Over the last decade, our system has evolved to this:
1. We both have separate AMEX SERVE cards. Basically a reloadable debit/gift card. Auto-transfers a weekly allowance for each of us with a sum we have both agreed on. Has a simple app that lets you check the balance so you know where you're at.
2. We both have a small credit card (joint account with a $1k credit line) that we share for gas & emergencies. Gas stations around here typically put a $150 hold on your card, so even if we both fill up, it only puts a temporary hold of $300 total. The rest is used for stuff like if you get a flat tire & need a replacement and have to come up with $400 on the spot.
3. Checking account (joint bank account). Pretty much just used for paying fixed expenses (rent, car payment, etc.). Leftover goes into different savings accounts - regular savings, emergency/rainy day fund (which sometimes gets used & then becomes the first priority to refill), tucking away for vacations or other upcoming expenses on a weekly basis, etc.
We had a different system when money was tighter, like back in college - had a spreadsheet with a calculator & did an end-of-day entry to track everything that came in or out. That helped to identify what we actually spent money because it forces you to be honest about every cent you earn or spend...we started getting a clear idea of how much we spent on food, eating out, entertainment, gas, everything. Eventually created a due-date calendar for bills, setup auto-pay, made a spreadsheet so we'd know how much to transfer into checking for the auto-pay bills each week, and got better jobs up to the point where we didn't have to track every cent (migrated to the SERVE cards), but had a solid financial system we both agreed on.
Having separate "allowance" cards is nice because then you don't have to track everything on a daily basis or worry about a bill coming out & not being able to buy something or having to check in with your S.O. if you want to buy something, and it prevents you from 'drinking from the firehose'...you're limited to what's on the card, which acts like a debit card, so you can't exceed what you don't have in there, and you can always check the balance instantly with a swipe on your phone (no login required for current balance, which is nice!).
It's nice too because then you don't have to justify buying something or check in with your S.O. to make a purchase or have a fight about what you spent, because you're using your own personal, agreed-upon allowance. If you don't spend it all that week, it accumulates so you have a personal slush fund. Works for everything from haircuts to getting nails done to grabbing lunch to upgrading your computer to buying birthday presents (then you don't have to be sneaky about buying gifts & then explaining away the missing money, haha).
The credit card is used sparingly, just for gas or emergencies, and is paid off in full every month. Holidays, vacations, birthdays, and anything else we want are paid for in cash (which sometimes means downscaling on what we'd like to do, depending on cashflow at the time)...our rule is, if you have to buy it on credit, then you can't really afford it (barring the big stuff like a house, school fees, and cars). I'm a big fan of Smartypig, which lets you auto-transfer to an online bank account (making it harder to get quick access to the cash to spend), and also lets you get some nice rewards, like if you're shopping at Best Buy or Home Depot:
https://www.smartypig.com/
It's a hard system for people to adopt because our culture is all about instant gratification, but unfortunately I'm not in the AT baller's club, so I have to live within a budget. I started using that system back in college...I was on a 2-year PC upgrade plan, basically every two years I'd buy a new $2,000 computer setup. $20 a week from my minimum-wage jobs went into a separate savings fund...2 years = 104 weeks = $2k (plus change, plus any interest, plus any rewards if you use a service like SmartyPig). Overall, I like this system for a lot of reasons:
1. It prevents us from going crazy with spending. No big credit limit standing by or wad of cash available in the bank needing to be burned through, just your allowance card & a credit card safety net for gas and emergencies. It removes the incentive to spend a lot just because it's available, because it's not.
2. We know exactly what our budget is for fixed & variable expenses & they are all paid on a schedule. No sorting through papers or being late on bills or wondering if we missed something. No having to "sit down to do finances" - it's a quick thing I check on every few nights to keep tabs on, takes like five minutes tops.
3. No fighting about finances because we both have separate allowances & don't have to justify regular purchases to each other or track the spending against a financial log. This pretty much only works if you're at an income level where you can do it comfortably, which mostly depends on your lifestyle. Some people need $100k a year and others only need $40k. Working in a career where you get a livable wage is a lot different than working at a minimum-wage job where you have to manage every penny to get by.
4. We don't spend what we don't have, outside of necessities like a home, vehicles, and education. This is made easier by limiting your access to money, which is done with the auto-load SERVE cards & small emergency credit card. You can't rationalize away more money into your card if you don't have it available!
It may
look easy, but it's not. It took me a long time to come up with this simple yet elegant system. It's not a system that would really apply to everyone either, but it works pretty good for us. For me, it's kind of like having a Chromebook...it's just another thing I don't have to worry about because as long as I'm working, the system is setup to take care of itself as long as I live within the boundaries I set, which is easy because I opt to limit myself to my SERVE & small credit card for day-to-day transactions.