Volunteered to do free web work years ago for a friend

[manlymatt83]

Go back about 3 years --- my friend is poor. Just got married, working long nights in an ER, and trying to start his own business, which is very successful, but needs a website and he doesn't have enough money for one.

So I design a site for him, complete with shopping cart, etc. I'll admit - I stall a lot. "I'll try to do it this week" came out of my mouth a lot until a few months down the line when I finally got it done (mind you for free, I'm also hosting it for free).

Then, he began adding a bunch of things on top of it. 3 months ago, he requested a few things to be changed, which I haven't had the time to do yet.

I get an email from him a few days ago:

Sorry to hear that man. Hope you feel better. Saturday is my deadline. I understand if it's not done by then because you're sick, but I cannot wait longer than that. Let's just put it to rest if it's not done by then. Thanks.

Now, this "stuff done" that he wants is not only the stuff from 3 months ago, but also stuff he added as soon as a week ago.

I agree it's my fault for keeping it dragging this long, but at the same time, I know he doesn't have enough money to pay someone to do this, and I feel bad when I can't get it done. I know once this website is done it'll really help his business, but now he wants things like the ability to upload and resize pictures, etc. - stuff I would charge $1000 to do. I already would have charged $2000+ for the site I built for him. And it's just getting frustrating.

So at one point do I say enough is enough? On one side of the fence, I feel bad that he has had health problems lately, is really stressed with the economy (they just had two kids plus trying to pay down their house and he just started a new full time job), but at the same time I need to watch my stress levels and my health -- I can't keep stressing out helping everyone and their mother for free when I have bills to pay.

Thoughts? Should I do this work for him and say no more? Or should I say there's no way I can get it done by Saturday, and I'm sorry, and recommend a few people who I know work for cheap and COULD do it by Saturday?

Thanks.

 

[Ns1]

Reply:


I need to bring in outside help if you want it done by then. It would cost XXX to have it done by that deadline.


If this is for a business then he should pay the business expenses.

 

[Tim]

Originally posted by: Ns1
Reply:


I need to bring in outside help if you want it done by then. It would cost XXX to have it done by that deadline.


If this is for a business then he should pay the business expenses.

Okay, you're good...

 

[akshatp]

Originally posted by: mjuszczak

So at one point do I say enough is enough?

NOW

 

[CrazyLazy]

This is why you never do stuff like this for friends.

 

[Ika]

If his business is "very successful", why doesn't he have enough money to pay for his own website?

 

[SagaLore]

You should put limits on what you're willing to do for free. You ARE allowed to say NO from time to time.

 

[ultimatebob]

Originally posted by: Ns1
Reply:


I need to bring in outside help if you want it done by then. It would cost XXX to have it done by that deadline.


If this is for a business then he should pay the business expenses.

Good answer! That line would be enough to get most of my customers to either shut up or reply with an alternative deadline.

I'd also make a point to start charging for hosting if you continue to get demands like this. Friends are friends, but business is business!

 

[Vehemence]

Finish it for him, but sleep with his wife. :camera:s on ATOT too.

 

[waffleironhead]

Originally posted by: CrazyLazy
This is why you never do stuff like this for friends.

Lucky for you you dont have any... ZING!

 

[BeauJangles]

I think the moral of the story is that if you want to help a friend by making a website, you should draw it up like all other contracts you have with clients. It should set what is included under the price (free) and what is not, when it must be done by, etc, etc. The only difference should be that no money is exchanged.

 

[Ns1]

don't goose us!

 

[Baked]

First of all, don't have poor people for friends, they ask too much favor and have no means to return the favor. 2nd, tell your friend to get a vasectomy. And finally, delete the website and all the backups and tell your friend to fuck off.

 

[imported_DocHolliday]

Originally posted by: Baked
First of all, don't have poor people for friends, they ask too much favor and have no means to return the favor. 2nd, tell your friend to get a vasectomy. And finally, delete the website and all the backups and tell your friend to fuck off.

An excerpt from Baked's book entitled "How to Win Friends and Influence People" a New York Times Best Seller.

 

[xSauronx]

Originally posted by: dNor
Finish it for him, but sleep with his wife. :camera:s on ATOT too.

:laugh:

 

[Paladin3]

I give friends my "friend price" so that I don't feel like I'm being taken advantage of, and they can still have reasonable expectations regarding deadlines and the quality of my work because they are paying for it. I've made the mistake of working for free for people I'm not that close to, who would probably not return the favor if the situations were reversed, and ended up regretted it.

 

[aceO07]

Set up a payment plan in which he can start paying you back once the website is up. He'll expect that your services will also be free in the future if you don't.

 

[manlymatt83]

Originally posted by: ultimatebob

Originally posted by: Ns1
Reply:


I need to bring in outside help if you want it done by then. It would cost XXX to have it done by that deadline.


If this is for a business then he should pay the business expenses.

Good answer! That line would be enough to get most of my customers to either shut up or reply with an alternative deadline.

I'd also make a point to start charging for hosting if you continue to get demands like this. Friends are friends, but business is business!

I've switched all my friends over to my company hosting, which is charged @ a "friends" rate. I just haven't switched this guy over -- he's still on my personal server.

 

[Ns1]

mjuszczak - ygpm

 

[jjones]

Something just doesn't add up here. You started doing this for him 3 years ago, at which time you felt the business was successful and just needed a web site, so you help out a friend and throw him a freebie.

Fast forward 3 years and this "successful" business still can't afford a web designer/developer? You should have told him no more freebie a long time ago. You did him a favor but you can't make it the gift that keeps on giving unless you want to, so the ball's in your court to have some balls.

 

[manlymatt83]

Originally posted by: jjones
Something just doesn't add up here. You started doing this for him 3 years ago, at which time you felt the business was successful and just needed a web site, so you help out a friend and throw him a freebie.

Fast forward 3 years and this "successful" business still can't afford a web designer/developer? You should have told him no more freebie a long time ago. You did him a favor but you can't make it the gift that keeps on giving unless you want to, so the ball's in your court to have some balls.

I just emailed him a few paragraphs saying he needed to find a different solution fast otherwise things are just going to keep being delayed.

Waiting on a response.

 

[George P Burdell]

Originally posted by: akshatp

Originally posted by: mjuszczak

So at one point do I say enough is enough?

NOW

 

[Pacemaker]

Explain to him that working for free means he doesn't get to give you a deadline or expect you to drop everything to get it done. If he wants it to be done on a timetable then he should be paying you.

 

[OdiN]

Hey Matt....I could use a custom shopping cart system for my photography.

Just let me know what that is done. I really could use this by next Friday. Thanks man.

 

[ivan2]

normally for things like this I won't even start before 6 months from the time they asked for it. this way they won't have much expectation and it also keeps them from requesting enhancements...