:

Today Kunte asked me if he could use the bathroom. Since he hadn't already used all his bathroom visits, I let him. Once again, he spent a good 15 minutes in there, but I didn't hear any flushing or gurgling sounds. I knocked on the door and didn't get any response. Finally I opened the door to see what was going on.

Kunte was laying face down in the middle of the bathroom with his eyes closed. Immediately fearing the worst I rushed over to him to see if he was alive. As soon as I sat next to him and started looking for vital signs he sits up and looks at me. In a frantic voice, I asked him if he was alright, if anything was wrong. He smiled and said,



"No I was just sleeping."

"Sleeping?!?", I inquired, "If you needed to take a nap you could have asked to go to the nurse, why are you sleeping
in the bathroom".

"Because the tile is cool."

That made me smile.

 

[djplayx714]

its wrong for me to laugh this hard

 

[sniperruff]

#2: Tard likes stretchy things

"...Finally as we were lining up to leave he pulls down his pants and starts screaming.



This doesn't surprise me, as it is more common than one might imagine in a tard class. I go to hike his pants back up and ask him what was wrong. It was then that I noticed he had wrapped a rubber band around his penis several times, and that it was starting to turn purple.



I was fvcking floored. I walked him down to the nurse, where she removed it and I called his mother to tell her what happened.



I decided not to punish him, I think he's punished himself enough already."

sounds like a very abusive teacher, and is that supposed to help the mentally-challenged?

just for writing up a blog about "tards" and then be abusive to his students, maybe she himself is actually the tard herself

and yes it is pretty sad to laugh at the mentally-challenged. it is not like they want to be like that in the first place. you think they love to be that way? what would you feel if you are like them and have a teacher like that and get laughed at and prejudiced all the time?

i went to a school that shares the building with one of these schools and they were pretty sad. i've worked in a supermarket and they had a couple of the mentally-challenged people there, and i feel pretty bad whenever the manager get pissed at them.

everybody deserves some love and care from other people.

 

[Eli]

Originally posted by: sniperruff
#2: Tard likes stretchy things

"...Finally as we were lining up to leave he pulls down his pants and starts screaming.



This doesn't surprise me, as it is more common than one might imagine in a tard class. I go to hike his pants back up and ask him what was wrong. It was then that I noticed he had wrapped a rubber band around his penis several times, and that it was starting to turn purple.



I was fvcking floored. I walked him down to the nurse, where she removed it and I called his mother to tell her what happened.



I decided not to punish him, I think he's punished himself enough already."

sounds like a very abusive teacher, and is that supposed to help the mentally-challenged?

just for writing up a blog about "tards" and then be abusive to his students, maybe he himself is actually the tard

What the fsck are you talking about?

 

[dighn]

Originally posted by: sniperruff

sounds like a very abusive teacher, and is that supposed to help the mentally-challenged?

just for writing up a blog about "tards" and then be abusive to his students, maybe he himself is actually the tard

i think it's a "she"

He was smiling and fogging up the window while beating on the glass and saying "Miss Hammon!" over and over.

funny stuff but if real a little messed up

 

[fs5]

Originally posted by: sniperruff

sounds like a very abusive teacher, and is that supposed to help the mentally-challenged?

just for writing up a blog about "tards" and then be abusive to his students, maybe he himself is actually the tard

Read this: http://fullduplex.org/tardblog/tardfaq.html

 

[hjo3]

Originally posted by: sniperruff
sounds like a very abusive teacher, and is that supposed to help the mentally-challenged?

just for writing up a blog about "tards" and then be abusive to his students, maybe he himself is actually the tard

Read the FAQ and disclaimer.

Also: can't believe you guys just found out about this. I mean, it's good, but it's old. Had a link to it on my site a couple years ago.

 

[paulney]

Heck, you have to keep in mind, it takes a special kind of person to teach retards. Cut her some slack - I know, I wouldn't be able to hold up even for a day. 'Lots of patience' is a gross understatement here.

I don't think she is absuive; She's just writing about daily routine in the school in a humorous way.

 

[OutHouse]

Why do I have this archaic tard mutilation device you ask?

dude you just damned all of us to hell.

 

[Rainsford]

Funny stuff...and "giant tard pencils" as qutoed from the site, would be a good name for a band.

 

[sniperruff]

Originally posted by: hjo3

Originally posted by: sniperruff
sounds like a very abusive teacher, and is that supposed to help the mentally-challenged?

just for writing up a blog about "tards" and then be abusive to his students, maybe he himself is actually the tard

Read the FAQ and disclaimer.

Also: can't believe you guys just found out about this. I mean, it's good, but it's old. Had a link to it on my site a couple years ago.

i see. my fault for not reading.

but the word "tard" is pretty harsh and it is a slang. there are many other words that are not words but everyone knows what they mean.

 

[DrPizza]

Yeah, that site's VERY old... but very humorous.

I spent 8 years working with that population - I can tell you first hand that her experiences are far from unusual. And, teachers like her are VERY protective of their students, but about the only way to cope long term and blow off some steam is to realize just how humorous those every day things are. The burn-out rate for teachers working with the mentally retarded is pretty high - at least the burn out rate for those doing their jobs.

I wish I had kept a blog like that when I was working... the stories... 55 year old man lying on his back on the floor in the middle of the mall, stomping his feet and crying because he wanted to see Santa... another guy accidentally wheeling his wheelchair into the deep end of the pool at the YMCA - when all the staff rushed to his rescue, the other two adults in wheelchairs attempted to turn their chairs around to see what was going on - you guessed it... both of them into the pool too.

 

[dderidex]

Indeed:

I am a special education teacher. A lot of the parents don?t give a sh*t about their kids, especially the parents of special education students. I can say this because only about seven out of twenty parents actually come to their scheduled parent/teacher conference.

It is often a relief that some parents do not come. Coming up with nice things to say about their kids is always tough. Basically, I have to lie to their f*cking faces. I feed them with a load of BS. I do this for two reasons. First, I have so many negative things to say about them, that throwing in a positive every now and then alleviates the tension during these conferences. Second, I force myself to say nice things so the parents don?t go home and beat their kid?s ass. Seriously, this happens a lot where I work.

Only one of the parents showed up today to meet with me out of the six I had scheduled. And I am convinced that the only reason this mother showed up was because we have called Child Protective Services on her so many times, that she now fears losing her daughter, who is severely f*cked up, and she will be the mothers meal ticket for the rest of her God-Awful existence.

A few things you should know about this mother before I get into the content of the conference.

1) She works at AM/PM

2) She has two kids from 2 different fathers, and has never once been married.

3) She lives with her two kids in a large, low income-housing complex.

4) Her son is overall a nice kid, who I feel bad for because he has to play ?mom? to his younger sister.

5) Her daughter, who is in my class, was born addicted to crack-cocaine and with fetal alcohol syndrome. She is a cute girl, but can barely function. She knows about 25 words, two of which are ?Fooker? and ?Bitch?. I work with her on menial things such as drawing lines, signing colors, color recognition, and counting 1-3. She has severe behavior problems. She kicks, hits, screams, bites, etc. Mostly, this is due to her inability to communicate any other way. Still, it?s ridiculous.

And you wonder why I vote like I did on the "when did you give up on humanity" thread!

 

[MarklarMarklar]

2. A while ago, Jason ran into the cabinet full speed and fell flat on his back. I don?t consider this the cabinet?s fault, as Jason is a dumb **** and that?s what he gets for running around the classroom, but then the bottom drawer slid open and clocked the poor kid in the head while he was lying on the ground in front of it. It was almost as if the drawer was consciously punishing him.

LOL

 

[kermalou]

this is R to the Repost to the max, hasn't been updated in a while also...

 

[JustAnAverageGuy]

#13: Tard loses fight:

Angelo was walking towards the coat room today, when he clipped one of the classroom tables with his hip. Feeling slighted, he cursed at the table and swung his leg to kick the corner he'd bumped into. He missed the table leg by inches and sent his foot smashing into the underside of the table. He screamed and bent down to grab his toes, banging his head against the topside of the table.

At this point Angelo started crying, fell on his butt, and started trying to take his shoe off. He leaned forward to untie his shoe and hit his forehead against the edge of the table. After this he just curled up into a ball. I have never seen a tard lose a fight with an inanimate object quite as badly as this.[/quote]



http://fullduplex.org/tardblog/sa/1-11.htm is funny too.

 

[bugoox]

Haven't laughed that hard in a while

 

[screw3d]

I stand up to peer over the little bookcases and I see Joe, one of my fat tards, running around the tables with his shorts around his ankles and a paper-back book held firmly between his ass cheeks.

From here

LMAO!!! :laugh:

 

[Orsorum]

Old one, but one of the funniest sites evar.

 

[Sid59]

hahhahahah @ the unpack your butt ... that cracked me up