What does your banking situation look like with your spouse?

[JEDIYoda]

Not if she is spending all your money and sleeping with the neighbor next door.

You have a messed up wife......

 

[MegaFlop]

My wife and I have similar incomes.

We have joint and individual accounts.
Everything goes into the joint account, minus several hundred per month to our individual accounts (equal).

All bills and expenses are paid from the joint account. The individual account is purely for discretionary / entertainment.

 

[nickbits]

All accounts are joint. Never had any problems.

This

 

[dr150]

I'm enjoying reading this thread w/ all the "schemes" involved that aren't just joint.
.
.
I assume the separate account thing is male created/enforced. The male is the "power earner" and creates these rules.

I assume the submissive woman is fine with it b/c the AnandTech engineer makes so much bank that she puts up with this petty, control shyte.

......If I was a woman and the dude I was going to marry told me to put my Walmart check in my account and he put his Google check in his account and also have separate CC's, etc, I would tell him to fuck off and to go play in traffic.

 

[soulcougher73]

Her checking
Me checking, 4 savings.

She transfers 95% of her paycheck to me. We use joint CC for everything and i pay it off at end of month.

 

[soulcougher73]

a happy wife, is a happy life!!!

Not if she is spending all your money and sleeping with the neighbor next door.

As long as she is happy though

 

[DrPizza]

Hand check to wife, it disappears, bills get paid.

Check? It's 2016!

I don't even know which week is my pay week. Every other Friday is all I know. In fact, I don't even know how much my take home is. All I know is that occasionally, I'll stay after school a couple extra nights each week to do cafeteria duty, and my wife will say, "hey, there was an extra couple hundred in your pay. What was that for?"

One main checking account, all bills paid from that - wife does all the bill paying. Plus, we divert a hundred or so each week into a separate account for extra vacation money, or for some project. Right now, it's building up to replace the entire roof on our house with steel roofing & to reside the entire house.

Only "problem" - sometimes we'll have a very large charge on a credit card, say an extra $2000. My wife will split the payment up over 2 months, because she doesn't like paying all of that at once. And, that's with much more than that sitting in the savings account. So, occasionally, we pay interest on something that we shouldn't have had to pay interest on. I shrug my shoulders and realize it's not the end of the world. See JediYoda's quote:

a happy wife, is a happy life!!!

 

[kaerflog]

Ours is a bit unique. I married a girl from another country but she made good money over there and provide some support for her family. I knew this might be a problem in the future so I came up with something like this. I'm the sole provider for right now.
We both have joint accounts, checking savings, CCs, etc.....but she has a separate checking account. I give her some money every month to put into that account and she keeps all incomes from her PT jobs.(she's going to school right now). She can use this money to give to her parents or to splurge. I'd rather have it this way so I never have to deal with giving her parents money ever. In the almost 5 years we've been married, it has grown close to $30K.
I often joke with her that she gets a keep a separate account but I don't. One secret that I do keep from her since the beginning is that I have a safe deposit box that has $50k for my rainy day.
We are both very good with money. Any big purchases have to be discussed together. I joke with her that once she finished school, we can switch place. I can be the househusband.

I must add that she made the mistake of bragging to her parents one time on how much money I make(I guess she just wanted her parents to know she married a good guy). So now they think we are a fucking money tree. The last instant that pissed me off to no end is that they sent the younger sister to study outside the country knowing that they cannot afford to. They think since we(I) make so much money that its our obligation to help the younger sister out. Not happening.

 

[dank69]

Separate checking/savings accounts. She pays some bills and I pay some bills. I cut her a check for the difference between the two, because she pays most of the large ones (mortgage, daycare, etc).

We have a joint investment account (retirement, college fund, etc).

I hate having to write her a check. It's the only check I ever write anymore. We just haven't taken the time to set up some way to transfer funds electronically yet.

 

[Stopsignhank]

25 years. Joint accounts. 1 Checking, 1 savings, 1 e-trade and our Fidelity 401Ks.

Anything big we talk about. No real definition of big. Been that way through good times and bad.

 

[dr150]

25 years. Joint accounts. 1 Checking, 1 savings, 1 e-trade and our Fidelity 401Ks.

Anything big we talk about. No real definition of big. Been that way through good times and bad.

Looks like you and me are in the minority in this thread about having joint accounts with the Mrs.

 

[dullard]

I assume the submissive woman is fine with it b/c the AnandTech engineer makes so much bank that she puts up with this petty, control shyte.

You assume too much.

1) I have the partial separate accounts posted above only because my wife wanted it that way.
2) You can (and we do) put the same dollar amount in the separate accounts regardless of income.
3) Depending on the year, my wife often makes more than I do. Wise AnandTech engineers marry other engineers (or similar profession that can support themselves).

 

[dr150]

Wise AnandTech engineers marry other engineers (or similar profession that can support themselves).

Sometimes...but most don't marry other engineers..

Engineers are nerds.

Nerds don't get laid.

As women become old, they reluctantly submit and finally go for the nerd and his bank.

Nerd marries...but NOW he realizes he is the QB/Homecoming King and has the power to set the rules.

Lady puts up with his money rules since its better than being a broke-ass spinster living in a noisy apt. building.

 

[PowerEngineer]

I'm always mystified when I hear married couples with separate accounts and they each 'pay into' a joint account to pay bills or some sort. That's not a marriage, it's a business deal.

Joint checking, joint savings. What else is there?

I'm enjoying reading this thread w/ all the "schemes" involved that aren't just joint.

This isn't the first (or last) time that this subject has (will) come up on ATOT. It really should be obvious that the best financial arrangement for any couple depends on the natures of the two people involved.

My mother handled the money in our family, and I rather naively expected my wife would handle our finances after we got married. I pretty quickly learned, however, that she tends to spend whatever money she has access to. Setting up accounts in only my name for saving money for vacations, college educations, and retirement turned out to be the best way to prevent her spending tenancies from derailing our longer-term financial plans.

The bottom line is that you need to discover an arrangement that works for you, and you may need to open your mind to alternatives other than your preconceived ideal in order to discover it.

My two cents...:sneaky:

 

[PowerEngineer]

Sometimes...but most don't marry other engineers..

Engineers are nerds.

Nerds don't get laid.

As women become old, they reluctantly submit and finally go for the nerd and his bank.

Nerd marries...but NOW he realizes he is the QB/Homecoming King and has the power to set the rules.

Lady puts up with his money rules since its better than being a broke-ass spinster living in a noisy apt. building.

I see you know it all. :\

 

[dr150]

I see you know it all. :\

Ya man. It is what it is.

I've seen it with too many work colleagues.

The online dating scene has empowered these homely looking guys to be VERY picky.

Many go on sex binges....because....NOW....they can!

 

[Stopsignhank]

Looks like you and me are in the minority in this thread about having joint accounts with the Mrs.

That is the only thing that you and I have in common. Especially your views towards women.

I'm enjoying reading this thread w/ all the "schemes" involved that aren't just joint.
.
.
I assume the separate account thing is male created/enforced. The male is the "power earner" and creates these rules.

I assume the submissive woman is fine with it b/c the AnandTech engineer makes so much bank that she puts up with this petty, control shyte.

......If I was a woman and the dude I was going to marry told me to put my Walmart check in my account and he put his Google check in his account and also have separate CC's, etc, I would tell him to fuck off and to go play in traffic.

Sometimes...but most don't marry other engineers..

Engineers are nerds.

Nerds don't get laid.

As women become old, they reluctantly submit and finally go for the nerd and his bank.

Nerd marries...but NOW he realizes he is the QB/Homecoming King and has the power to set the rules.

Lady puts up with his money rules since its better than being a broke-ass spinster living in a noisy apt. building.

 

[Squisher]

Everything is joint and I do all the banking. I had to make a little booklet I titled "When I die." All our account information is in there, along with stuff like how to light the pilot on the fireplace and where my life insurance policy is.

 

[dr150]

That is the only thing that you and I have in common. Especially your views towards women.

I'm being facetious and over the top. But truth remains. ()

 

[KentState]

We have a pretty big disparity in income, but we have a system that seems to work.

1. I have a checking/savings/money market - my pay check
2. She has a checking/saving - her pay check
3. Joint checking

I cover all the bills/house/car payments and she pays for groceries. I figure if she can't cover groceries and have plenty of spending money on $3k/month, then something is wrong.

 

[nk215]

Joint.
My better half is also an ATM. Just minutes ago, we deposited $15K to her brother’s account. He needs the money for something I don’t even bother to ask this time. Last time, it was for fixing a house -- $10K. There was a time before that … You get the idea.

For some reason, my better half keeps on thinking she’ll see the money back. I count those as gifts against my will.

Sorry I have to vent. I am so f****** mad.

 

[dr150]

Joint.
My better half is also an ATM. Just minutes ago, we deposited $15K to her brother’s account. He needs the money for something I don’t even bother to ask this time. Last time, it was for fixing a house -- $10K. There was a time before that … You get the idea.

For some reason, my better half keeps on thinking she’ll see the money back. I count those as gifts against my will.

Sorry I have to vent. I am so f****** mad.

That's really generous of you. You must make really good money for that not to hurt.

My wife has deadbeat relatives that always ask for money. They're a black hole money pit who feel entitled and with no sincere gratitude to boot.

As a rule, we take the Suze Orman approach to feel "insulted" when they emote attitude as to why we won't lend. If they aren't fiscally responsible or have a history of being honorable about paying the money back in hard luck times, they ain't seeing a dime. Go to the bank and get a loan then.

 

[WackyDan]

No joint accounts here and been married 12 years. Wife is also a stay at home mom. She works part time as a 1099.

I had a credit card issued from my AMEX in her name, so she uses that for most everything associated with household bills, etc.

I didn't want a joint account initially because my wife was very bad at managing her expenses/debt before we met... And I didn't know the extent of it until we were almost married... That meant I didn't trust her with the idea of a joint account. While my wife is very frugal, it still didn't make sense to have a joint account and to be honest it has worked just fine.

 

[Harrod]

We have 2 joint accounts, but I don't mess with her account and she doesn't look at mine. Neither of us are big spenders.

 

[nk215]

As a rule, we take the Suze Orman approach to feel "insulted" when they emote attitude as to why we won't lend. If they aren't fiscally responsible or have a history of being honorable about paying the money back in hard luck times, they ain't seeing a dime. Go to the bank and get a loan then.

He never asked me directly so I never had a chance to say no. My wife can't say no to her family and I can't say no to her.

I did tell my wife this time would be the last. I know it won't be -- it was too easy for him; a phone call last night and money is there the next day. I wouldn't stop asking if I were in his shoes.