Trey Parker's and Matt Stone's hilarious press release

[Vin0134]

Text

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for Earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!

-- Trey Parker and Matt Stone, servants of the dark lord Xenu

 

[wvtalbot]

The scary part is scientologists actually beleive in Xenu.....

 

[ballmode]

how can you believe something like that? i mean this stuff goes against alot of science, then again faith...

 

[Cheetah8799]

http://www.theregister.com/2006/03/20/south_park_repeat/

 

[whalen]

Haha, this is great...

Xenu

 

[Ktulu]

All Hail Xenu!!!!!!!!

 

[Cattlegod]

bahahaha, that is great!

 

[SaltBoy]

Apparently, we all live on the planet formerly known as Teegeeack.

I DID NOT KNOW THAT! :Q

 

[DaShen]

they are pretty funny

 

[gigapet]

They are only saying those hurtful remarks cuz they are full of fear! THETANS UNITE!

 

[DanTMWTMP]

hehehe

 

[ViRGE]

It will be interesting to see what the first episode of the new season will be like. Hayes quit far enough in advance that Stone & Parker could do a whole show from scratch, so they may have a rebuttal episode as soon as Wednesday.

 

[tweakmm]

You're so glib.

 

[TheTony]

You're so sued.

 

[Playmaker]

Originally posted by: ballmode
how can you believe something like that? i mean this stuff goes against alot of science, then again faith...

Yeah, it's almost as crazy as virgin births and resurrections. There are a lot of nuts out there.

 

[BlackAdam]

I absoloutely love those guys. Chef can go screw himself. So glad we're not taking these scientology whackjobs seriously.

 

[darkswordsman17]

Originally posted by: ViRGE
It will be interesting to see what the first episode of the new season will be like. Hayes quit far enough in advance that Stone & Parker could do a whole show from scratch, so they may have a rebuttal episode as soon as Wednesday.

I'm curious to see their response as well. They're going to have to get rid of Chef somehow won't they?

I was thinking that they'll build it up like its going to be some big thing, and then they'll either kill Chef right at the beginning of the episode and then not mention him at all after that, or else the opposite (not mention him at all during the episode and then he gets killed right at the end).

 

[daveymark]

Originally posted by: Playmaker

Originally posted by: ballmode
how can you believe something like that? i mean this stuff goes against alot of science, then again faith...

Yeah, it's almost as crazy as virgin births and resurrections. There are a lot of nuts out there.

:roll:

 

[thirdeye]

That's pretty hilarious

 

[preslove]

Originally posted by: darkswordsman17

Originally posted by: ViRGE
It will be interesting to see what the first episode of the new season will be like. Hayes quit far enough in advance that Stone & Parker could do a whole show from scratch, so they may have a rebuttal episode as soon as Wednesday.

I'm curious to see their response as well. They're going to have to get rid of Chef somehow won't they?

I was thinking that they'll build it up like its going to be some big thing, and then they'll either kill Chef right at the beginning of the episode and then not mention him at all after that, or else the opposite (not mention him at all during the episode and then he gets killed right at the end).

I think the scientologists should abduct Chef, with the boys coming to the rescue. Some kind of techno wonder could get him back, but with a sex change. Chef should be some super hot model giving the boys sex advice...

 

[darkswordsman17]

Originally posted by: preslove

Originally posted by: darkswordsman17

Originally posted by: ViRGE
It will be interesting to see what the first episode of the new season will be like. Hayes quit far enough in advance that Stone & Parker could do a whole show from scratch, so they may have a rebuttal episode as soon as Wednesday.

I'm curious to see their response as well. They're going to have to get rid of Chef somehow won't they?

I was thinking that they'll build it up like its going to be some big thing, and then they'll either kill Chef right at the beginning of the episode and then not mention him at all after that, or else the opposite (not mention him at all during the episode and then he gets killed right at the end).

I think the scientologists should abduct Chef, with the boys coming to the rescue. Some kind of techno wonder could get him back, but with a sex change. Chef should be some super hot model giving the boys sex advice...

Not bad.

Or have Jesus save him and he'll convert to Christianity or something.

They have to be loving this, there's so many things they can do with it. They could string people along and not have anything to do with Chef in the episodes if they wanted to just to get ratings up (since they'll probably get some people to tune in just to see what they do with the character).

 

[SarcasticDwarf]

Originally posted by: Playmaker

Originally posted by: ballmode
how can you believe something like that? i mean this stuff goes against alot of science, then again faith...

Yeah, it's almost as crazy as virgin births and resurrections. There are a lot of nuts out there.

Scientology is a lot easier to dismiss than most other religions. Hubbard (the founder) gave very specific information which can be categorized as complete and utter BS. For instance, he claims that something like 13 trillion humans were stacked around a couple dozen volcanos a couple million years after the dinasaurs died. He then explains they were all blown up by hyydrogen bombs. Let's see, in order to kill that many people, so many bombs would be required that it would be geologically obvious. In addition to that, some of the volcanoes he lists did not even exist at that time. It goes on from there.

Other religions are vague, making it difficult to show either way.

 

[Jzero]

Originally posted by: SarcasticDwarf
Other religions are vague, making it difficult to show either way.

Although perhaps this vagueness is simply the result of a couple thousand years' worth of cloudiness?

 

[Stuxnet]

Tom Cruise is going to have Anand remove this rediculously inflammatory thread!!!!

(the pics at Wikipedia are awesome btw)

 

[darkswordsman17]

Originally posted by: jbourne77
Tom Cruise is going to have Anand remove this rediculously inflammatory thread!!!!

(the pics at Wikipedia are awesome btw)

Under what topic? Scientology I'm assuming.