What have I done?

[Alphathree33]

<< Well then... give it a few shots and if she's still unresponsive give it up. You tried. There's no sense in subjecting your feelings to this. There's nothing worse than not knowing what you've done (or not done) to cause someone to become angry or to stop talking to you. Who's to say she won't do it again? >>



My feelings have already been dumped into the gutter.

I DO have a crush on her, but I'm not one to look for unattainable things.

What really makes me sad is we had something special before, and now that I was greedy and looked to spend more time with her, I have ruined what we had in the first place.

 

[gopunk]

is there any way she would know that you have a crush on her? i think that's the reason... seriously... some girls freak about stuff like that...

 

[fastz28]

<<
I DO have a crush on her, but I'm not one to look for unattainable things.

What really makes me sad is we had something special before, and now that I was greedy and looked to spend more time with her, I have ruined what we had in the first place. >>



A-ha, I knew it, been there.

What you need to do now is spend less time with her. You spent too much time with her and she doesn't value your "time". Be scarce, keep yourself with other thing, hobby, school, perferablely with another girl.

 

[Kjazlaw]

Perhaps you got overzealous and scared her off. It happens... so the other alternative is to just back off and give her space. You'd be amazed at what perserverance and space do to help those kinds of things. She'll realize a little later that, wow, she misses something in her life by not talking to you and apoligize for getting "weird" on you. The key is not to annoy or pressure her. Good luck!

 

[Alphathree33]

Part of it...I have to attribute to my friend who goes for half the girls he sees. I'm not one to do this sort of thing at all - like I said, I'm fairly shy - and he encouraged me to do a lot of things I wouldn't have normally done. In the spirit of "life's too short", I did them without thought about the consequences. Normally I would analyze something to death before taking action... and in this case the regular me would not have done anything at all.

Also she talked to this same friend earlier today for some time... so I have a feeling it IS just me that she is giving the cold shoulder, which supports the theory that she doesn't want to lead me on.

 

[Alphathree33]

<< is there any way she would know that you have a crush on her? i think that's the reason... seriously... some girls freak about stuff like that... >>



Well I wasn't exactly doing anything that suspicious, but maybe if she read between the lines then yes she could have that idea.

ALL of my friends know, but male friends. They would never tell her. One of her friends (female) KIND OF, SORT OF knows, but I tried to dispel that thought the moment she had it

 

[Alphathree33]

In response to Kjazlaw and fastz28,

I will do that. It will be a rough first day back to school though... shying away from making eye contact, sitting as far away from her as possible, trying to focus on other things. I just hope it helps me to be objective about everything.

I guess the problem is that I cannot get my mind around the fact that she would do this to me given previous history. It's like she is a completely different person. I can't really bring myself to be angry with her... but I am not exactly happy either.

 

[gopunk]

i bet she knows, either one of your male friends let it slip to a female, who in turn let it slip to her, or her female friends just thought of it by themselves and told her that. girls are weird like that... they'll just make up stuff. of course, most of the time they're right, because it's obvious, but that's besides the point

 

[Alphathree33]

Alright I'm taking some serious action here to prevent me from interacting with her at all.

I deleted her from my ICQ list. I removed her phone number from my PDA. I deleted the callers list on my phone and took her out of the directory. And tomorrow morning I will probably go jump off a bridge for doing all of that, lol. But everyone is right, it is for the better.

I am still going bowling tomorrow with some very, very good male friends. They will help my mind wander elsewhere, I hope.

 

[Kjazlaw]

I'll reiterate... good luck! Karma dictates that later on when you've completely forgotten her she'll come back and say she has a crush on you. Happened to me, but at least either way you've got the emotional edge.

 

[Alphathree33]

<< I'll reiterate... good luck! Karma dictates that later on when you've completely forgotten her she'll come back and say she has a crush on you. Happened to me, but at least either way you've got the emotional edge. >>



My emotions don't switch on and off like that, and I doubt hers do either. I am talking with a girl via e-mail that I haven't seen for five years and I still have a crush on her, always did, always will. And all of those other girls that I never liked... I never will like them.

 

[Alphathree33]

I am considering asking one of her friends who is also my friend to see if I can siphon any information.

Do you folks think that is a good idea? It would at least allow me to determine if our hypothesis is correct while at the same time it would not agitate her any further if it is.

 

[voodooguy]

You are acting like a total stalker. If I were her, I would stay the hell away from you too.

She is telling you in no uncertain terms TO BACK THE HELL AWAY. Get a hint, Einstein.

Why she wants this is none of your business. By pursuing her, you are harrassing her and stalking her. That is not right.

 

[Alphathree33]

<< You are acting like a total stalker. If I were her, I would stay the hell away from you too.

She is telling you in no uncertain terms TO BACK THE HELL AWAY. Get a hint, Einstein.

Why she wants this is none of your business. By pursuing her, you are harrassing her and stalking her. That is not right. >>



AHHHHHH LOL alright. I didn't think I was acting like that, so thanks for the info.

Better hearing that from you than her

 

[Argo]

I know this sounds crazy -- but try to pay her less attention. Girls don't like it when a guy is always in her face... Do this, and she'll be the one asking for your company.

 

[Alphathree33]

<< I know this sounds crazy -- but try to pay her less attention. Girls don't like it when a guy is always in her face... Do this, and she'll be the one asking for your company. >>



Honestly I wasn't "always in her face". There are people I spent a lot more time with and still do who don't consider me a stalker. Lol. Other girls even.