Tales from the IT world...

[IHateMyJob2004]

Originally posted by: child of wonder
Actual ticket.

(names altered to protect the stupid)

NOW WHAT'S GOING ON WITH MY EMAIL???

Yesterday afternoon I tried to send an email to Bob Johnson with scans of two letters to the FDIC, one was 2.33mb and the other was 2.17mb.......I got an error message and had to send TWO separate emails to get the letters to him.

Now I'm trying to send an email to Wendy Williams with a Notice of Levy......she needs to get this TODAY! It's 4.95mb and the error message says it exceeds my limit of 2.44mb. This just started happening yesterday afternoon after Tim Meadows said he changed the capacity of my email account because I'm constantly getting that message about exceeding capacity.

THESE THINGS NEED TO BE RESOLVED! THIS IS HOW WE COMMUNICATE WITH STAFF AND OTHERS...BY EMAIL AND ATTACHMENTS. THESE CONSTANT ERROR MESSAGES ARE A TOTAL WASTE OF MY TIME AND PREVENT ME FROM DOING MY JOB. I WORK FOR THE REGIONAL PRESIDENT, I'M CONDUCTING THE BUSINESS OF THE BANK. PLEASE GET THESE ISSUES RESOLVED ONCE AND FOR ALL.

I don't get it. Where is the part about here being stupid?

 

[AkumaX]

Originally posted by: RedSquirrel

Originally posted by: 2Xtreme21
Had a user call the helpdesk complaining her internet was slow. The helpdesk tech remoted in to her pc (because they can, and they do even if they don't need to) and told her he thinks her docking station is causing the issue. Ticket is forwarded to us, I head down, she's adamant that her dock is causing her internet to be slow. Mind you, it's slow, but she has Google Toolbar, Yahoo Toolbar, Random buttfuck toolbar, 9 instances of IE open, firefox open, and she's surfing at lunch time where 2000 (literally) other people are surfing as well. I tell her I can speed it up for her and attempt to remove the toolbars, to which she snaps at me saying how dare I touch her "work tools" and to just "replace the damn dock."

I politely explain that her dock has no bearing on internet speeds and it's the multiple web browsers she has open, the unsanctioned software she's running, and the fact that she's surfing at lunch time that would slow her browsing speeds down. She says she doesn't have time for it now, that she'd call my supervisor, and she'd see me later. Yesterday I get a call from my big big boss who's located in Indiana (I'm in PA) telling me to replace her docking station.

-_-

LOL I can totally see that. People will FIND things to complain about, even though they need to pick a certain time such as "rush" hour where the internet is slow. I've seen the exact same thing, someone with like 20 tool bars insisting that they NEED them to work.

she's probably going to restart her computer after the new dock, and say "SEE I TOLD U IT WAS THE DOCK"

 

[randomlinh]

Originally posted by: DisgruntledVirus
I do believe that would be upper management logic more likely.

The IT dept would want it as high as possible without causing too much network bandwidth issues.

No, IT logic would be not to use email to send files to each other.

 

[Jeff7]

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
While I agree that the user's tone is terrible, in all honesty, it's rather ridiculous to limit attachment sizes to 2.44mb today. A simple expense report with scanned receipts can be larger than that. I understand that you may not set policy, but whoever set the 2.44mb limit is living in the past.

ZV

Bah, drop the file into a photo editor (I like GIMP), go to grayscale, adjust the Levels, convert to B&W, and save as PNG. Files goes from 2MB+ to <100kB.


....and then the person you're sending to doesn't know how to open PNG files.
(Yes, that's happened quite a few times. For some reason, some of the campus PCs don't know what app to use to open PNG files.)

Originally posted by: StinkyPinky
The Fire Dept would probably prefer they don't burn to death looking for a switich in dense smoke

Hell no. Retrieving corpses is a lot easier than trying to rescue a living person.

"Oh no, the structure just collapsed while we were trying to pull a dead body out! I sure hope he didn't break any bones."

Originally posted by: pontifex
and why 2.44 mb? seems like an odd number. ours here are set to 5 mb.

Another possibility: "We have X bandwidth and Y employees. Bandwidth per employee = X/Y."

 

[trmiv]

Originally posted by: Saulbadguy

Originally posted by: StinkyPinky
In my experience the worst jobs are the imaginary ones that users are never satisfied with. Such as "my pc is running slow" when it isn't and nothing you do will convince them everything is ok.

I used to get that crap a lot.

I still get that a lot. The best thing to do is click around the screen for awhile, uninstall and reinstall an update of some sort, and then reboot. Tell them that you installed an update that should make things quicker and to have them let you know if it continues.

Yea I've used that one many times.

I just got an urgent ticket from user that wants help putting her battery in her laptop. How hard is that, really? How do these people function away from work?

 

[sourceninja]

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt

Originally posted by: child of wonder
Actual ticket.

(names altered to protect the stupid)

NOW WHAT'S GOING ON WITH MY EMAIL???

Yesterday afternoon I tried to send an email to Bob Johnson with scans of two letters to the FDIC, one was 2.33mb and the other was 2.17mb.......I got an error message and had to send TWO separate emails to get the letters to him.

Now I'm trying to send an email to Wendy Williams with a Notice of Levy......she needs to get this TODAY! It's 4.95mb and the error message says it exceeds my limit of 2.44mb. This just started happening yesterday afternoon after Tim Meadows said he changed the capacity of my email account because I'm constantly getting that message about exceeding capacity.

THESE THINGS NEED TO BE RESOLVED! THIS IS HOW WE COMMUNICATE WITH STAFF AND OTHERS...BY EMAIL AND ATTACHMENTS. THESE CONSTANT ERROR MESSAGES ARE A TOTAL WASTE OF MY TIME AND PREVENT ME FROM DOING MY JOB. I WORK FOR THE REGIONAL PRESIDENT, I'M CONDUCTING THE BUSINESS OF THE BANK. PLEASE GET THESE ISSUES RESOLVED ONCE AND FOR ALL.

While I agree that the user's tone is terrible, in all honesty, it's rather ridiculous to limit attachment sizes to 2.44mb today. A simple expense report with scanned receipts can be larger than that. I understand that you may not set policy, but whoever set the 2.44mb limit is living in the past.

ZV

and why 2.44 mb? seems like an odd number. ours here are set to 5 mb.

I couldn't live with anything less then 10 meg. I have reports that need to be sent to people off site that are 8-10meg pdfs.

 

[AreaCode7O7]

Originally posted by: StinkyPinky
In my experience the worst jobs are the imaginary ones that users are never satisfied with. Such as "my pc is running slow" when it isn't and nothing you do will convince them everything is ok.

I used to get that crap a lot.

I just tell them, sympathetically, "yeah, our company is really cheap and buys crap computers. Everyone's machine is like that."

 

[sdifox]

Originally posted by: MotionMan

Originally posted by: loki8481

Originally posted by: zixxer

Your datacenter doesn't have any kind of battery backups? The power for your datacenter is controlled by an easily accessible switch in a warehouse?

my data center has a master power switch... basically turns the entire building down, generators or not. I assume it's standard, though putting it right out in the open on a loading dock is pretty retarded... ours is under shatter-proof glass near an emergency exit in a hallway that sets off an alarm if anyone even walks 3' into it.

if the entire building is going up in flames and all hope is lost, the last person running out of the building should flip the switch.

Why?

MotionMan

your gear might survive if they were not on when dosed by water/foam.

And like other said, a lot safer for the firefighters, though they are supposed to cut master power, you might have ups/automated backup generator.

 

[sourceninja]

Our red button was in the server room. Out in the open and unprotected. I put a big sign on it that said "Push me, you know you want to". A week later it was moved and placed inside a plastic box.

 

[AreaCode7O7]

User: "How do I get <web app> in the stars?"
Me: "What?"
User: "I need it in the stars so I can find it."
Me: "Um, can you show me?"
User opens a site out of Bookmarks in IE 7
User: "See? How do I get it in the stars?"
I bookmark the site for her.
Me: "So you can bookmark any site you want."
User clearly doesn't retain the information.
Me: "How do you go to your favorite websites on your home computer?"
User clicks the the URL drop down to display the most recently visited pages.
User: "They're all listed here."
Me: "When you're home you only visit the sites listed there?"
User: "Yes."
Me: ...


"Do I have to click Save to save the information?"

VP User: "Why can't I have an Apple instead of a frking Windows laptop?"
Me: "Well, the company has them but none of the <department> third party applications we use for all our document management and other daily work are compatible.
VP User: "So?"

Working in HR was a war about color ALL the time. I'd run a report and highlight the requested information and wind up with repeated color requests. "Can we change the highlighting so it's not red? That's so confrontational, like they did something wrong." "Peach is too light." "Pink isn't urgent enough." "Green makes it too hard to read the text." "Yellow hides the highlighter marks (from printing it out and using a marker on it." Gah!

 

[AreaCode7O7]

Originally posted by: her209
User's reason for getting admin. rights on his computer: He's a vet that spent 3 years getting shot at in Vietnam.

My dept users had admin rights on their machines til about three months ago (heheh!) and my favorite two experiences were:
1. Finding WoW installed on a work computer
2. Telling complaining teammate that THAT's why nobody should have admin access and he says, "yeah, but I can't even download bitTorrent on my computer now!"

/facepalm

 

[AreaCode7O7]

Originally posted by: bobdole369
"they never bothered to power cycle the printer. "

Why are you using a piece of equipment that must regularly be power cycled to operate correctly? Why would you not replace this hunk a junk with something that does work?

You've clearly never had to purchase a heavy duty printer for a large department. No matter what you buy they're all pieces of junk. Sucks because every time I have to buy something new I hold out the futile hope that maybe there's a single functional printer that won't make my life an ongoing hell "because it should work, it's brand new!" but it doesn't.

 

[Deviant Grasshopper]

Originally posted by: AreaCode707

Originally posted by: bobdole369
"they never bothered to power cycle the printer. "

Why are you using a piece of equipment that must regularly be power cycled to operate correctly? Why would you not replace this hunk a junk with something that does work?

You've clearly never had to purchase a heavy duty printer for a large department. No matter what you buy they're all pieces of junk. Sucks because every time I have to buy something new I hold out the futile hope that maybe there's a single functional printer that won't make my life an ongoing hell "because it should work, it's brand new!" but it doesn't.

I swear I think it's to force people into maintenance contracts.

 

[xSauronx]

Originally posted by: AreaCode707

Working in HR was a war about color ALL the time. I'd run a report and highlight the requested information and wind up with repeated color requests. "Can we change the highlighting so it's not red? That's so confrontational, like they did something wrong." "Peach is too light." "Pink isn't urgent enough." "Green makes it too hard to read the text." "Yellow hides the highlighter marks (from printing it out and using a marker on it." Gah!

jesus,i would have "run out of color toner" after the second one of those. what a headache.

Originally posted by: sourceninja
Our red button was in the server room. Out in the open and unprotected. I put a big sign on it that said "Push me, you know you want to". A week later it was moved and placed inside a plastic box.

awesome.

 

[Jeff7]

Originally posted by: AreaCode707
Working in HR was a war about color ALL the time. I'd run a report and highlight the requested information and wind up with repeated color requests. "Can we change the highlighting so it's not red? That's so confrontational, like they did something wrong." "Peach is too light." "Pink isn't urgent enough." "Green makes it too hard to read the text." "Yellow hides the highlighter marks (from printing it out and using a marker on it." Gah!

:laugh:

I got 9/9 on a homework assignment recently. It was written in red ink. I'm not sure if I should be scared or upset. Red is just such a downer.


Maybe these people shouldn't have done so .......OMG, the spell-checker in Firefox underlined something in RED. WWAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

Anyway, maybe these people shouldn't have done so poorly in school; now they've got a Pavlovian response to the color red.

 

[trmiv]

There are two things that drive me nuts (OK, way more than two, but these are the only two I'm typing out right now)

I hate when you go to work on a users computer and they hover, staring at what you're doing asking questions. "Oh what did you do there? What are you installing?" Just shut up and let me work!

But I also hate when you go to work on a user's computer and they frigging disappear! You need them to sign back in and they are no where to be found. The best thing for them to do is to either get their spare chair and sit outside their cube, or go chat with a co-worker. Leave me alone, but don't disappear!

 

[BornStar]

User: I closed a document and clicked No when it asked me if I wanted to save. Can you recover that information?
Me:

 

[MotionMan]

Originally posted by: trmiv
There are two things that drive me nuts (OK, way more than two, but these are the only two I'm typing out right now)

I hate when you go to work on a users computer and they hover, staring at what you're doing asking questions. "Oh what did you do there? What are you installing?" Just shut up and let me work!

But I also hate when you go to work on a user's computer and they frigging disappear! You need them to sign back in and they are no where to be found. The best thing for them to do is to either get their spare chair and sit outside their cube, or go chat with a co-worker. Leave me alone, but don't disappear!

1. At least they are interested in trying to learn what to do next time so they do not have to bother you again (not that any of the information ever sinks in).

2. When you arrive, you should tell them to hang around. I could see that, if someone could not work on their computer for a while, and that is the only way they can get any work done, they would take an unscheduled, uncharged break.

Either that or ask them for their login and password when you arrive.

MotionMan

 

[ric1287]

Originally posted by: BornStar
User: I closed a document and clicked No when it asked me if I wanted to save. Can you recover that information?
Me:

ohhhh I love that one.

User: Don't you guys make backups!!!!!
Me: Yes...but if you tell it not to save, there is no backup....

 

[sourceninja]

My favorite IT experience happened a few months back. I work at a college and we use moodle for online classes. Some faculty members (not from the IT departments but the language departments) wanted to have a bunch of features that were not on our time table. Before going any further in this story, you need to know that we have no microsoft servers on campus. Everything is solaris, novell, or linux. The last microsoft servers were replaced about 3 years ago.

So these two professors approach us and tell us that they have setup moodle on their own computer and that it was easy to do. They tell us they can configure it to do exactly what they want and do all the testing for us so all we will need to do is put it online. My boss decides to humor them. His reasoning being if we can get them to at least do some testing, it would improve our development timelines. We inform them that we do not use windows, and they will need to use a server setup similar to production so that we can know for sure any modules they choose will run in our environment. They assure us this is no problem and that they can do it. So I create them a virtual machine, put or standard linux build on there, create them an account with sudo privileges and send him an email with the information. I then place my bet on how long it will take for this project to fail.

About a week goes by without any comments. Finally he starts asking questions.

1) How do I get to the server?
2) Can I be allowed access to the server room?
3) Where is the desktop?
4) How do I get my files on the server?

So I introduce them to ssh and scp. I explain our servers are headless and do not run 'desktops'. Some of them do support X11 and he could set that up over ssh, but it is beyond the requirements for this job. Another week goes by, my boss comes to see me. He has just be told that "Linux is an inferior system to microsoft. It is unbelievable that any system would consider itself professional and require you to learn and type in commands. How can they be expected to modify the code without a desktop?" They also could not get any permissions right, they were unable to copy files into the proper places because they lacked permission. Even after I pointed out how to use sudo to move files or change the permissions on the folders. We then had a meeting where they said it was obvious that linux had security flaws because they were unable to copy files when they needed to. They recommended we switch to microsoft servers to run moodle.

I thought this would be the end of it, that they would give up and my boss would be happy. But I was wrong. He then made me purchase a windows 2003 server license and set it up for them with apache and php. They have now "modified the source code" on this server and want to show us their "changes" so we can move them into production. I can't wait for this insanity.

 

[MotionMan]

Originally posted by: BornStar
User: I closed a document and clicked No when it asked me if I wanted to save. Can you recover that information?
Me:

I hate that one. Is there a way to explain it to the user without sounding pissed off and/or condescending?

I doubt it.

MotionMan

 

[bobdole369]

Anyone who has ever used one of the major CRM packages at a call center should recognize this one - such as Vantive, Peoplesoft, Siebel, etc.

File/Close Group/Save Changes? NO..........

A missed click could cause you a ton of work.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: pontifex
yeah, the "slow computer" stuff sucks ass. also, the person who always has the same problem and no matter how many times you fix it or tell them what to do/not to do, they still manage to fuck it up again and again.

our ticket system allows users to enter a "needed by" date. i routinely get tickets for stuff thats needed by a date that is impossible to do.

for instance, the latest one is a supervisor's request for a 2nd monitor for one of his employees. his needed by date is 3 days. It'll take a day or 2 just to get approval, and with my supervisor lately, it can take a week or more to get a PO from him so i can order the stuff. then you have to add on shipping and handling time. i can't just pull this stuff out of my ass.

haha, as i'm reading this thread, said user in my post comes over and asks if i got an approval for his request yet. i said no, the guy approving it would send it to you (obviously since you sent it).

him: "oh, ok, well i need this right away so this person can do her work. you don't have the part on hand?"

me: "no, i don't" (why do you think i told you to send for approval to order one? we don't keep spare parts on hand (unless it happens to be from a PC that is no longer needed)).

him: "ok, well i need it right away. how long will it take to get it?"

me: "depends. you have to wait for approval and then i have to send the approval to my boss to get a PO. I can probably have it overnighted if we need to once i get approval to order it." (getting a PO from my boss has been like pulling teeth lately. They are moving everything to a new building, so they are pretty busy).

i'm just thinking, maybe you should have thought about this ahead of time? Everyone expects IT to just wave a magic wand and have the problem be fixed in seconds.

What might be worse are the people who bitch and complain about a problem and make it sound like a huge disaster or whatever. then, when you say alright, let me look at it, they get all pissy and huffy and tell you they don't have time, you have to come back later to do it. wtf????

 

[trmiv]

Well all hell just broke loose here, the entire network is down, all campuses. No idea what's going on. Luckily our open vendor access wireless still works, so I can still do the important stuff!

 

[trmiv]

Originally posted by: MotionMan

Originally posted by: trmiv
There are two things that drive me nuts (OK, way more than two, but these are the only two I'm typing out right now)

I hate when you go to work on a users computer and they hover, staring at what you're doing asking questions. "Oh what did you do there? What are you installing?" Just shut up and let me work!

But I also hate when you go to work on a user's computer and they frigging disappear! You need them to sign back in and they are no where to be found. The best thing for them to do is to either get their spare chair and sit outside their cube, or go chat with a co-worker. Leave me alone, but don't disappear!

1. At least they are interested in trying to learn what to do next time so they do not have to bother you again (not that any of the information ever sinks in).

2. When you arrive, you should tell them to hang around. I could see that, if someone could not work on their computer for a while, and that is the only way they can get any work done, they would take an unscheduled, uncharged break.

Either that or ask them for their login and password when you arrive.

MotionMan

It's strictly against our IT policy to ask for a user's login/password.

As far as learning what to do, most of the time it's something they aren't going to be able to do anyway, so there is no point in them learning it. User's can't add/remove software, apply patches, force software downloads from our management system, etc. If it's something they can do on their own, I usually show them.

Usually I'll tell them I need them to log in or whatever. Most of the time they stay but there are a few users that will say "I'm just going to grab some coffee I'll be back in a couple of minutes to log back in." Then I never see them again.