So my girlfriend is going to see her ex tonight.... *UPDATE 3*

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Howard

Lifer
Oct 14, 1999
47,982
10
81
Originally posted by: WarDemon666
I hate the bastard. I let him see my GF a few times after we started going out, just because I am so kind hearted and wanted my gf to be happy, and most of all, free....

But theres this one time, the bastard went and started grabbing her ass, tried touching her tit's.... She told him to leave right away, and cried all night, I got home after work at 12:00, she was waiting for me at the door, practically crying, and told me what happened. I was ready to go back to his house and beat the living sh!t out of him. She told me not to, and that she would never talk to him again cause hes a dumb as$, and she hates him...

Its been about 5 months + now, and they have been talking for a while... They were going to go to the movies together (the last time I saw them at the movies (i knew her b4 going out with her) they were making out the whole time and didnt see the movie) but this time my gf has to stay home to babysit, so hes coming here, and they are "supposed to play games"..


I now have to go to my parents house ( dial up, and I have to fix 3 computers this weekend... )

I trust her, but I dont trust him.

What should I do? she told me if I dont want I can tell her, and she wont let him come, but I want her to be free!! Is it worth it?

What would you guys do?

*UPDATE* see post further down I dont wanna copy paste

*UPDATE 2* see the other post further down... jk.

We talked everything over, for over 3 hours. She read this whole thread, and we came to one conclusion: we both love each other, and I stated that the only reason I CARE that she sees him is because I hate the guy. I hate how hes a liar, and untrustworthy. His gf doesnt know about any of this. I suggested to my gf that I talked to him, and told him how I felt. She said it was a good idea. She said she is going to stop seeing him for now, but what happens if she has the urge to see him again? A while back she tried blocking him from her life, twice actually, but it never worked. She doesnt know why. She says its because of the way he makes her feel. He makes her feel desireable, and she likes that. Of course I do the same, but she says its nice to have someone else feel this way, that doesnt see you when you get up etc( i think shes beautiful even in the morning with her hair all messed up! ) So she says she is going to try and find out why she wants to see him so much, and were going to try and overcome this problem.. Its not the first time this issue has come up.. There are other guys she hangs out with, that she danced with etc, and I couldnt care less if they saw each other again.... I trust her with other people... Its just him I dont trust. Hes an unworthy bastard...

Well, everything was said, now I just have to wait to see what happens next... We wont break up, at least I dont think we will. She knows exactly how I feel now, and I know how she feels. After reading, and remembering the things he has done to her, she told me she doesnt know why she still sees him. She knows hes an asshole etc, but she just says its nice for him to think im desirable, it makes me feel good... I guess I can understand her, If you have a girlfriend, and other girls keep coming up to you, thinking you're one hot piece of ass, it makes u feel good no?

Anyways, ill keep you posted to see what happens when she talks to the ex boyfriend..

BTW, she told him that I was going to be here, and he said "well, i can't come anyways,, im sick.. Stupid cold..." or something of that manner,, so we had the night to talk...It felt good to talk about how we feel, at least now we both know how I feel when she sees that guy..

Ill keep you posted, ATOT family...
Owned.
 

OrByte

Diamond Member
Jul 21, 2000
9,302
144
106
about time you updated correctly.

So, in her own words...she is saying that she likes the fact that other people desire her?

well....


at least she is being honest. Doesnt sound ready for a serious, and committed relationship. But what do I know...
 

vtecluder

Banned
Dec 7, 2004
268
0
0
Originally posted by: p0ntif
You showed her this thread? WTH?

Can't you explain it on your own?

I can picture it now:

WARDEMON: "Hey babe, we need to talk. Actually it's easier if I just show you."
soontobeEXgf: "um, all these people are calling you a pansy and a wuss."
WARDEMON: "yeah, but I KNOW you still love me and its not your fault, its that ex of yours."
soontobeEXgf: "Hmmm. Yeah, you don't realize how attractive I find your spinelessness, I just didn't realize everyone else was laughing at you too. Tell ya what, let me talk this over with my Ex so I can figure out why I'm still attracted to him. You just sit here and try to pretend to be a man."

I can't beleive you showed her this thread.

LOL
 

TuxDave

Lifer
Oct 8, 2002
10,571
3
71
You gotta step up and be a real man to your gf. Enough of this 'I want her to be free' garbage. All that got you was a gf who needs some ex-bf to make her feel desirable.
 

mobobuff

Lifer
Apr 5, 2004
11,099
1
81
Originally posted by: Nebor
I for one think you did the right thing. Macho overreactions don't build lifelong relationships, they only ruin them.

:beer: :thumbsup:

It seems every idiot spouting useless non-advice in this thread is exactly the same, either putting their shit in lists...

1) OMG I"M SO COOEL AND YOU ARE AN IDIOTH!
2) I put stuff in lists because I cna't have coherent thought!!
3) holy shit my third idear!
4) You are so totllay noobular!
5) OMG womynz are so crazy and will gobble on that dick all over OMG! you suck

or pretend to predict some sort of future like some bastardized Miss Cleo...

Oh holy shit I can see it now LOL!!
WARDEAMON: OMG I"M IN SO MUCH PAIN BECUZ I DIND"T FOLLOW THE ADVICE OF COOL PEOOPLS!
WARDEAMONGIRLFREND: OMGWTF I LUV CAWK!!
WARDEAMON: I HRRT!

But my guess is they're all 14 year olds who've never had an actual girlfriend, or any sort of relationship that's lasted longer than a few months.

So keep doing what you're doing, if things don't work out, fuck it, you tried and you didn't quit and forfeit like a little bitch. You handled your shit like a man, don't forget it.
 

flexy

Diamond Member
Sep 28, 2001
8,464
155
106
Originally posted by: MegaWorks
She's only with you for the sex, but her heart is with the other guy.

So dump her

i'd say the other way around.
 

TuxDave

Lifer
Oct 8, 2002
10,571
3
71
Originally posted by: mobobuff
Originally posted by: Nebor
I for one think you did the right thing. Macho overreactions don't build lifelong relationships, they only ruin them.

(something that I can't get past the ATOT censor)

The fact that he to realized that he should tell her if something's bothering him rather than to be okay with everything is a sign to me that we must've told him something right.
 

InterpolAgent

Member
Dec 7, 2004
133
0
0
She's going to cheat on you, I guarantee it. I've seen this done to friends many times before. If she loved you, then there would be no point in seeing him.
 

TheBDB

Diamond Member
Jan 26, 2002
3,176
0
0
She says its because of the way he makes her feel. He makes her feel desireable, and she likes that.

You better get her addicted to your johnson, or she will leave you for someone else.
 

SOTY

Junior Member
Nov 19, 2004
18
0
0
No matter how much of a jerk her XBF is/was, the fact is they have a history together.
Believe it or not, there probably were reasons why your GF really liked him? Probably things that are more difficult to see or even explain, cause you actually never 'went out' with the guy. You never got emotionally attached to him.

If your girlfriend is wanting to see him as a friend, I hate to say it, but the chances are very slim that she and he can be friends. Of course, she doesn't want to believe that probably, because she's a nice girl, wants to give her XBF a chance to be friends. Though I speak from experiance for myself and many of my friends in similar situations, that the chances are pretty slim that he and she can be outright friends with nothing else going on. You're a guy, you know what her XBF is prob thinking half the time, he's thinking 'man, would I really like to get back together with this chick, and even do the wild thing with her'. If your girlfriend can't see this, she obviously doesn't really understand guys all that well.

I think the only time where the chances are better that he and she can be truly friends is if they BOTH move on, that's right I said BOTH. He's gotta find(and fall in love) with some new chick, and your chick, needs to get her emotions in the right place, namely 100% in your direction. Only then do I think they could re-approach to a friendship.

Now, it also may mean that you might need to do some soul searching on your end to determine if you've got a balanced relationship with your girl. You may need to consider how you approach the relationship 'emotionally'. Cause generally girls pick up a lot more on 'emotions', and if she has a guy who is in touch with his emotions, and portrays from that a strong emotion for her, it will help cement things.

I'm not saying go around in drag dude, but maybe consider how you approach your relationship with her on the 'emotional need' level.

Good Luck.
 

arcenite

Lifer
Dec 9, 2001
10,660
7
81
Stop being a little pansy and tell the b!tch where to stick it (after you got done sticking it there). Then go and find a girl who isn't a ho.
 

moshquerade

No Lifer
Nov 1, 2001
61,504
12
56
Originally posted by: InterpolAgent
She's going to cheat on you, I guarantee it. I've seen this done to friends many times before. If she loved you, then there would be no point in seeing him.
THIS IS ALL THAT NEEDS TO BE READ IN THIS THREAD!

 

91TTZ

Lifer
Jan 31, 2005
14,374
1
0
I think it's funny how some people occasionally reply and claim that they see nothing wrong with what she's doing. It's as if they're not able to read the writing on the wall. I've known guys like this, who were completely oblivious to what's going on. One guy I knew, his girl hung out with some other guy, slept over his house, and even went on vacations with the other guy. My friend honesly couldn't see it. Later when she finally saw no need for him and dated the other guy full time, my friend got mad at me because I felt no sympathy for him.

When you walk into traffic and get hit by a car, it's your own damn fault. You should have seen the situation coming.
 

jvarszegi

Senior member
Aug 9, 2004
721
0
0
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
I think it's funny how some people occasionally reply and claim that they see nothing wrong with what she's doing. It's as if they're not able to read the writing on the wall. I've known guys like this, who were completely oblivious to what's going on. One guy I knew, his girl hung out with some other guy, slept over his house, and even went on vacations with the other guy. My friend honesly couldn't see it. Later when she finally saw no need for him and dated the other guy full time, my friend got mad at me because I felt no sympathy for him.

When you walk into traffic and get hit by a car, it's your own damn fault. You should have seen the situation coming.

A sucker is born every minute.
 

TStep

Platinum Member
Feb 16, 2003
2,460
10
81
Originally posted by: WarDemon666
*UPDATE 2*
After reading, and remembering the things he has done to her, she told me she doesnt know why she still sees him. She knows hes an asshole etc, but she just says its nice for him to think im desirable, it makes me feel good... I guess I can understand her, you have a girlfriend, and other girls keep coming up to you, thinking you're one hot piece of ass, it makes u feel good no?
-------------------------------------------------------

Do you remember the last time you sliced you finger with a razor blade? Did you go back for more, I doubt it. Apparently, what ever your SO is claiming are bad things this guy has done to her are not so bad that she is repulsed to not want to see him. In fact she's going back for more, explain that?

Seems to me that you are the one in the way of their relationship and they have the strong attraction with a few issues that need to be worked out. To feel statisfaction that another human makes your feel desirable is one thing, to overtly act upon it in when you are in a solid relationship is something else. Wake up, they are attracted to eachother, that is why seeing him IS desirable to her. You're just a port in the storm. You're 19, By all means enjoy the pooosy now, but you need to start looking for a new garage to park your car in.
 

Koing

Elite Member <br> Super Moderator<br> Health and F
Oct 11, 2000
16,843
2
0
Originally posted by: WarDemon666
Originally posted by: FoBoT
dump her and find a new gf

My gf isnt the problem, shes really nice and caring, she would never do anything with someone else, the other guy is a fvcking lying as$hole..

I talked to him the other day on the net:
me: "Hey, i heard youre gonna see my gf this weekend"
him: "naw, no time, have too much stuff to do, for the next month"
me: "oh ok"

next day:
gf: "*hisname* still wants to come over tomorrow, he just lied to you because he thought I wasnt going to tell you"

stupid lying bastard. His new GF that he has now doesnt know anything about what he did with my gf a while back, I was going to tell her, but I didnt wanna be an as$hat

WHY the hell IS YOUR GF going to EVEN bother to see him AFTER lying to you like this?! SERIOUSLY wtf is she thinking?

I mean if he was not such scum let her see him. If she wants to cheat on you SHE WILL.

And you NEED to trust your gf. SURELY she isn't so defenseless that she can't walk away from this guy or at least punch him or kick him in the nads when he makes a move towards her right? If not I would thoroughly recommend her some self defense class's. If this other guy is such a clown why is she going to see him? Some people just need some sense...

And DUDE why are you letting ANYONE see her AGAIN after grabbing your gf's ass and boobs? I'd be out for bl00d if he would 'come' over again. NO ONE does that sh!t to my gf. I probably would advise against kicking his ass as the law doesn't look kindly on people kicking people's ass. But I'd definately not allow him to be near my gf.

Koing
 

Tarrant64

Diamond Member
Sep 20, 2004
3,203
0
76
Bump...

And dump her already man. I was on your side, but dude, your just not seein' it are you?

Don't let them play you.
 

Pacfanweb

Lifer
Jan 2, 2000
13,149
57
91
Originally posted by: TheBDB
She says its because of the way he makes her feel. He makes her feel desireable, and she likes that.

You better get her addicted to your johnson, or she will leave you for someone else.
Obviously he isn't doing much for her; She'd be throwing rocks at the ex if he was.
 

BD2003

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
16,815
1
81
I dont think I can read another second of this. This is like every bad ATOT YAGT rolled up into one.

1) He's a pussy
2) He lets his GF walk all over him.
3) Her GF is somehow different from every other girl
4) He trusts her no matter how much she stretches and mangles that trust
5) His GF would never, ever cheat on him.

And the cliche of all cliches

6) No matter what ANYONE says, even if there is a massive consensus, the OP will hold on to any single shred of post that agrees with him, and ignore the other 99% that tell him he's wrong.

I cant take it any more.

And to his GF, if youre still reading this... You should be fvcking ashamed of yourself. Don't say you love him out of one side of your mouth, and then disrespect him in the worst way possible out of the other side. Stop being a selfish little b*tch, and have some god damn respect for yourself.

Its a good thing neither of these people are friends of mine, because as a friend, I'd be yelling at both of them at the top of my lungs for being such god damn pricks.

She's probably not cheating on you, YET. But you dont need to *ask* her why she still has feelings for him. Its cause your a damn pussy. Youre not a man, and her ex is. Some women like assholes, very few like pussies, but ALL women like a *MAN*, plain and simple.
 
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