I use one of those soft bristle brushes, like the ones at car washes but alot softer. I have used these, along with a lot of people I know and it doesn't leave swirl marks on your vehicle like others do, just use a seperate brush to wash your wheels/tires. And be sure to clean them out good.
As for soaps, thats still up in the air with me, I haven't decided what I like the best yet. I have been using this California Gold stuff, it seems to be working well.
Josh