Should I buy more $200 jeans?

[Sumguy]

I decided to take a trip to the mall today and took our good friend JMapleton's advice: buy sexy $200 jeans and all the ladies will love you for your sheik and daring style! I sat and pondered where great minds flock to buy their overpriced denim apparel. Thankfully, I live in Miami, where there are plenty of rich people who love to waste their money. There's a Bloomingdale's on damn near every corner if you go to the right part of the city.

I began my journey with this:

Clearly unflattering! My buttocks are not accentuated by the fit of these jeans! And they only cost $15 from Old Navy! How grotesque. Women will not have their potential suitors running about in thrift store goods.

I decided to look for good old Seven For All Mankind: helping men get laid since Western culture decided jeans are awesome and should be worn all the time. It wasn't hard, as they had an entire wall of these jeans. Apparently, $200 jeans fly off the shelves faster than the horde of women can tear them off of the men who buy them.

Behold!

The tag said "standard". As I pulled this from the "straight leg" section, I assumed the pair I grabbed are for those who are not yet ready for the awesome power that comes with chicken legs and skinny jeans.

They lied. I felt the nut-hugging goodness cradle my manhood. And it felt nice. I guess the deceit was for my own good. But alas, no swarm of women were yet swooning over my swang. Obviously, I'm doing it wrong.

I decided to listen to our old friend Casiotech. They had a few pairs of Diesel jeans in the store. This time, I struck a pose. Women dig men in douchewear striking poses, right?

Nope. I sat alone in the dressing room, not a crazed female in sight.

I'm confused, JMaptelon, how does this shit work?

 

[JMapleton]

I'm confused, JMaptelon, how does this shit work?

Firstly, you have to post about it on the internet.

Then the women come next.

But bravo job! At least you gave them a chance.

 

[Sumguy]

Firstly, you have to post about it on the internet.

Then the women come next.

But bravo job! At least you gave them a chance.

My nuts hated me for it. Wasn't too bad until I sat down. Holy shit dude, how do you do it?

 

[JMapleton]

My nuts hated me for it. Wasn't too bad until I sat down. Holy shit dude, how do you do it?

And these were in the standard?! Not even the Slimmys?

Do you have like 5 nuts or something?

 

[AznAnarchy99]

I like some slimmys but I have big calves and they will never fit me.

 

[Sumguy]

And these were in the standard?! Not even the Slimmys?

Do you have like 5 nuts or something?

You mean you dont? :hmm:

 

[IceBergSLiM]

This discussion has gotten ridiculous. Girls don't like Fabio types anymore. They like skinny hip guys. Hipsters. Cool guys. Interesting guys.

You must be over 30 because you're living in the past.

hipsters aren't cool or interesting.

didn't you get the memo?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVmmYMwFj1I&feature=player_embedded

 

[JMapleton]

hipsters aren't cool or interesting.

didn't you get the memo?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVmmYMwFj1I&feature=player_embedded

I smell some jealousy.

 

[ShawnD1]

hipsters aren't cool or interesting.

didn't you get the memo?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVmmYMwFj1I&feature=player_embedded

Cool video. Forwarded to my hipster friend

 

[alkemyst]

i think if Fabio showed up, any chick would be all over him.

 

[ShawnD1]

Here's a fun game. With safe search ON do a google image search of "sexiest man".

Mine shows this as the first result. Seems appropriate. Looks nothing like a hipster.

I tried the same thing with "sexiest girl" and "sexiest woman" and it still returns a ton of porn results. Oh internet, you card ^_^

 

[thraashman]

This discussion has gotten ridiculous. Girls don't like Fabio types anymore. They like skinny hip guys. Hipsters. Cool guys. Interesting guys.

You must be over 30 because you're living in the past.

If by girls you mean the 14 year olds you are aiming for, then yes I agree. Most women I meet like men, not scrawny little boys. Then again I like women (females over 18) not girls.

 

[rcpratt]

And these were in the standard?! Not even the Slimmys?

Do you have like 5 nuts or something?

The bootcuts strangle my nuts pretty good, too...I'm not sure how those compare to standard.

It's rough actually having legs and nuts :whiste:

 

[IceBergSLiM]

I smell some jealousy.

of?

 

[AznAnarchy99]

The bootcuts strangle my nuts pretty good, too...I'm not sure how those compare to standard.

It's rough actually having legs and nuts :whiste:

Yea I cant do boot cut or skinny just because of that.. Its gota be standard for me. My pair of sevens are standard and I love em. Most comfortable jeans ever.

 

[disappoint]

Sure, and you can use a Monster cable as a belt too.

 

[AznAnarchy99]

Sure, and you can use a Monster cable as a belt too.

Belts from Giorgio Armani since I get 50% off.

 

[Sumguy]

Belts from Giorgio Armani since I get 50% off.

Brings it down to a reasonable $75?

 

[JSt0rm]

i bought a Atelier Ladurance belt that should last 40 years. My belt is a dark brown.

 

[Oil]

Well, I did it; I bought a pair of 7s. I was at an outlet mall today and came across a 7 outlet store. Tried on a few on a few pairs of bootcut and standard styles. The standard cut felt like they were strangling my balls, and they apparently only come in button fly (WTF?). The bootcut jeans I bought came out to $109 before tax, well below the original price of $200. IMO, the jeans aren't worth the retail price of $200 and I'm not even sure they are worth $109, but I purchased them to test them out and give ATOT my honest opinion of them.

May god have mercy on my soul

 

[JMapleton]

Well, I did it; I bought a pair of 7s. I was at an outlet mall today and came across a 7 outlet store. Tried on a few on a few pairs of bootcut and standard styles. The standard cut felt like they were strangling my balls, and they apparently only come in button fly (WTF?). The bootcut jeans I bought came out to $109 before tax, well below the original price of $200. IMO, the jeans aren't worth the retail price of $200 and I'm not even sure they are worth $109, but I purchased them to test them out and give ATOT my honest opinion of them.

May god have mercy on my soul

That's seriously awesome.

Which wash did you buy? What was the name?

 

[Suspicious-Teach8788]

I completely understand wanting nice clothes. I have several pairs of $200+ jeans, $100+ shirts, etc. I also have several other very nice things but most people aren't made aware of it. Anyone who has to brag about shit like this is a little pathetic and doesn't really have money... they are the thirty-thousand-dollar millionaires.

Also, if JMapleton has so much money, why even ponder whether or not to get $200 jeans, especially when they are on sale? My wife bought me 3 or 4 pairs of Rock and Republic jeans without asking anyone about it. Hell, I bought a $70K summer car without asking anyone on a message board or even my wife, really.

My thought is that this clown doesn't really have much money otherwise he wouldn't need to seek validation. Chump.

sorry, but within designer jeans rocks look good on women. they look awfully gay on men. sevens are a lot better for men if you don't want a flashy R on your ass.

 

[Oil]

That's seriously awesome.

Which wash did you buy? What was the name?

I have no clue. I'll check when I get home later in the week

 

[JMapleton]

I have no clue. I'll check when I get home later in the week

Let us know!!!!!!!!!

 

[JSt0rm]

lol.