Why Are You Single?

[Hammer]

Wow, interesting replies. Seriously though, the biggest problem around here seems to be lack of confidence. Which also happens to be probably the single most important thing to success, and not just with girls either, but life in general. Absolute, unshakeable confidence (almost to the point of arrogance ) is the key.

 

[MaxDepth]

Why? Because:

A) When I was 22 a beautiful, intelligent, funny young woman asked me to marry and her and I laughed because I thought she was joking. I do so much regret that. (We've since stayed friends; she's married to a wonderful guy and has a little boy now.)


B) The girl I proposed to left 4 months before the wedding. She was listening to a new college friend of hers and he told her that I would make her stay home and have no career (Which was wrong but I didn't know this until a year after). She should have talked to me instead. She ended up hooking up with him; he dumped her after a couple months of fun. She wanted us to talk and maybe repair the relationship. I couldn't because I feel if she did this once, how many more times will she do it again?

C) I'm back to my bad boy phase. As long as girls want to be treated like crap, I'll always have as much as I want with no commitments. But I know, one day, I'll screw up and blow this cover by acting nice - then she'll dump me.

 

[lawaris]

cos' I left my g/f .....or did she leave me ???

 

[CraigRT]

work full time, don't feel like going out much after i get home from work.. i basically don't get out much, in the summer it's alot better, biking in the park and crap, at least i SEE people then. during fall/winter i am just out of it.. no summer activities, no getting out, it just sucks.

 

[mithrandir2001]

Limited interest - I see marriage as something that you are forced into because of societal norms instead something you really want. The high divorce rate suggests that too many people get married for the wrong reasons.
Fear of losing independence/control - Being single means you can do just about anything at anytime. The longer you are single, the harder it is to give that up.
Incompatibility - I've encountered entirely too many superficial females who care little about politics, careers, finance, or intellectual pursuits, nevermind really geeky stuff like computer technology and D&D/LOTR. I don't like sports or NBC's Friends or the club scene. I think and talk like a computer geek and that just sends them running for the exits.
Discomfort - related to above. I cannot stand the stares and twitched noses that women give you when they see you as an awkward geek who is not comfortable breaking ground with strangers. They all seem to want Mr. Svelte who's smooth and chic and stunning.
Shyness - "I am the son and the heir of a shyness that is criminally vulgar"

 

"A) When I was 22 a beautiful, intelligent, funny young woman asked me to marry and her and I laughed because I thought she was joking. I do so much regret that. (We've since stayed friends; she's married to a wonderful guy and has a little boy now.)"

Oh yeah??? Really???? Wow! That's really deep.

I honestly don't see why you had to oblige yourself at that age. That's just too young and you should not regret it if you didn't feel prepared. There's always another for you. Be glad she found a man who was ready and settled with her a new family. Hope theirs last.

Well, back to topic: Single here and love it.

I don't know why many feel they must have someone to validate their lives. I like to be free of the stress, pressure, burden, you name it. When I want a man, I'll find him and take him. For now, I want to be single whilst I'm still young and have some things to accomplish in my life as an individual.

 

[KokomoGST]

My #2 reason for being single is probably not meeting new people of the opposite sex that I may be interested in...
I'm sure a lot of azn guys are like me in that they only feel comfortable dating an azn female of a similar background. (That being a 2nd-3gen immigrant)

Hmm, I guess that makes me incredibly selective too... guess that's #2. I don't date frequently even when I do meet new people, for whatever reason (time/selectiveness/lack of interest). But when I enter a relationship, it's usually long-term though I am kinda bitter about girls... And strangely, out of my friends, a few of them voted me the most likely to marry first, despite being the youngest of that group of friends.

Which brings me to my #1... I'm immature and a "such a GUY" according to my last gf. I am a guy? What's so wrong with that?

 

[CrazyDe1]

Few reasons, first reason is I can't approach a chick for the life of me...I become a retard not knowing what to say. The only way I meet girls is through friends of mine...or if I go out in a group w/ a bunch through a friend. Problem with this is my friends dont' really meet any girls becuase our classes are sausagefests...we're not old enough to hit the bars...and none of us is really that awesome that we can go to a pick up a bunch of girls at a party and bring back some for the rest(in other words we all have no game). One of my best girl friends won't hook me up for the life of me because she says I'm half hers...how the hell does that work?
So this only leaves 1 possibility, girls coming up to you...the few times this has happened it was in another state...and they were in high school. This usually doesnt work becuase they talk to you for awhile...then they move on and talk to other people...and so on until they find some model looking dude and go for him. A few of my girl friends have said we're all good looking...I mean once I meet a girl its usually not a problem...the problem is meeting them...

My other problem is how I look at girls...my take on it is you just try to be friends w/ as many of them as possible and if they have friends they can hook you up with thats fine. You can imagine I have 20 friends but no girlfriend...and they all come to me w/ relationship problems. I don't ever expect anything for fear of getting dissapointed if they don't want anything..so I don't go for anything. Its not usually till awhile later when they're already hooked up w/ other dudes that they come up to me and go I've wanted you for the longest time...and by then its too late. Everytime they won't hook me up w/ their friends either...this has happened like 4-5 times..meet a girl, hangout a lot, dont' make a move, she eventually finds someone who does, she decides even though she is taken she wont' hook me up w/ a friend. Pretty much screws things over for me

 

[Danman]

<< 1) Very busy.
2) Very independent.
3) Since my parent's divorced, I haven't been able to put much faith in relationships.
4) Very shy.
5) Women are automatically repelled by my very presence.
6) Fear of rejection. >>



I used to have these reasons too but I looked at it as trial and error. Yea, I funked up a couple times but I found the girl I really love, and I am soo much happier now.

 

[gotsmack]

Mith



<< "I am the son and the heir of a shyness that is criminally vulgar" >>



Where is this quote from?

I'm single because I have the conversation skillz of a rock. a very small rock

 

[Magicthyse]

Because I like spending all my money on me.
Because I like staggering in at 3am and sleeping on the stairs drooling on the carpet.
Because I think the toilet seat should be left up and lowered only when necessary.
Because I like having a trail of used socks leading from the kitchen to the bedroom.
Because I like scratching my balls as I watch TV.
Because I shouldn't need to release a discreet test fart and leave the room if a public health emergency is about to be precipitated.

And many, many other reasons.

 

[Koing]

<< In 1977 my final year in college I was stunned and amazed by a young lady. It never seemed like work and we never fought or argued. We moved in together in '78 and then in '80 had our first child. In 1982 I had the pleasure of making her my bride. I wake up every morning knowing that I am the luckiest man on this planet. I wish all of you the same. To my bride Dayna thank you for 20 years of bliss. She is the other half of my heart and I would have it no other way.

Don't force relationships, that person is out there and sometimes it may just feel difficult. Over all the years never have a questioned my love for Dayna.

Sorry Off Topic but that is the forum.

>>



that 'very' cool man! Congratulations! especially amongst some not so happy stories....

thats how it is going with me and this girl........

its never work or hard. It comes easy and naturally between us two.....(first time that the relationships been like this the others were not)...

 

[jhu]

I've been single for five years now and I'm having the time of my life. I enjoy myself way more than when I had a steady girlfriend; no one to worry about, no one to get jealous, no one to nag me when I leave the toilet seat up. <http://forums.anandtech.com/i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif> I have several "woman-friends" that I hang out with and enjoy on a regular basis and am free to go wherever and do whatever I want. Could I possibly ask for more? Nope <http://forums.anandtech.com/i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif>

Yes, the naysayers out there will say "well, you're not grown up enough to have an adult relationship because you're avoiding responsibility and honesty," but that's not true. I have very adult relationships with my friends and love them dearly. These women know that they are not the end-all be-all in my life and we basically, we just suck life dry when we're together. Yes, I can love one woman but I find so much more satisfaction in loving more than one woman: All of my needs are satisfied, whether physical, mental or spiritual (and theirs are, too).


friends with benefits? i could use that...

 

[Camay123]

Because im not really an outgoing persons.
Im confident with work, school but when it comes to girl it aint working.
I cant just go and talk to a person like that. I need to meet new people when they are presented to me.

 

[MazerRackham]

I'm single now b/c I just got dissed by my ex. If you're in grad school, NEVER date someone in your own department... NEVER!

I'm working on some new stuff, but nothing concrete yet. Too many intelligent and hot women have boyfriends already!

 

[mithrandir2001]

<<

<< "I am the son and the heir of a shyness that is criminally vulgar" >>


Where is this quote from?

I'm single because I have the conversation skillz of a rock. a very small rock >>


It's a lyric from The Smiths' "How Soon Is Now?" It ranks up there with "I Know It's Over", which produced the timeless "It's so easy to laugh, it's so easy to hate, it takes strength to be gentle and kind." Morrissey's lyrics resonate with a lot of alienated people.

 

[Gonad the Barbarian]

I don't know why I'm single. I'm quite wonderful. And handsome too.

 

[SpecialEd]

I'm in love with like three different girls and it wouldn't be fair to any of them to date them... because I would just think about the other ones while dating her. So I'm stuck being single until I make up my mind on which one I like the best.

 

[GrumpyMan]

Because I am a millionaire, very handsome and have a great personality. That is why I am single.

 

[linuxboy]

Why Are You Single?

It is not my time.

Cheers !

 

[bbarnes]

Cuz I can't get no girls.

 

[nullshark]

<friends with benefits? i could use that... >

It's difficult to start but if you have a lot of women friends (as I do) once it starts happening regularly with one woman, she eventually blabs and then you've got networking going for you

 

[Gulzakar]

dont know...can make girl-friends (not the hyphen) on the drop of a dime, but anything more seems next to immpossible...i get all the attractive mental rejects...I'd gladly sacrifice beauty over someone who is sane!

 

[hzl eyed grl]

<< I don't know why I'm single. I'm quite wonderful. And handsome too. >>


Pics?

 

[holdencommodore]

I guess it's cos i'm pretty shy, don't get me wrong, i would love it if i wasn't single! I'm also pretty boring to talk to.... all i can really talk about is cars and computers... and most girls either don't understand WTF i am talking about or are simply not interested. Plus, i'm at school all the time, and the girls hang around with all the "cool" and "interesting" guys... oh well, maybe my luck will change when i get to uni!

Cheers