Serious family problems...Need Ideas

[Eeezee]

Originally posted by: KingofCamelot

Originally posted by: EeezeeI'd consider the other experiences more valuable, but I'm sure you could hold a good argument about that if you gave it a little effort.

First off, in the mock schedule you put up there you didn't leave much time for HW, chores, or other responsibilities. I understand your argument, but its still not healthy for the kid to be dedicating that many hours to a game. The other experiences are much more valuable. Instead of wasting his time playing a game that will get him nothing he should be playing sports, working, getting a girlfriend, join a club, whatever. Anything with more interaction with people in person would be good.

Also, I don't buy your argument that playing games that much is no different than playing sports that much, etc. Sports give you physical activity, social relations, and the chance for scholorships, etc. Games give you, brain stimulation, thats about it. Either way, variety is the key to life, the kid shouldn't be dedicating that much time to WoW.

I did homework in high school mostly at school. I wouldn't work on homework more than 30 minutes at home. The mock schedule was just the most extreme way to play, without any other activities, and you'd easily clock at 60+ hours/week. If you put 20 hours into homework and other activities, then you can understand how it is possible to average 40 hours per week and still keep up with other responsibilities.

Also, the reason players remain long after they've hit the level cap is for social interaction. Brain stimulation is an additional factor. Reading books would actually rank lower than playing games in this sense; reading books is 100% brain interaction and doesn't even have the social interaction that you can find in a MMORPG.

 

[OneOfTheseDays]

Please OP, do not listen to the advice of many of these avid gamers. They are addicted as well, and they offer no insight to your problem.

Playing video games for 40+ hours a week is definitely excessive and your brother will most likely develop serious social problems later in life if he doesn't learn to find other activities. My suggestion, cancel his WOW subscription and ban him from playing. Hang out with him and try and do things that you know he'd be interested in, your his big bro after all.

 

[SagaLore]

I think when people dedicate that much time to role playing games they start to develop a 2nd personaltiy based on that role. Sounds like if Blizzard were ever to shut down WoW he would be in a world of hurt.

 

[SagaLore]

Does he work? Is he paying for the broadband service and WoW subscription?

 

[Eeezee]

Originally posted by: Sudheer Anne
Please OP, do not listen to the advice of many of these avid gamers. They are addicted as well, and they offer no insight to your problem.

Playing video games for 40+ hours a week is definitely excessive and your brother will most likely develop serious social problems later in life if he doesn't learn to find other activities. My suggestion, cancel his WOW subscription and ban him from playing. Hang out with him and try and do things that you know he'd be interested in, your his big bro after all.

Would you say the same if he were reading books 40 hours a week instead? :disgust:

It is the fact that we had these addictions and beat them that makes our advice so much more valuable than yours.

 

[bucwylde23]

I was addicted to BF2 up until a month or so ago, and I finally was able to break away from it. Bought a 360 to play as an alternative, which meant that I couldn't play as often. (wife has shows she HAS to watch some nights)

I also think I have carpal tunnel which makes my hand/wrist ache after playing bf2 or doin anything on the comp after a short period of time.

I go outside a lot though and have tons of work to do around the house so that helps keep me busy and not inside playing games. It is also hard during the winter to find other things to do. Now that summer is here, it's much easier to find things to do outside.

I still play 360 a lot, but sometimes its only like 6-10 hours a week, if that.

 

[Pepsei]

i asked my wife, she's done drug counseling before. at anyrate, he's got a serious addiction personality. one form of treatment is to shift that addiction to something else that's harmless.

you know how alcoholics goes to AA all the time? that's shifting the addiction from alcohol to social meetings.

is he a virgin? maybe turning him into a womanizer would be better than playing WoW all the time....

 

[pontifex]

uh...parenting...uninstall the game and take the cds
he's still in HS, he still lives under your parent's roof, THEY need to do their job as parents and fix this. who pays for WoW? set the parental controls on it.

 

[JDrake]

:laugh:

 

[Udel]

I hope you work out your family problems. But when I read the title I lol'ed a little inside.

 

[IdaGno]

Originally posted by: Eeezee

Originally posted by: fritolays
find him a girlfriend

he will be in puppy love and will forget about WoW altogether

QFT, if you could pull that off it'd be the best possible solution

trading one addiction for another is not the answer - something about "balance in all things"

 

[BKLounger]

i may be way off base here but why not either just infect the computer with a virus or maybe break the computer and it has to go into a computer shop for a long while. That will buy you some time to get him through withdrawals and reintroduce him to society

 

[gigapet]

cancell broadband at the house. That should put a damper on his wowing. Then cancel his subscription. Then put a sledg hammer thru his monitor.

 

[j00fek]

Originally posted by: KLin
Format c:

Your brother seriously needs help. Preventing him from getting on the computer is the first step.

:thumbsup:

 

[Spineshank]

40 hours? Holy crap i only play CS maybe 10 hours a week max and i think thats a lot. While the kid sounds like he has some sort of issue he doesnt sound too bad. However if parents (general not singling yours out) would discipine their kids better instead of letting the kids boss them around he would be fine.

 

[SpiderWiz]

Honestly, you are only the brother. It has to be your parents that correct this problem. I wouldn't take the suicide threat lightly, but I'm guessing he said that to get your parents to back off. There are several good suggest of what your parents can do to change his behavior. But the key is your parents must do this not you. I understand you are concerned but comes down to action from your parents.


You can talk to him as a equal and try to explain your parents side to him.

 

[DaShen]

Originally posted by: Sudheer Anne
the only solution is complete withdrawal from that stupid game. you really think your brother can tone down his hours.......please that is complete and utter bs and it will not work.

you all need to intervene and get this kid outside and doing some other activities. sports, theater, whatever........get him out of the house and interacting with real people.

QFT...

Plus, the kids sounds really spoiled and EMO. Suicide vs. Counseling. :roll: Your dad needs to beat some sense into the kid. If that isn't an option, it is your duty as the older brother to seriously kick his ass. I am not kidding.

Also, your parents need to put the computer in their bedroom, so that he only gets to play the game when your parents aren't sleeping. Your sister sounds a little bratty as well, but she is probably a lot younger.

After the ass kicking, you should take him out to do something with a group of friends. Like sports or pool, or an amusement park. Delete WOW from the computer and close his account. Of course he will overreact, but your brother needs a reality check.

I have been there myself. I used to play Tribes, Starcraft, and pool almost all the time non-stop. I would skip meals, sleep, and school. It took a complete jarring of my grades to make me realize how poisonous that can be. Don't let him get into the same situation because it will drsticaly affect his life by then.

 

[Lazy8s]

My bro went through this and even failed classes. We got him into counseling and I tried to explain to him how sad the people that do this are. I play a couple or 3 hours a day of video games but the second a RL issue comes up I may not game for weeks, and I make it clear to whatever guild I'm in. the thing to realize is games come second...no not even second, they come last and everyone playing should understand; if they don't screw them.

 

[DaShen]

Originally posted by: dopcombo
If I were in that situation, I would throw him out of the house, and ask him to get some fresh air and think about what he's doing to his family. Who should he be more responsible to? If he says WoW instead of the family, then stop feeding him, giving him allowances (if he still gets any), and stop paying for anything he has to pay for.

Start collecting rent, and making him realise how much the family is taking care of him.

It depends on how independant the kid is. But if the kid is playing WOW all the time instead of working and being responsible, then this will work.

 

[EngenZerO]

Originally posted by: KLin
Format c:

Your brother seriously needs help. Preventing him from getting on the computer is the first step.

seriously. remove the game, stop paying for his account... and definitly make him see a counseler... worst case... commit him.

 

[erikistired]

tell your parents to try parenting for once and take some control of their house. if i'd pulled this crap when i was a kid my dad would have kicked my ass, with the computer! kids these days are idiots.

 

[batmang]

Originally posted by: KLin
Format c:

Your brother seriously needs help. Preventing him from getting on the computer is the first step.

if your brother lives at home, as in, with your parents, have them cancel the internet. <---
that will make him stop instantly, get him to see a shrink. hes definitely got a problem.

 

[Fraggable]

You're not his dad and don't have the authority to kick him out or do anything major with his life, considering he does have and live with both parents.

I wouldn't recommend looking at the situation like it's yours to fix. Just help your parents deal with it by making it very very difficult for him to play the game. Your parents are the ones who are letting him do it and apparently have failed in disciplining him. If they're so stupid they can't deal with it, then that's just sad.

If it's necessary, send him to a funny farm to keep him from comitting suicide.

 

[SP33Demon]

I play WOW in an end game raiding guild about 3-4 nights a week for 4 hours on those nights. So it comes out to roughly 16hrs a week. I still do a ton of other things like the gym, martial arts, and drinking with friends. So I think anything over 25 hours a week is way too excessive, your brother has a huge problem.

What I would do is only allow your brother to participate in raids or whatever, 5 hours a day for 4 days max. Let him pick the 4 days he wants to play (hopefully his guild has a set raiding schedule, if not then he needs a new guild). The other 3 days (or when bro isn't on) the family can do their thing. I think 20 hours a week is fine, and should give him time to do other things. The hardest part will be forcing him to get the f off the computer after his time is up. It sounds like he has an addictive personality, and he needs guidance in balancing his time.

If he doesn't comply, then send the motherfcker to boot camp, they will take care of his punk azz.

 

[SP33Demon]

Originally posted by: batmang

Originally posted by: KLin
Format c:

Your brother seriously needs help. Preventing him from getting on the computer is the first step.

if your brother lives at home, as in, with your parents, have them cancel the internet. <---
that will make him stop instantly, get him to see a shrink. hes definitely got a problem.

Cutting him off isn't going to solve sht. He'll just go to a friend's house who has internet and play there. He may even retaliate against the family, who knows what he'd do.