AA is BS.
It is a religious program, plain and simple. The fact that they changed the wording some years ago to a "spiritual" program doesn't mean a thing. It's all based on God.
"Chapter To The Agnostic"
Not, "Chapter For The Agnostic". Its a chapter that lectures you and says you are doomed if you don't find a higher power. Wait, Higher Power. They always capitalize it as if it should be a proper name, aka God.
AA says you are powerless and doomed without God, plain and simple. I'm glad the courts finally figured that out. (No, I have never been ordered or asked to go to a program by courts, but I see them come in with their papers all the time.)
Yup, I used to drink too much. Why? Anxiety. Why do I go? Because it's a great way for me to deal with my anxiety issues. Where else can I go and sit with a rotating group of strangers to deal with my anxiety problems? Cognitive behavioral therapy at its finest. No, I don't share. No, I don't put money in the basket. (Doesn't church pass a basket?)
If you want to recover from a drinking problem you DO need support, but not in the demeaning way AA provides it. Go to an SOS, Lifering, and AA meeting. The differences:
SOS and Lifering: after the meeting you will feel like you just left a Tony Robbins seminar.
AA: after (and during) the meeting you will want to down a 12pack and slit your wrists.
If you want to quit drinking, great. But find a support group and talk about why you are drinking. Once you figure out why, you will be much closer to finding out how to stop.
*********************** INTERMISSION ***********************
I can say that in the last two+ years I've been going to groups in this area the following facts. (these are meetings with around 50-60 people)
1. Only about 10 have stayed sober. (and of those, they all have at least 10 years of sobriety.)
2. Others have attained many years, only to go out drinking again.
3. Most stay around for less than six months. Some come back, some don't.
4. The ones that preach the "word" the most seem to get drunk the most.
5. AA is run MUCH differently in different areas.
It is not a disease, it is an addiction. Be it physical or mental, it is an addiction. When is the last time you heard somebody say they had "the disease of smoking"? (And, from what I hear, smoking is harder to quit than drinking.)
If I hear "we have an allergy to alcohol" one more time I will scream. Where anybody came up with that I have no idea, but talk about misinformation. Has anybody even picked up a dictionary to see what an allergy is? Obviously not.
To sum up, because I am through with this topic...
If you go to AA don't try arguing any of the above points with them because they are brainwashed. It's like trying to debate the bible with a Christian. (Nothing against Christians, I think everybody has a right to choose their religion, that's not what my rant is about.)
Ask anybody in AA and they will tell you that you cannot succeed without a HIGHER POWER. (If they say it can be a doorknob, my personal favorite that they use, I just laugh. Please... tell me how a doorknob is a higher power?)
/rant OFF
P.S. Did anybody see the episode of Dexter when he was thinking to himself "Oh great, another whining loser complaining about something that has nothing to do with alcohol. How long is this meeting going to go on? When is this meeting over, hell its already been (looks at watch)... oh great, only 5 minutes."
That about sums up AA meetings.
************************ TO THE OP ************************
Find something that works for you, if it's AA I'm not going to talk you out of it. Just be aware that there are other choices. You say you wake up craving a drink, your body is physically addicted to the alcohol right now. Whatever you do, if you are that addicted don't stop without proper medical advice/care.
Good for you if you recognize that its a problem and deciding to do something about it. If there is anything I learned from sitting through meetings, its that it really will ruin your life if you don't deal with it.
I wish you great luck and success.