The Greatest Insults of all Time

[1967mustangman]

I was wonderng what you out there thought the greatest insults of all time were. I personally like two from Sir Winston Churchill

Bessy Bradock, "Winston, you're drunk!"
Winston Churchill, "Yes, madam, and you are ugly; but tomorrow morning I shall be sober!"

Lady Astor, "Winston, if you were my husband I would poison you tea!"
Winston Churchill, "Madame, If I were you husband, I would drink it!"

 

[TripleJ]

<<Lady Astor, &quot;Winston, if you were my husband I would poison you tea!&quot;
Winston Churchill, &quot;Madame, If I were you husband, I would drink it!&quot;>>

Muahahaha, that's the funniest one I've ever heard.

 

[TuffGuy]

<french accent> i fart in your general direction...

 

[The Wildcard]

hahah, that is pretty funny

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

yer mom

 

[Jothaxe]

^

 

[Phunktion]

<--- that one always hurts the most..

 

[Jothaxe]

<< <--- that one always hurts the most.. >>



Damnit! You got me, Phunktion :|

 

[aznmist]

:| <--- constipated

 

[Buddhist]

&quot;Everytime you speak you subject from the combined knowledge of the human race&quot; -parlament member addressing another member.

 

[1967mustangman]

Here is another one:

It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to have missed it. - Mark Twain

 

[PlunX]

Err.. I thought it went..

Bessy Bradock, &quot;Winston, you're drunk!&quot;
Winston Churchill, &quot;Yes, madam, and you are ugly; but tomorrow morning I shall be sober, although you shall still remain ugly.&quot;

 

[Cooltech2k]

<< Bessy Bradock, &quot;Winston, you're drunk!&quot;[/Q}


<< Winston Churchill, &quot;Yes, madam, and you are ugly; but tomorrow morning I shall be sober, although you shall still remain ugly.&quot; >>





hehe Nice....

 

[mundania]

<< Err.. I thought it went..

Bessy Bradock, &quot;Winston, you're drunk!&quot;
Winston Churchill, &quot;Yes, madam, and you are ugly; but tomorrow morning I shall be sober, although you shall still remain ugly.&quot; >>



hehe yea.. but it's funnier when it's implied

 

[yellowperil]

LOL...those Churchill quotes are classics.

I think 1967mustangman said it correctly. That last part is implied, which is why it's funny.

Charles Barkley, when Moses Malone entered the locker room (when they played together on the Sixers): &quot;The average age in this room just went up 20 years.&quot;
on Larry Bird: &quot;As long as Bird's around, I'll only be the second-worst defensive player in basketball.&quot;

 

[snakesnfrogs]

I'm sure someone will take offense, but I'm gonna post it anyway, because one of my black friends said it to another black guy back when we were in high school and at the time it was funny as hell(even the other guy laughed at it):



&quot;you're so dark, you could leave scuff marks on a piece of charcoal&quot;

 

[perry]

<< I was wonderng what you out there thought the greatest insults of all time were. I personally like two from Sir Winston Churchill

Bessy Bradock, &quot;Winston, you're drunk!&quot;
Winston Churchill, &quot;Yes, madam, and you are ugly; but tomorrow morning I shall be sober!&quot;

Lady Astor, &quot;Winston, if you were my husband I would poison you tea!&quot;
Winston Churchill, &quot;Madame, If I were you husband, I would drink it!&quot; >>



HEhe.. I used to have one of those in my sig!

 

[shiner]

Don't know who originally said it but my favorite is...

&quot;You sir are a modest man with much to be modest about.&quot;

 

[Amused]

One of my Favorites:

Bulwinkle: &quot;I'm going to give him a piece of my mind!&quot;

Rocky: &quot;That's what I like about you, Bulwinkle. No matter how little you have, you're always willing to share!&quot;

I have more talent in my smallest fart than you have in your entire body.
- - - Walter Matthau (to Barbra Streisand)

Cheap, lying, no good, rotten, four flushing, lowlife, snake licking, dirt eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood sucking, dog kissing, brainless, d!ckless, hopeless, heartless, fat@ss, bugeyed, stifflegged, spotty lipped, worm headed sack of monkey sj!t! Holy sh!t! Where's the Tylenol!
--Chevy Chase -- Christmas Vacation
It's much funnier if you HEAR it.
Here: link

 

[brxndxn]

This is supposedly the ultimate cut-down from when I was 10 - if you had it memorized, your cool points went up by 10:

'Mother f*cker t|tty sucker two-ball bitch. Every time I see you, you make my balls itch. Your daddy's in jail pissin' in a pail, yo momma's in the tub losin' her blood, yo brother's a piece of gay tail, and yo sista's got p*ssy for sale.'

 

[datalink7]

I would try to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my @$$

 

[Aenygma]

Nothing I read.. just what I think sometimes........ &quot;The Wit in here flows like molasses.&quot;

 

[compuwiz1]

&quot;Did you just smile at me, or does your ass have teeth?&quot; :Q

 

[Moonbeam]

You're a poopoo head. The young Moonbeam.

 

[vektor]

Im gonna download my fist into your face.