Originally posted by: Pliablemoose
Fred walks into his house with a sheep tucked under his arm. He carries it upstairs and into the bedroom where his wife is in bed, reading a magazine.
"Honey," says Fred, "This is the pig I've been screwing when you're not available."
"Fred," the wife says, "That's not a pig. That's a sheep."
"Shut up," says Fred. "I wasn't talking to you."