What's the cause of the abnormally high divorce rate in the US?

Page 4 - Seeking answers? Join the AnandTech community: where nearly half-a-million members share solutions and discuss the latest tech.

Riprorin

Banned
Apr 25, 2000
9,634
0
0
People in US actually get married unlike in Europe where you just live together and have kids.
 

Pocatello

Diamond Member
Oct 11, 1999
9,754
2
76
Idaho has a very religious population (mostly Mormons), and yet we still have the divorce rate of around 50%.
 

alkemyst

No Lifer
Feb 13, 2001
83,967
19
81
The driving factor in America is everyone learns to be not accountable for their actions and that everything revolves around them.

It's not getting better children have now learned to defy adults and even when wrong their parents will defends them as always right. Usually the old "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" arguement and of course the "MY HUSBAND/DAD/GUY DOWN THE HALL IS A LAWYER/COP/etc".

My answer is usually is pretty evil. I don't appreciate the creation of future problems that will affect me in a decade or so.

Å
 

RobCur

Banned
Oct 4, 2002
3,076
0
0
because you can't have 2 wife or 2 husband if you're a girl, dirvorce give someone a good reason to remarry and try someone else. Its sad but hell it happen all the time like that, 90 percent of marriage ends up like this! It sucks I know but no one is commited to be together forever. All it take is a one disagreement and depending on how serious it is and voila! boom! we're going our seperate way.
 

spidey07

No Lifer
Aug 4, 2000
65,469
5
76
Originally posted by: DrPizza
1. Instant gratification society. We want something, and we want it now. We don't want to wait.
2. Decay of values - enhanced and spread via media (movies, mtv, etc.)
3. Porn - creates unrealistic expectations for bedroom performance.

Before I got married, we had to meet with the preacher concerning why we wanted to get married (and have to go through all those pre-marriage classes). He told me that I was the first person in a long long time who didn't respond to the question "why do you want to get married?" with "because we're in love." In fact, he pointed out that I never even said the word love. He said we seemed to have a good idea what we were getting into - a lifelong committment to someone else, and we didn't have to attend any of those pre-marriage classes. Looking back after 15 years, it's amazing that we made it through some of the tough periods - considering that most people these days would have given up. And, we're quite happy today.

You're a very special lady. And I admire your beliefs and convictions. Congratulations on your 15th anniversary.

cheers!
spidey
 

Armitage

Banned
Feb 23, 2001
8,086
0
0
Because it's easier then sticking it out and trying to work through things, and for the woman, it's often highly lucrative.
No social stigma left, so what's the downside from her POV?
 

wayliff

Lifer
Nov 28, 2002
11,718
9
81
Selfishnes
Competition
Money
Lack of Communication
Lack of Attention
Abandonment
Snoring
Lack of Commitment
Loss of Passion
Dissapointment
Fools

etcetcetcetc...
 

Nitemare

Lifer
Feb 8, 2001
35,466
4
76
Originally posted by: Vic
Originally posted by: Nitemare

Go back to the 60's when it was illegal for black's to marry white's, flash forward to today where people are hounded to fit into the typical nuclear family marriage mold. Some people do not fit this mold and what is considered to them as normal is seen as deviant and wrong by the Christian Right. Sort of like interracial marriages way back then.

Catholic priests have to take a vow of celibacy for their career. If man was intended to be celibate, he would have been born without a penis

Gay men are being reeducated by the Church to lead hetero lives.

People are getting married because it is the "Right" thing to do...in order to procreate or because he has already knocked her up and it is the Christian thing to do. People are getting married before they truly know their partner or are ready for it. Marriage is not for everyone nor should it be refused between consenting adults...Also it should not be a sin to remain unmarried

It's just a fvcked up world and although the 1st amendment does grant us freedom of religion, it does not grant us freedom from dogmatic religious persecution from the morality police. I believe in taking responsibility and control for your on lives rather than rely on special interest groups to make those decisions for them
I'm more concerned about the corporate money-makers who tell young married couples that they're not properly married unless they spend $20k+ (now 3 months salary) on a ring and another $30k on the wedding, all so she can have her "Special Day".


As it is, the oaths involved in marriage are very straight-forward. If you don't understand the words "'Til Death do us part", then you shouldn't get married. Part of taking responsibility for yourself is learning to understand your own decisions.

They are retarded for buying into it. The Mrs and I spent less than 500, including the wedding bands(most costly items). Matching Bride and Groom T-Shirt and caps and knowing that we would not have to spend the next 5-10 years paying it off...=
 

poopaskoopa

Diamond Member
Sep 12, 2000
4,836
1
81
Can't speak for other countries besides the U.S. and Japan, but I suspect that it has to do with the options available to women(and men). Women in the U.S. have easier times landing jobs that pay enough for herself and her kid(s) partly because they're also not subjected to overt discrimination due to age/gender in terms of hiring and wages(compared to Japan). There's also less social stigma for being a divorcee in the U.S.. There's also better support infrastructure for child support collection for women in the U.S.. While the divorced women on ATOT may or may not scoff at this, my mother had nowhere to turn(in Japan) as a single mother to collect child support from my father, and I've seen my stepfather's(an American) 1st wife ride his ass in numerous ways to get more money out of him(in the U.S.) So while I've never walked in your shoes, if I were to do it, I'd like to do it in the U.S..

I see people bemoaning high divorce rates here, but I think it's better than seeing couples trapped together. Divorce rates may be lower elsewhere, but I think it's inaccurate to assume that the married couples in other countries know how to work out their issues any better than the married couples in the U.S.. It could be that they have no other option. It certainly appeared that way in Japan.

I've heard that the divorce rate in Japan has been rising. I haven't been there for the past 12 years, so maybe it's easier for divorced women over there now. I hope so.
 

Svnla

Lifer
Nov 10, 2003
17,999
1,396
126
Most of you talked about the reasons of failed marriages so I will talk about the reasons of successful marriages.

I talked to several people with long lasting marriages (20 years plus) and they told me the followings:

1) Committment (for good times AND bad times)
2) Willingness to listen and understand the spouce
3) Accept of the spouce for who he/she is
4) Be the best friend of the spouce
5) Last but not least, never go to bed mad, always talk about the problems and discuss solutions
 

Cashmoney995

Senior member
Jul 12, 2002
695
0
0
Because America sometimes tends to needlessly increase the ammount of stress in our lives. Most divorces happen because of stress. Otherwise...the person is just a biatch. Honestly the way kids are being raised to day is also a big factor. We need to go back to an elementary school thats ultimate purpose is towards manners and respect. Then we can get better teachers, give more money to teachers, have smarter people, and itll tend towards less stressful lives for both parents and children.

The next thing. LAWYERS. Defamation and wahhh wahh you said this or did this to me should no longer be able to have money involved unless there was actual damage to property. If a third party psychiatrist or docter believes that damage has been done, mentally or physically then only the cost of treatment can be debated. The ammount of "emotional" damage claim should be limited at 5 thousand dollars. Thatll fix more stress.
 

BladeWalker

Senior member
Aug 31, 2002
892
0
0
1. People's lack of conviction to their words.
2. Different views about dating, sex, and monogamy.
3. Unrealistic TV portrayal of how our life should be.
4. Lack of morals/principles.

Worst reason to get married: physical attraction/sex
Best reason to get married: have/raise children

 

alkemyst

No Lifer
Feb 13, 2001
83,967
19
81
Originally posted by: poopaskoopa
Can't speak for other countries besides the U.S. and Japan, but I suspect that it has to do with the options available to women(and men). Women in the U.S. have easier times landing jobs that pay enough for herself and her kid(s) partly because they're also not subjected to overt discrimination due to age/gender in terms of hiring and wages(compared to Japan).

Perhaps 12 years ago...but my wife just left there as a single older woman making $5-6K USD monthly as a programmer. Her girlfriends made similar. Yes the men do make a bit more on average, but that's worldwide. The difference is much less than in america though...so much so that many of our Japanese friends are concerning returning home.

There's also less social stigma for being a divorcee in the U.S.. There's also better support infrastructure for child support collection for women in the U.S.. While the divorced women on ATOT may or may not scoff at this, my mother had nowhere to turn(in Japan) as a single mother to collect child support from my father, and I've seen my stepfather's(an American) 1st wife ride his ass in numerous ways to get more money out of him(in the U.S.) So while I've never walked in your shoes, if I were to do it, I'd like to do it in the U.S..

You are giving reasons that basically say worldwide everyone would divorce more if afforded a 'risk-free' split....bleh. I don't think that's the case at all. In the US we are taught (I wasn't) that the only thing that matters is you. P!ss on everyone else no matter how wrong you are. Only in america do you find such p1sspoor service oriented work. Young kids working waiter/server jobs and acting as if they are too good to serve. They can't be fired because you'd only have to train another exactly the same.

It's a mess and this leads to selfish adults and selfish adults walk out on things. There are legitimate reasons for divorce I feel...and I feel other nations divorce more or less for the legimate things....there are always exceptions though.

I see people bemoaning high divorce rates here, but I think it's better than seeing couples trapped together. Divorce rates may be lower elsewhere, but I think it's inaccurate to assume that the married couples in other countries know how to work out their issues any better than the married couples in the U.S.. It could be that they have no other option. It certainly appeared that way in Japan.

I've heard that the divorce rate in Japan has been rising. I haven't been there for the past 12 years, so maybe it's easier for divorced women over there now. I hope so.

Again this info is a little dated. 12 years ago people didn't kiss in the streets, even hold hands publicly in Japan...now the young are. Women are not as repressed....hell look at the Middle East now, women are starting to take a definitive stand worldwide.

I also think marriages are happier elsewhere as their isn't all this stigma to sex, I think worldwide people tend to have sex pre-maritally much more commonly as a 'relationship' than in america....husbands and wives are more open to the fact that they may be attracted to someone else and the possibility of extra-marital affairs are more openly discussed in many other cultures. They learn love is one thing and sexual attraction is a totally different matter.

I think once people know what a proper relationship is and only enter commitedly to them the more success there would be.

In America, people are quick to jump ship, find the next best thing and marry whoever they are with at that 'magic age' they set for themselves to be married.

Å
 

badmouse

Platinum Member
Dec 3, 2003
2,862
2
0
It's because of this chick named Gayle.
At least, that's why my husband's divorcing me.
 

Garet Jax

Diamond Member
Feb 21, 2000
6,369
0
71
People are too self involved nowadays to think about someone else, let alone compromise with them. 100% of marriages will fail when they are between two people who refuse to compromise.
 

0roo0roo

No Lifer
Sep 21, 2002
64,862
84
91
just because the rate is high doesn't mean its necessarily bad. tyrants like saddam get 100% of the vote, does that make him better then our leaders elected by far less?
 
sale-70-410-exam    | Exam-200-125-pdf    | we-sale-70-410-exam    | hot-sale-70-410-exam    | Latest-exam-700-603-Dumps    | Dumps-98-363-exams-date    | Certs-200-125-date    | Dumps-300-075-exams-date    | hot-sale-book-C8010-726-book    | Hot-Sale-200-310-Exam    | Exam-Description-200-310-dumps?    | hot-sale-book-200-125-book    | Latest-Updated-300-209-Exam    | Dumps-210-260-exams-date    | Download-200-125-Exam-PDF    | Exam-Description-300-101-dumps    | Certs-300-101-date    | Hot-Sale-300-075-Exam    | Latest-exam-200-125-Dumps    | Exam-Description-200-125-dumps    | Latest-Updated-300-075-Exam    | hot-sale-book-210-260-book    | Dumps-200-901-exams-date    | Certs-200-901-date    | Latest-exam-1Z0-062-Dumps    | Hot-Sale-1Z0-062-Exam    | Certs-CSSLP-date    | 100%-Pass-70-383-Exams    | Latest-JN0-360-real-exam-questions    | 100%-Pass-4A0-100-Real-Exam-Questions    | Dumps-300-135-exams-date    | Passed-200-105-Tech-Exams    | Latest-Updated-200-310-Exam    | Download-300-070-Exam-PDF    | Hot-Sale-JN0-360-Exam    | 100%-Pass-JN0-360-Exams    | 100%-Pass-JN0-360-Real-Exam-Questions    | Dumps-JN0-360-exams-date    | Exam-Description-1Z0-876-dumps    | Latest-exam-1Z0-876-Dumps    | Dumps-HPE0-Y53-exams-date    | 2017-Latest-HPE0-Y53-Exam    | 100%-Pass-HPE0-Y53-Real-Exam-Questions    | Pass-4A0-100-Exam    | Latest-4A0-100-Questions    | Dumps-98-365-exams-date    | 2017-Latest-98-365-Exam    | 100%-Pass-VCS-254-Exams    | 2017-Latest-VCS-273-Exam    | Dumps-200-355-exams-date    | 2017-Latest-300-320-Exam    | Pass-300-101-Exam    | 100%-Pass-300-115-Exams    |
http://www.portvapes.co.uk/    | http://www.portvapes.co.uk/    |