Stuck in a tough spot between a job offer and a dream job interview

[badchoice]

I originally planned to rescind on the offer if I get my dream job, but it turns out that I won't be able to do that. I tried to extend the job offer deadline but the hiring manager called me and I'd have a hard time doing anything unethical like rescinding my acceptance.

The job offer deadline is before the final round interview of my dream company and role located in a dream city. The job that I have an offer for is located in a city that I don't want to live and the salary is quite low, but I'm unemployed and the experience can be useful. I'm just not sure how long I'm willing to work there for low pay in an undesirable city. Do I turn down the offer for a shot at a dream company+job+location? There's obviously the risk of coming up empty-handed and struggling to get anything else for months.

 

[Ns1]

Do you see that? It's the bridge burning behind you.

 

[Rakehellion]

coming up empty-handed and struggling to get anything else for months.

This. Do this thing.

 

[JulesMaximus]

So, what is stopping you from going on the dream job interview?

Take the other offer and go on the dream job interview anyway. If they make you an offer you are fine with then just quit the other job.

 

[Rakehellion]

So, what is stopping you from going on the dream job interview?

Take the other offer and go on the dream job interview anyway. If they make you an offer you are fine with then just quit the other job.

And ask both for a raise.

 

[badchoice]

So, what is stopping you from going on the dream job interview?

Take the other offer and go on the dream job interview anyway. If they make you an offer you are fine with them just quit the other job.

The two companies are located in opposite coasts. I'm located where the dream job is and have to relocate to the other side if I accept the other position.

So you're saying accept the offer, go to the interview, relocate to the opposite coast (find housing and lease a car or something), then quit after a week or so if I get the dream job offer?

 

[DaveSimmons]

It sounds like that's what you want to do. It's your life, we can't decide for you.

 

[JulesMaximus]

The two companies are located in opposite coasts. I'm located where the dream job is and have to relocate to the other side if I accept the other position.

So you're saying accept the offer, go to the interview, relocate to the opposite coast (find housing and lease a car or something), then quit after a week or so if I get the dream job offer?

You didn't explain that in your original post. How soon can you get the interview lined up for the dream job? How soon do they expect you to relocate across the country and start working for this other company?

Man, why would you move across the country to a place you don't want to live, earning wages that are below your pay scale...

I get contacted all the time for jobs in places like Michigan or Missouri but I don't even bother reaching out to these people. No fucking way I'm moving to either of those places.

 

[Rakehellion]

You were planning to quit anyway.

 

[Safeway]

The two companies are located in opposite coasts. I'm located where the dream job is and have to relocate to the other side if I accept the other position.

So you're saying accept the offer, go to the interview, relocate to the opposite coast (find housing and lease a car or something), then quit after a week or so if I get the dream job offer?

Accept the job, interview with the dream job during the time that they provide for you to find a place to move, etc. They pretty much have to give you a couple of weeks to a month to relocate. That's standard fare. They surely don't expect you to start the next fucking day.

 

[cabri]

The two companies are located in opposite coasts. I'm located where the dream job is and have to relocate to the other side if I accept the other position.

So you're saying accept the offer, go to the interview, relocate to the opposite coast (find housing and lease a car or something), then quit after a week or so if I get the dream job offer?

How many interviews have you had for the DREAM slot?

How far after the offer deadline is the final DREAM interview?

Much depends on your professionalism here.
Until you actually show up and the company has spent $$ on you; you can then easily back out, unethically or not. Once $4 have been spent; then it becomes more dicey; you will be expected/required to refund the amounts spent for relocation costs.

Let your POC know in the DREAM slot that you have this situation and try to get their process expedited.

If they can not do it; then either gamble or take the job on the other coast.
If you take the job, then are contacted by the DREAM, let them know that you were very interested, however, because of their process, you could not wait for a resolution.

If you are willing to jump back; then continue following the DREAM process.
If not; explain that you have a obligation to stay on the coast for a period of time. If they would like you at that time, you would be pleased to communicate with them.

 

[cabri]

You didn't explain that in your original post. How soon can you get the interview lined up for the dream job? How soon do they expect you to relocate across the country and start working for this other company?

Man, why would you move across the country to a place you don't want to live, earning wages that are below your pay scale...

I get contacted all the time for jobs in places like Michigan or Missouri but I don't even bother reaching out to these people. No fucking way I'm moving to either of those places.

Cost of living and a chance to interface with RudeGuy. Also, 6 months of snow to play in.

 

[badchoice]

You didn't explain that in your original post. How soon can you get the interview lined up for the dream job? How soon do they expect you to relocate across the country and start working for this other company?

Man, why would you move across the country to a place you don't want to live, earning wages that are below your pay scale...

I get contacted all the time for jobs in places like Michigan or Missouri but I don't even bother reaching out to these people. No fucking way I'm moving to either of those places.

I tried to have the dream job interview this week but the scheduling for the team didn't seem to work out. The interview coordinator mentioned a date next week instead after looking at everyone's calendars and I didn't want to seem too pushy so I am just going to wait for the confirmation as mentioned in the email to me.

I'm not sure when the hiring manager of the other company wants me to start. We haven't discussed it yet but I'm assuming it will be 2-3 weeks from now.

I highly prefer to not move across the country but I'm unemployed and it appears that job openings are becoming more scarce as we enter the summer season.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Cost of living and a chance to interface with RudeGuy. Also, 6 months of snow to play in.

You're not exactly blowing my skirt up.

I know my wife wouldn't want to move to either of those places.

 

[badchoice]

So based on the posts, it appears that accepting then rescinding is still the best course of action instead of gambling on all or nothing

Didn't want to do it after the hiring manager called me and we spoke D:

 

[JulesMaximus]

So based on the posts, it appears that accepting then rescinding is still the best course of action instead of gambling on all or nothing

Didn't want to do it after the hiring manager called me and we spoke D:

Well, it's not ideal but you owe it to yourself to at least try to get the best possible outcome for you. A company won't hesitate to lay people off, they feel no sense of loyalty to you when looking at their bottom line so why should it be any different for you?

 

[Safeway]

So based on the posts, it appears that accepting then rescinding is still the best course of action instead of gambling on all or nothing

Didn't want to do it after the hiring manager called me and we spoke D:

Fuck it. It doesn't matter who you talked to. Ask for a month to get your affairs in order, to locate an apartment, and to move. That gives you ample time to shoot for the moon. If you get the job, say that the move isn't going to work after all. If you don't get the job, move.

 

[rcpratt]

I get contacted all the time for jobs in places like Michigan or Missouri but I don't even bother reaching out to these people. No fucking way I'm moving to either of those places.

Aaand fuck you very much.

 

[MrDudeMan]

Accepting and then quitting before you start is dick move in a big way. Speaking as an employer, that shit is a huge waste of my time and, more importantly, it's really just a scumbag way to do business. Put the risk on yourself, not someone else, because it's your risk, not theirs. If I hire you and subsequently turn down other candidates, I'm most likely not going to get them back if you quit two weeks later, which means I have to waste another very significant chunk of time interviewing again. Anyone who recommends or even defends this practice is just as much of a jerk as anyone who does it.

I routinely post online to let other employers know about this kind of behavior. More than once another employer has contacted me to say thanks.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Accepting and then quitting before you start is dick move in a big way. Speaking as an employer, that shit is a huge waste of my time and, more importantly, it's really just a scumbag way to do business. Put the risk on yourself, not someone else, because it's your risk, not theirs. If I hire you and subsequently turn down other candidates, I'm most likely not going to get them back if you quit two weeks later, which means I have to waste another very significant chunk of time interviewing again. Anyone who recommends or even defends this practice is just as much of a jerk as anyone who does it.

I routinely post online to let other employers know about this kind of behavior. More than once another employer has contacted me to say thanks.

WAH!!! Employees don't have my best interest at heart!!! WAH WAH WAH!!!

Be happy you have a good job and stop pissing on other people who are simply trying to get the best for themselves. Talk about a dick move... posting online about a complete stranger who turned you down, basically black-listing them, that's a dick move. Now you're interfering with another person's ability to make a living. Congrats.

 

[MrDudeMan]

WAH!!! Employees don't have my best interest at heart!!!

I don't expect them to have my best interest in mind. I expect them to do what they say they're going to do after I make a significant commitment by offering employment. My paycheck depends on my ability to do work just like yours, except I have to shoulder way more risk because people often don't understand how much time it takes to interview. I've worked at a big company and the time is both easier to absorb and less impactful on a personal level, but small businesses are completely different. If you accept my offer and then fuck me over, it prevents me and anyone in a similar position from going home at a reasonable hour for days or weeks at a time. I have to interview 10 people and that takes at least an entire day. I have to spend at least 30 hours reading resumes to find 10 good people to interview and none of this can be done during the workday because clients don't give a shit if you need to hire - they still need their stuff done quickly. Accepting and then declining can cause this entire process to restart.

It's not pissing on someone else to tell them to take their own risks. That's some entitled bullshit if I've ever seen it. Also, it's really pretty easy to avoid being 'blacklisted' as you put it - mean what you say when you accept and consider other people's time before you make false commitments.

All it takes is honesty. "I'm considering another job, but I'm still interested in yours." I still offer jobs to people who say that, but I also keep my other options open by letting them know the situation. Everyone has real information and everyone can do what's best for themselves on their own time. If you're too much of a dick to afford someone the right to know what's going on, then I'm well within my rights to let others know. I've had references tip me off and I always send them a gift card. There's enough decent people to not need to waste time hoping someone who idiotically burns bridges has changed.

If you really don't understand why agreeing to work for someone and then not showing up or quitting before you even start is a dick move, I don't know how else to explain it. With that said, I rarely have this problem because most people have the decency to do the right thing in my experience. Bad apples are thankfully few and far between when it comes to electrical engineers, at least in my particular area of expertise.

 

[OverVolt]

Accepting and then quitting before you start is dick move in a big way. Speaking as an employer, that shit is a huge waste of my time and, more importantly, it's really just a scumbag way to do business. Put the risk on yourself, not someone else, because it's your risk, not theirs. If I hire you and subsequently turn down other candidates, I'm most likely not going to get them back if you quit two weeks later, which means I have to waste another very significant chunk of time interviewing again. Anyone who recommends or even defends this practice is just as much of a jerk as anyone who does it.

I routinely post online to let other employers know about this kind of behavior. More than once another employer has contacted me to say thanks.

I think its come up several times... but I hope I never work wherever it is that you work.

 

[badchoice]

MrDudeMan, what would be your advice in my situation?
Should I tell the hiring manager that I'm waiting to complete a dream job interview and to look for other candidates in the meantime? Would the hiring manager be understanding? I highly doubt it as I seem uncommitted.

How about I start work and if I do get the offer, quit after one month and take the dream job? Is that preferred? If I were already working at the moment, I would never do this.

 

[Anonemous]

Just do what you gotta do. There is no company loyalty. The crappy/dream job employer could potentially call you the day before you even start the position and just let you go since there was no room in the budget. Posted a thread about this some years back.

 

[AznAnarchy99]

Do what's best for you. If you get the dream job then quit the shitty one. They're already offering you a low salary so you already know what they think of you.