The saga continues...
Called T-Mobile to activate the sim card in my new tablet.
Them: I need the IMEI number for your device.
Me: What?
Them: IMEI number, it should be on the Settings screen.
Me: Nope, there's a Win 8 reg code but no IMEI number.
Them: Do you have the box?
Me: Nope.
Them: I need the IMEI number, the serial number, under Settings.
Me: Ain't one there. Where else can I look?
<me is looking all over the device info screens and dialogs trying to find this>
Them: You'll have to bring the device to one of our stores.
Me: Ugh.
The actual conversation went on for a good ten minutes with no resolution of where HP or MS hid the serial number. When I got home, I googled it. To find the serial number of a Win 8 device simply go to the command prompt and type:
wmic bios get serialnumber
netsh mbn show interface
But of course, how intuitive. Now I have to go to a T-Mobile store. Still better than cussing my way through T-Mobile's phone tree again. Nothing turns me into a foamy mouthed lunatic like voice driver phone trees. "Say 'Yes' or 'No'". "Die in a fire you scum sucking machine and let me talk to a human." "I'm sorry, I don't understand." "The F you don't."