EDIT#2: I think i was more attached than anything else...?
EDIT#1: Ultimately, i hope she regrets her decision one day.... I hope so........ and then thinks back to the good times we had and how i treated her right.
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So after spending $2000 on this girl and driving every week to pick her up, treat her right, sending roses to her workplace, and surprising her with little gifts every now and then, I am left in the dark... She broke it off with me in 5 days after we got together. I cannot believe she pulled this stunt on me.. I'm sort of disappointed in her decision because i truly did like her and i would've done anything for her, yet she still didnt' feel the same way about me. I'm soo bitter...
And worse of all, i didnt' even kiss her yet. But perhaps it was better i didnt' kiss her because it might make me even more attached? Ladies, can you please shed some light on this issue about the kiss?
Here is the email she sent me.
Hi. I'm thinking you probably don't want to talk to me right now, so
that's why I'm writing you an email. I feel really awful that you
didn't get any closure from our conversation last night, so I'm going
to try my best to give that to you. I don't really know where to
start, so I'll just use Waterfront Hilton because that seems like a good
reference point.
Like I said last night, I really wanted to like you as more than just
a friend, so that's why at Waterfront I said we were dating and not
just friends. I guess I did lead you on from that point and it's
really just selfishness on my part. I wanted to keep dating you
because you're everything I look for in a guy. Unfortunately, there
are very few people like you out there and because of that, I honestly
thought that if I just let you go I would never find someone as
genuinely nice as you. I already knew, before you told me, that you
would do anything for me, which made staying with you even more
appealing. It amazed me that someone can actually like me that much
and I liked that (not that I'd ever had the intention of telling you
to do stuff for me).
I actually contemplated on whether or not to just be your girlfriend
and hope that as time progressed, I could see you as more than just a
friend. But that would just be evil of me to make you like me even
more and then break it off (in the event that my feelings didn't
change towards you). I don't think you fully understand just how much
I want to get over the "seeing-you-as-just-a-friend" hump. The sad
thing is, there's really nothing you nor I can do to change that. I
just want to tell you that, literally, it's not you but me. I know
you think 'how can I see you as just a friend when we weren't close
friends to begin with', but I don't think people have to be great
friends to see one another as just a friend.
I apologize for hurting you, wasting your time, and deferring you from
your school work. I really liked going out with you and if it seemed
that I wasn't excited about
going out with you, I apologize for that too. I'm also sorry for
making you backtrack on your 3 goals for the year. I know you
probably have all these walls built now for the next girl to break
down and I'm really sorry to put you in that position.
Per our conversation last night, I did indeed tell your friend that I never
had a boyfriend because I can't see myself with only that one guy.
However, I don't think that applies to you because it's not the 'being
solely with you' that comes to question, it's seeing you as a romantic
partner, not just a friend. I know you want an explanation as to WHY
I can't see you as more than just a friend. But the truth is, I just
can't...there is no explanation. I think there's just this barrier
that's blocking the chemistry between us. There are no secret hidden meanings behind what I
say.
I don't know what else to say. You can accept what you want from this
email. I hope reading this doesn't make you even more
mad/disappointed/bitter/upset because that would defeat the whole
purpose of closure. I hope you get your broker license...take care
and don't go changing because you make a great boyfriend just the way
you are.
~NAME HAS BEEN REMOVED TO PROTECT THIS WITCH
So what does this letter mean? Does this letter make her sound even more of a money grubber/selfish gal or perhaps i'm wrong about her?
I really don't want to let her go though.. she's sooo special to me. i love everything about her from the way she laughs, talks, cuteness, cleanliness, personality... she is soo observant as well.. her intelligence, grace... i also love how she has this cute grin when she misses a shot after playing pool... i love how she is so sweet at times... but she pulls this stunt on me out of nowhere... i just realized she wasn't the cute bunny in the cage, but more like a snake... :brokenheart:
should i not give up on her and still pursue this issue or just drop it? i feel like if i dont' give it my ABSOULTE all, i'll lose a good thing in my life... her.