What kind of activities do 12 year old girls like?

[Lazarus52980]

First, a little background:

My wife made friends with a lady she works with that is going through a hard time financially right now. We have been trying to help her and her soon to be 12 year old daughter by helping them with food, household stuff, and spiritual guidance for about the last 6 months or so.

The daughter has been gone for the summer visiting her father, and just came back a few days ago. The father drove her back from Chicago and was going to stay with the mom for a few days before returning. Unfortunately, an argument between the mother and father took place this morning that ended with the father choking the mother while slamming her head against the mirror in the bathroom repeatedly while the daughter looked on. Police were called, and the father left before they showed up. Since he does not live in the area, I don't think he will be seen again soon.

This brings me to the point: I had already been trying to be something of a father figure to this young girl, but given how she just saw he biological father behave, I feel the need to step up my efforts of trying to provide a better example of masculinity for her. Her birthday is coming up next week, and it happens to fall on a day when I have the evening free. I am intending to offer to do something with her for her birthday, but since my children are quite a bit younger (my oldest daughter is only 6) I am not sure what 12 year olds like to do... My current thought is to take her to Nickelodeon Universe at the Mall of America and go on the roller coasters and rides she would want. We could then go and get her nails and/or makeup done or other "tween" stuff like that.

Is that stuff that real kids like to do? Can anyone give me any advice on this please?

 

[HumblePie]

 

[jaedaliu]

Talk to her mom about what's appropriate.

 

[Lazarus52980]

Talk to her mom about what's appropriate.

I did that already, she seemed fine with whatever the daughter wanted to do (which is fine, but is no help...)

 

[Imp]

What I thought when first reading the title...

Taylor Swift and One Direction concerts... the hell away from parents.

 

[Lazarus52980]

If that was really what I was going for, why would I post about it??

 

[Imp]

If that was really what I was going for, why would I post about it??

You're on a tech forum, possibly behind an IP mask or whatever the hell they call it, and got curious.

 

[Lazarus52980]

You're on a tech forum, possibly behind an IP mask or whatever the hell they call it, and got curious.

I was afraid that it could be taken this way, and am even somehwat afraid people might think that out in public... I am sure I could not proivde any evidence that would convice anyone, so I will not attempt to try.

I do hope that someone with kids about this age will post something useful....

 

[OCGuy]

They are really helpful in finding lost puppies.

 

[Sonikku]

Get her a Nintendo Wii. It's like having a second parent.

 

[JM Aggie08]

Hard liquor and reruns of M*A*S*H.

 

[Lazarus52980]

Get her a Nintendo Wii. It's like having a second parent.

Actually, when I upgrade to an Xbox One later this year, I was already planning to give her the old X360 and Kinect...(Christmas present)

 

[Lazarus52980]

Hard liquor and reruns of M*A*S*H.

Um, giving alchol to a minor is illegal...(plus I don't drink)


+1 for M*A*S*H*. Great show. :biggrin:

 

[dank69]

obligatory PIIHB

 

[Pardus]

What kind of activities do 12 year old girls like?
still innocent
What kind of activities do 16 year old girls like?
ummm
What kind of activities do 18 year old girls like?
oh boy
What kind of activities do 20 year old girls like?
oh yea

 

[Lazarus52980]

obligatory PIIHB

I am not familiar with that acronym...

 

[Lazarus52980]

This thread is not quite going the way I expected it... Where is Waggy or others who might be able to actually assist me?

Well, that's not quite true. It's not going how I HOPED it would, it is sort of going how I expected it would...

 

[jaedaliu]

I blame it on her mom. She should have given you more direction than, "I trust your judgement."

It's really nice that you're planning on taking her out for her birthday. I don't know the cost of anything in Minnesota, but maybe work with her mom to throw a party for her and her friends? I would totally dig a moon bounce (even now at my age,) but she might be too cool for it at 12.

I never had any role model issues growing up, but I imagine the most important thing is to be around as a male figure that respects women and treats them right.

 

[Lazarus52980]

I blame it on her mom. She should have given you more direction than, "I trust your judgement."

It's really nice that you're planning on taking her out for her birthday. I don't know the cost of anything in Minnesota, but maybe work with her mom to throw a party for her and her friends? I would totally dig a moon bounce (even now at my age,) but she might be too cool for it at 12.

I never had any role model issues growing up, but I imagine the most important thing is to be around as a male figure that respects women and treats them right.

Thank you for the serious answer.

The party thing might not be a bad idea either... I wonder if I could put something together in a week? There are a couple of "tranpoline parks" in the area that might do the trick (if I could figure out how to get everyone there... transportation can be a challenge for many of the people from that area...)

 

[darkewaffle]

Depends as much on her personality as her age imo. A tomboy is going to enjoy different things than a princess.

 

[Lazarus52980]

Depends as much on her personality as her age imo. A tomboy is going to enjoy different things than a princess.

Yeah, very true. I have not spent a lot of time with her yet, but from what I have seen her do on the computer, she does a lot of fashion stuff on different websites. She strikes me as more "princess" than "tomboy" but who knows?

I could always just bring her somewhere and buy her some clothes, but that seems a lot less memorable...(maybe more important though, with just starting school again...)

 

[Pulsar]

I hear they like old vans with 'free candy' sprayed on the side.

Sorry. I couldn't resist.

Give her a choice! Have 2 or 3 things lined up. If you're going to a mall, tell her she can get her hair done, go on rides, or pick out a nice new outfit. Then offer her a choice between a couple sit-down restaurants.

If you have a couple things and she chooses one, it'll generally end up making her much happier.

 

[biostud]

First, a little background:

My wife made friends with a lady she works with that is going through a hard time financially right now. We have been trying to help her and her soon to be 12 year old daughter by helping them with food, household stuff, and spiritual guidance for about the last 6 months or so.

The daughter has been gone for the summer visiting her father, and just came back a few days ago. The father drove her back from Chicago and was going to stay with the mom for a few days before returning. Unfortunately, an argument between the mother and father took place this morning that ended with the father choking the mother while slamming her head against the mirror in the bathroom repeatedly while the daughter looked on. Police were called, and the father left before they showed up. Since he does not live in the area, I don't think he will be seen again soon.

This brings me to the point: I had already been trying to be something of a father figure to this young girl, but given how she just saw he biological father behave, I feel the need to step up my efforts of trying to provide a better example of masculinity for her. Her birthday is coming up next week, and it happens to fall on a day when I have the evening free. I am intending to offer to do something with her for her birthday, but since my children are quite a bit younger (my oldest daughter is only 6) I am not sure what 12 year olds like to do... My current thought is to take her to Nickelodeon Universe at the Mall of America and go on the roller coasters and rides she would want. We could then go and get her nails and/or makeup done or other "tween" stuff like that.

Is that stuff that real kids like to do? Can anyone give me any advice on this please?

Does she have any friends she could invite?

 

[OCGuy]

OP it sounds like you have taken a liking and are quazi-adoping this 12 year old girl, who by all accounts will be going through the most "difficult" parts of her life in the next 2-3 years.

Your intentions sound noble, but keep in mind that:

1. You will never be her father, and she will never treat you as such. Try to stop her from dating the Sr. football player as a Freshman? Not going to happen. Catch her with weed? Can't do anything about it.

2. Your other kids will see how you treat her during those times, and will hold it against you if you are more strict with them.



Have fun, OP! Oh damn I better have a boy when I have one.

 

[Blackjack200]

I don't really interact with 12 year old girls that much (despite my elaborate traps), but I suspect she probably doesn't really want to hang out with you on her birthday. No offense, but taking her to the mall and going on roller coaster rides with her sounds creepy as hell. If she was like 7 or 8, maybe, 12 is too old for that.

I know your heart is in the right place. Just get her a nice card with $20 or something. She'll appreciate that.