Was an apology required - Purpose of Female Breasts

[realibrad]

A pin heads will look at something according to their own assumed definitions looking for deviations from their expectations. A holistic contextual thinker will try to see what the other person intended by the word they used. Language is malleable an easily influenced by artistic creativity. It can be imprecise, suggestive, allegorical, used loosely or with intentional precision. You try to shoehorn people into a single rut. No matter how skilled you may be at linear narrow minded precision, you won't lose that capacity by adding flexibility and generosity to your thinking. Other people may have linguistic gifts you lack.

This is my way of telling you that the use of the word aggressive as applied to a socially inappropriate fixed gaze allowed me to understand with perfect clarity what he meant. Try looking at things you think people express incorrectly as if you were wrong and look for why what they said is perfectly OK. The advantage to this is that you will irritate people less by being pedantic. You are a good person and so I don't want you to face constant social rejection.

Do you mind explaining what you think he meant in other words than aggressive so I can understand.

The point of me asking what was meant by aggressive is an attempt for me to understand his usage. The only way I know to expand my understanding of others usages is to ask them how they use it. I have not yet developed mind reading.

He did not say anything that was not okay. He used a word that in the context of what I saw did not fit my usage. I asked how it was aggressive and then provided a hypothetical to see how that usage would fit. Those are both great ways to help me understand his usage.

If people are annoyed by my ignorance of their beliefs and thoughts, then I have little hope of doing anything other than annoying them further, because, I will almost certainly try and understand them by engaging them.

I'm not too worried about social rejection on this forum. My goal here is to have discussions and challenge ideas. I'm not concerned about people not liking me, other than how it might limit the aforementioned.

 

[realibrad]

No you stupid fuck. It becomes aggressive when it is done long enough that she notices and then continues, and then continues even after she has asked it to stop. Both stages are aggressive with the second stage being more aggressive than the first. Why is this so fucking complicated for you? I put all the words in my posts and you ignore some of them so you can attack that straw man.

I'm not attacking anything. I simply did not understand how it was aggressive.

Are you saying that a if she asked him to stop, that its indicating that violence might happen?

 

[dank69]

Dank: It isn't acceptable to jerk off in public.
Realibrad: What do you mean it isn't acceptable to jerk off?

 

[interchange]

Even mentioning female attractiveness in a male puberty book is appallingly hetero-normative. It is 2018 folks. Boys shouldn't be forced to read that women have to be attractive at all.

Hmmm. Well, I certainly see your point. However, I do not believe the solution is restriction of the information but rather a more comprehensive provision of information and flexibility with a goal of not setting a normative stance aside from a typical stance. Certainly from a biologic perspective, a large majority of males will experience this. I disagree that "boys shouldn't be forced to read that women have to be attractive at all." My remembrance of pre-adolescence and and adolescence was a lot of gaps, rumor-milling, and uncertainty among myself and peers. Looking at women in magazines, porn on computers, etc. was also both heterosexual and homosocial.

 

[bshole]

I'm not attacking anything. I simply did not understand how it was aggressive.

Are you saying that a if she asked him to stop, that its indicating that violence might happen?

A person much larger and more powerful than you is staring at you. You ask them to stop. They do not stop. If you can't see this as rather frightening and threatening, you have something in common with sociopaths.

 

[child of wonder]

I'm not attacking anything. I simply did not understand how it was aggressive.

Are you saying that a if she asked him to stop, that its indicating that violence might happen?

In case you haven't noticed, it's 2018 and what we used to call harassment is now called aggression and speech is actually violence. One cannot advance an agenda with soft language.

 

[dank69]

I'm not attacking anything. I simply did not understand how it was aggressive.

Are you saying that a if she asked him to stop, that its indicating that violence might happen?

Not only did you remove the qualifier of how long I said you have to stare, you then redefined staring to be the same as simply "looking at" in the very next question...

 

[child of wonder]

A person much larger and more powerful than you is staring at you. You ask them to stop. They do not stop. If you can't see this as rather frightening and threatening, you have something in common with sociopaths.

What should be done about it?

 

[dank69]

A person much larger and more powerful than you is staring at you. You ask them to stop. They do not stop. If you can't see this as rather frightening and threatening, you have something in common with sociopaths.

Thank you. I swear realibrad is fucking autistic or something.

 

[dank69]

In case you haven't noticed, it's 2018 and what we used to call harassment is now called aggression and speech is actually violence. One cannot advance an agenda with soft language.

What the fuck is the difference between aggression and harassment in your mind?

 

[bshole]

What should be done about it?

Different question. Realibrad couldn't seem to understand that it was threatening. In my day, if it was my girlfriend, it was handled by me beating the shit out of the guy.

Bottom line, the appropriate reaction should be the guy getting his ass pounded thoroughly. What kind of beta scrub male would engage such shitty behavior?

 

[dank69]

Different question. Realibrad couldn't seem to understand that it was threatening. In my day, if it was my girlfriend, it was handled by me beating the shit out of the guy.

Bottom line, the appropriate reaction should be the guy getting his ass pounded thoroughly. What kind of beta scrub male would engage such shitty behavior?

You can tell he doesn't want to just let this discussion go. Instead of just admitting I might have a point he has moved on to asking what should be done about a pure hypothetical situation that I admit has a very low chance of arising (although I believe the chance to be greater than zero). I simply wanted to demonstrate that removing the text might be a good idea since nobody can explain what the benefit to keeping the text there might be. Edit: Except for interchange who suggested that keeping the text there while additionally explaining that even though we evolved to like looking at breasts we should also understand what is and is not socially acceptable to do about it, and also be mindful of how damaging it is to a girl's psyche to place too much importance on her appearance.

 

[bshole]

You can tell he doesn't want to just let this discussion go. .

Well that is Realibrad. He is the kind of guy who could get into a week long debate with Bill Clinton over the meaning of "is". Generally with him I make my point a few times and then disengage once we start into a rabbit hole.

 

[realibrad]

A person much larger and more powerful than you is staring at you. You ask them to stop. They do not stop. If you can't see this as rather frightening and threatening, you have something in common with sociopaths.

It all depends on the context. I'm not a powerful person by any means, but by that logic, women should always fear men as generally speaking men are stronger than women.

I grew up as a outsider of sorts, and, the people I ran with brought me into many situations where I was the only white guy around. I supposed I became accustomed to people looking at me. A 6' white kid in a sea of 5'ish Mexicans at quinceanera with my large gay best friend would always get looks. Nobody would talk to me, but every time I went to one, people would always look at me and many time security would come talk to me to find out if I should be there.

 

[realibrad]

Not only did you remove the qualifier of how long I said you have to stare, you then redefined staring to be the same as simply "looking at" in the very next question...

You seem to be under the impression I was saying you said or did something wrong. I simply did not understand. You got pretty uppity for nothing.

 

[dank69]

You seem to be under the impression I was saying you said or did something wrong. I simply did not understand. You got pretty uppity for nothing.

Don't ignore parts of my posts and we won't have problems. Either consume them in their entirety or ignore them completely.

 

[realibrad]

Don't ignore parts of my posts and we won't have problems. Either consume them in their entirety or ignore them completely.

I did not ignore anything. I simply asked how it was aggressive, and then gave a hypothetical to see if it would still fit.

Also, does me responding to you qualify as me not wanting to let this go?

 

[dank69]

It all depends on the context. I'm not a powerful person by any means, but by that logic, women should always fear men as generally speaking men are stronger than women.

I grew up as a outsider of sorts, and, the people I ran with brought me into many situations where I was the only white guy around. I supposed I became accustomed to people looking at me. A 6' white kid in a sea of 5'ish Mexicans at quinceanera with my large gay best friend would always get looks. Nobody would talk to me, but every time I went to one, people would always look at me and many time security would come talk to me to find out if I should be there.

See? There you go again ignoring important parts of his post.

Women might be intimidated by men staring even after they've been asked to stop becomes women should always fear men.

 

[Jaskalas]

The publisher has apologized and is revising the book to remove the bit about breasts being attractive.

Sounds like he caved to pressure from puritanicals. The funny thing about the new variety is they support Dems and claim to be liberal. The Church has changed, but the message to force conformity is the same.

 

[dank69]

I did not ignore anything. I simply asked how it was aggressive, and then gave a hypothetical to see if it would still fit.

You did ignore something. You ignored all the relevant qualifiers.

Also, does me responding to you qualify as me not wanting to let this go?

I wasn't talking about you when I said that, I was talking about CoW. Changing the discussion without acknowledging agreement or impasse on the previous topic is terrible form and probably the source of the majority of the anger generated in this forum.

 

[Moonbeam]

realibrad: Do you mind explaining what you think he meant in other words than aggressive so I can understand.

M: I did in the post. Also, this is an attempt to draw me down into the weeds when I am trying to draw you out of them. I also asked you to generously attempt to supply alternatives to his use of the word other than how you might strictly define it. Aggressive, for example can mean violent. It can also imply something done with extra vigor.

r: The point of me asking what was meant by aggressive is an attempt for me to understand his usage. The only way I know to expand my understanding of others usages is to ask them how they use it. I have not yet developed mind reading.

M: You need to develop mindreading. As I said, you put your mind in the place of the other's mind and feel alternative possibilities that other mind may have had in mind using the word aggressive. You can do that holistically by contextual judgment while using your strength for analysis by considering all the definition variations that might make sense in the context. This requires an inner intention to alter approach rather than stay in a groove.

r: He did not say anything that was not okay. He used a word that in the context of what I saw did not fit my usage. I asked how it was aggressive and then provided a hypothetical to see how that usage would fit. Those are both great ways to help me understand his usage.

M: They are great ways to make the other person feel you are dense since many people are more skilled than you are in naturally doing what I've suggested. They don't need your king of help. To help you in the way you demand requires inordinate patience. Trust me.

r: If people are annoyed by my ignorance of their beliefs and thoughts, then I have little hope of doing anything other than annoying them further, because, I will almost certainly try and understand them by engaging them.

M: It is better to strike out trying than as a result of the expectation of failure. You have to ignore the fact that not being expert at something can draw criticism. People who do that will be intolerant of their own weaknesses and resistant to seeing a need to change. They need their own kind of help. Some people are mean and you don't seem to be mean to me. You also can't just suddenly master this and that is assuming that what I am trying to say is actually fits. I am doing my best to explain something I think I see but I can be as wrong as anybody else. My approach may not be helpful or even apply. But I think we are both doing as best we can.

I want to do a thought experiment: Imagine that you are standing in a bathing suit at a public shower for sand and salt removal at a public beach and an ugly giant ogre special notice of you. You feel it is special because he is naked and has gotten an erection obviously from looking at you. He comes over and starts to stare his eyes running all over you. One could argue he is only being an ogre but the subjective feeling might well be that he is staring aggressively. Then I say I don't see how eyes can run. Isn't it feet that run? Or is he crying from onions? I don't think of onions as hostile.

r: I'm not too worried about social rejection on this forum. My goal here is to have discussions and challenge ideas. I'm not concerned about people not liking me, other than how it might limit the aforementioned.

M: I have no trouble with that but I personally would want to strive to be the least obtuse that I can in the process. My thought was that improvement is possible there. I don't mind criticism as much as many it seems to me, but I hate criticism that is justified.

 

[momeNt]

Hmmm. Well, I certainly see your point. However, I do not believe the solution is restriction of the information but rather a more comprehensive provision of information and flexibility with a goal of not setting a normative stance aside from a typical stance. Certainly from a biologic perspective, a large majority of males will experience this. I disagree that "boys shouldn't be forced to read that women have to be attractive at all." My remembrance of pre-adolescence and and adolescence was a lot of gaps, rumor-milling, and uncertainty among myself and peers. Looking at women in magazines, porn on computers, etc. was also both heterosexual and homosocial.

I'm just being an ass to be honest. I don't know what the answer is to this, other than parents should be involved with their children, and if a girl feels self-conscious about the size of her breasts, or a boy feels self-conscious about the size of his peter, the parents shouldn't blame a book for making their child self-conscious, they just need to take a more active role in their kids life and reinforce good feelings of self-worth. Consumerism has taught people to be on auto-pilot. Subscribing to your household goods, auto-bill pay, and in a sense, parenting.

Asking your kids what you learned at school today, what are you reading, and being involved solves probably 99% of these problems.

 

[mikeymikec]

The publisher has apologized and is revising the book to remove the bit about breasts being attractive.

Just wait for the backlash when the passage in question is changed to "breasts are NOT ATTRACTIVE. (Justin the gay ed says hi) #gayagenda".

 

[mikeymikec]

We have reached a point in our society where offense is a form of currency now and anything, no matter how minor, factual, or unoffensive, will attract whooping brigades of social justice warriors sitting behind their keyboards looking to cash in on it.

"Yes, hello, I would like to order a pizza. I have been offended by six things on the Internet today."

(said no-one ever, and no-one will)

 

[realibrad]

realibrad: Do you mind explaining what you think he meant in other words than aggressive so I can understand.

M: I did in the post. Also, this is an attempt to draw me down into the weeds when I am trying to draw you out of them. I also asked you to generously attempt to supply alternatives to his use of the word other than how you might strictly define it. Aggressive, for example can mean violent. It can also imply something done with extra vigor.

r: The point of me asking what was meant by aggressive is an attempt for me to understand his usage. The only way I know to expand my understanding of others usages is to ask them how they use it. I have not yet developed mind reading.

M: You need to develop mindreading. As I said, you put your mind in the place of the other's mind and feel alternative possibilities that other mind may have had in mind using the word aggressive. You can do that holistically by contextual judgment while using your strength for analysis by considering all the definition variations that might make sense in the context. This requires an inner intention to alter approach rather than stay in a groove.

r: He did not say anything that was not okay. He used a word that in the context of what I saw did not fit my usage. I asked how it was aggressive and then provided a hypothetical to see how that usage would fit. Those are both great ways to help me understand his usage.

M: They are great ways to make the other person feel you are dense since many people are more skilled than you are in naturally doing what I've suggested. They don't need your king of help. To help you in the way you demand requires inordinate patience. Trust me.

r: If people are annoyed by my ignorance of their beliefs and thoughts, then I have little hope of doing anything other than annoying them further, because, I will almost certainly try and understand them by engaging them.

M: It is better to strike out trying than as a result of the expectation of failure. You have to ignore the fact that not being expert at something can draw criticism. People who do that will be intolerant of their own weaknesses and resistant to seeing a need to change. They need their own kind of help. Some people are mean and you don't seem to be mean to me. You also can't just suddenly master this and that is assuming that what I am trying to say is actually fits. I am doing my best to explain something I think I see but I can be as wrong as anybody else. My approach may not be helpful or even apply. But I think we are both doing as best we can.

I want to do a thought experiment: Imagine that you are standing in a bathing suit at a public shower for sand and salt removal at a public beach and an ugly giant ogre special notice of you. You feel it is special because he is naked and has gotten an erection obviously from looking at you. He comes over and starts to stare his eyes running all over you. One could argue he is only being an ogre but the subjective feeling might well be that he is staring aggressively. Then I say I don't see how eyes can run. Isn't it feet that run? Or is he crying from onions? I don't think of onions as hostile.

r: I'm not too worried about social rejection on this forum. My goal here is to have discussions and challenge ideas. I'm not concerned about people not liking me, other than how it might limit the aforementioned.

M: I have no trouble with that but I personally would want to strive to be the least obtuse that I can in the process. My thought was that improvement is possible there. I don't mind criticism as much as many it seems to me, but I hate criticism that is justified.

To me the threat is the Ogre's proximity to me. If he Ogre is aroused by me, but is not near me then he does not appear to be a threat. Now, If I do see him close to me, and he appears excited, I would feel uncomfortable with the possibility he could be a threat. At that point I would ask him to back up, but there are still a lot of variables I would have to fill in for me to know how to answer the question fully.

Also, I'm not trying to help anyone here. Well, other than my self.

If people do not enjoy helping me, then there is no need to help me. It would be silly to expect people to take their time and spend it on helping me if they do not enjoy it.