Why do parents act like they know what we care about?

[RCN]

Originally posted by: Frostwake
Since trying to prove my point is like saying "god exists because..." im just gonna ask something

What would you "i know/have been through everything and im more experienced then you/not to mention you will fail at life" gurus would do in my place?

At 14 I would have felt like you do.......well with a little less drama and suicidal/ homicidal thoughts.

 

[EngenZerO]

your an idoit...

 

[Jesus the Porkyeti]

Are you angry because someone stole your cloudsong?

 

[sandorski]

Originally posted by: hypn0tik
OP, I understand EXACTLY what you're going through!

I got through the situation by rubbing one out. Best damn jerk I had. I didn't even talk to the girl the next day. I was looking at my right hand as I walked past her thinking, 'Damn, where have you been all these years Righty?' To this day, I have yet to experience a better jerk.

 

[Frostwake]

So again, in seriousness, from her parent's perspective, would you let your daughter go live with a guy who has no plan for supporting her? Seeing as she's the female, a student, and a minor, it would be expected of you to bring home the bacon.

You know, funny you asked that cuz we thought about it as well, i asked her "say we had a daughter and she has this boyfriend she loved deeply and wanted him to come live with her.. would you allow it?" and, she said yes... but not so blindly..say "test it for some time, if we know we can trust him why not?"

I would be careful the first weeks or so and watch them closely, but if it turned out fine then its all good

But again, hypothetically (and seriously) speaking... her parents call you up right now and say they've reconsidered. They'll allow it. What then? Would you immediately pack your bags and head out?

You bet lol you see i dont have the chance to gain their confidence because i cant be with her! Were gonna spend more time together soon, some weeks here some weeks there, lets hope their confidence goes up

 

[uhohs]

Originally posted by: Frostwake

Originally posted by: LadyBuggy

Originally posted by: kranky
Do we know how old the OP and his gf are?

She's underaged and he's not, apparently. Nothing more specific than that, though.

Age is very deceiving, and you should know someone with say 15 and another person with the same 15 can be COMPLETELY different in terms of thinking/maturity (spare me of "which is what you lack " please) and i know that unless i say im 40 and shes 30 everyones gonna loose all credibility

she's 15!?!?!? AWESOME, THIS THREAD GETS BETTER AND BETTER.

 

[altonb1]

Originally posted by: Bryophyte

Originally posted by: Frostwake
WTF, anyone else got tired of hearing "we only want the best for you" and felt like killing them because they have absolutely NO IDEIA WHATSOEVER of your interests?

MOTHER$%&%$& JESUS , seriously if all your parents want is for you to become a graduate anything else you do is unnimportant except for what they think "is the best for you", how about actually trying to think a little bit and remember that each person has their own goals in life? Im so pissed off... Not pissed off for myself, since im not underaged and i can do whatever i #"%$#% want but for my gf who is not, and her parents acting like total retards, and i just feel like getting a gun and shooting it up their ass... Is it so hard for parents to understand that all we want (read - priority number ONE) is to be together? We could do EVERYTHING we needed to after that, but no... they have to be stupid and think all that matters is school and that crap when we cant even stop thinking each other for a second... theres NO WAY IN HELL any of us is gonna do ANYTHING without being together, is it that difficult to grasp? Did parents think their children would be carbon copies of them and act just like wanted to? Do they forget we have our own will and priorities? For me love is WAY ABOVE anything else in life, its what makes life worthy, what makes you feel like you are actually ENJOYING every single moment of your life, and everything else comes after, if things dont turn out so great you still have each other anyway... Thats how things work for me, and thats how things work for her... "First we need to be together, then we will do whatever needs to be done"... And most couples would just give up and be happy with what they have, but we are not and we will do whatever it takes to prove them we're SERIOUS.. whatever it takes... And im pissed off at the fact they cant understand us and they cant understand they are $%&$%& everything up and only making it worse, because they are NOT gonna keep us from being together, theyre probably going to ruin our lives... so much for "whats best for you" crap... Wow ive written too much... just needed to "explode" somewhere and since i was browsing through ATOT ... Thanks for those who leave their point of view on the question, and for those who flame at least try to be funny so i laugh a little

You know, Elsio Arrais of North Carolina, it's things like the bolded parts above that sorely tempts me to go Loke on you and turn you in to either her parents or the police. Do you honestly think that her parents are wrong about how mature you and your underaged girlfriend are? The fact that you wrote the above post shows that you are not mature enough to treat any woman right. The fact that your girlfriend read that post and agreed with it makes me shudder. So she's ok with you killing her parents?

Go Loke on him...do us all a favor....

 

[jagec]

Originally posted by: Frostwake
Have you ever thought i might actually want to experience it myself instead of just taking advices without knowing if they would turn out true or not?

Fine, if you're going to crap over the advice of many, many people, some of whom have gone through the EXACT same thing (don't kid yourself...your love isn't "special" or "unique". That's only true in the movies).

You can learn from your mistakes, or you can be smart and learn from the mistakes of others.

But hey, I won't stop you. My policy is that if you see someone doing something moronic, you warn them, but if they insist on doing it anyway, you take pictures to laugh at. Hence the popularity of "Jackass".

Originally posted by: Frostwake
Because it hurts alot not to be with her and makes all days painfully slow to pass by, waiting for the day ill be with her again, not to mention we cant think of anything else other then us, you see...

I'd estimate that 90% of the human population will experience that at some point in their lives, and thousands of those will experience it a lot more strongly than you do.

 

[Homerboy]

this is what AT has been reduced too? horribly pathetic.

 

[imported_malcontent]

Originally posted by: BooGiMaN
i call shens and point at the troll....who were you before you got banned?

I second the notion.

 

[Frostwake]

So she's ok with you killing her parents?

You know sometimes you dont feel what you say? Seems youve taken it too seriously... ive already said i wouldnt... i was pissed off and thinking like that come out, happens to everyone.. plus im a pacific person believe it or not and id rather kill myself then hurt her.. ever

 

[dawnbug]

Originally posted by: Frostwake

So again, in seriousness, from her parent's perspective, would you let your daughter go live with a guy who has no plan for supporting her? Seeing as she's the female, a student, and a minor, it would be expected of you to bring home the bacon.

You know, funny you asked that cuz we thought about it as well, i asked her "say we had a daughter and she has this boyfriend she loved deeply and wanted him to come live with her.. would you allow it?" and, she said yes... but not so blindly..say "test it for some time, if we know we can trust him why not?"

I would be careful the first weeks or so and watch them closely, but if it turned out fine then its all good

But again, hypothetically (and seriously) speaking... her parents call you up right now and say they've reconsidered. They'll allow it. What then? Would you immediately pack your bags and head out?

You bet lol you see i dont have the chance to gain their confidence because i cant be with her! Were gonna spend more time together soon, some weeks here some weeks there, lets hope their confidence goes up

Are you trying to tell us that you've only been seeing her for a few weeks?

 

[NatePo717]

Originally posted by: Fritzo

Originally posted by: Viper GTS
LMAO this is rich.

If any kid came near my daughters with an attitude like yours he'd leave in a body bag.

Grow the hell up, maybe by the time you accomplish that your girlfriend will be out of school & then you two can continue your little infatuation party.

Viper GTS

OH you know it brother! MAN that kid got my blood boiling. Parents HAVE gone through everything and MORE that their kids have gone through, and now know how to deal with it. Kids think that because it was a different culture back then, their experiences don't relate. WRONG! I was about 25 before I learned that and found out that my parents were almost always right.

I remember my parents telling me that one day I would appoligize to them but they didn't tell me what I would be appoligizing for.... looking back at how I was when I was a kid I feel like I should appoligize to them now....

EDIT: My parents totally rock and I love em to death. I take their advice seriously now as opposed to the 'you don't understand me! You're just being stupid' stuff I did as a teen.

 

[Frostwake]

Are you trying to tell us that you've only been seeing her for a few weeks?

No, im trying to tell you we know each other for a long time but we have only been together a few weeks, because as i said, long distance and having to wait a LONG time to be together again

 

[LumbergTech]

I dont really think I should apologize to my parents for anything...i mean if they would have tried harder as parents then i wouldnt have acted out in the way i did, they simply were crappy parents and my behaviors were a symptom of that as a child ..however..once you become an adult, you must do your best to think about the past and what you dont want to repeat ..dont instill the same garbage into your kids that made you upset when you were a kid..that isnt to say that some things kids think turn out to be wrong, but a lot of it truly is just terrible parenting

 

[CalvinHobbs]

Originally posted by: Atomicus
GOOD parents know best because they've already gone through the part of life that you still have yet to pass.

LOL...nice..remind me of my cousin(he's 17), he felt he knew better than his grilfriend's father who wants his daughter to graduate first then to think of boys, but he was about to try convince her that her dad was an ignorant old fellow, luckily i was able to knock some sense in his mind, gosh and the OP wants to do what "shoot in their @ss", well you seem to forget they were where you are before you and knows what's best for thier daughter, and if i were in their place it's your @ss that would been into pieces! It would be good that you have a daughter later in life and then a guy like you comes into her life!

 

[Vinny N]

Originally posted by: Frostwake
Why do parents act like they know what we care about?

Because they do know what we care about and they're terrified of what crazy things we will do for what we care about. I know it's hard to believe sometimes, and parents are capable of messing up, but they really don't want to hurt their children in any way.


Frostwake, since you only joined in January, I have to ask: Have you read much of this forum? Did you make this thread looking for support? Because I'm afraid for these sorts of threads (and pretty much any YAGT, even plainer ones), this forum has mostly harsh comments/advice and empathy can be a rarity.

 

[dawnbug]

Originally posted by: Frostwake

Are you trying to tell us that you've only been seeing her for a few weeks?

No, im trying to tell you we know each other for a long time but we have only been together a few weeks, because as i said, long distance and having to wait a LONG time to be together again

Stay together for a year or so, then talk about moving in together. You guys are moving way too fast, even if you are the most mature kids in the world. (And if you two were really mature, you wouldn't be moving so fast.)

Edit: And now that we know how long you have been together, can we hear how old you guys are?

 

[dawnbug]

Originally posted by: LumbergTech
I dont really think I should apologize to my parents for anything...i mean if they would have tried harder as parents then i wouldnt have acted out in the way i did, they simply were crappy parents and my behaviors were a symptom of that as a child ..however..once you become an adult, you must do your best to think about the past and what you dont want to repeat ..dont instill the same garbage into your kids that made you upset when you were a kid..that isnt to say that some things kids think turn out to be wrong, but a lot of it truly is just terrible parenting

Maybe if you hadn't acted out the way you did, they would've tried harder as parents.

 

[Frostwake]

t would be good that you have a daughter later in life and then a guy like you comes into her life!

Im curious as well, if i have a daughter id like to know my behavior at the time

 

[Frostwake]

Originally posted by: Vinny N

Originally posted by: Frostwake
Why do parents act like they know what we care about?

Because they do know what we care about and they're terrified of what crazy things we will do for what we care about. I know it's hard to believe sometimes, and parents are capable of messing up, but they really don't want to hurt their children in any way.


Frostwake, since you only joined in January, I have to ask: Have you read much of this forum? Did you make this thread looking for support? Because I'm afraid for these sorts of threads (and pretty much any YAGT, even plainer ones), this forum has mostly harsh comments/advice and empathy can be a rarity.

Thanks for sharing, altough i have no ideia what having children is like, i understand that parents must be terrified when these things come up, but my case isnt a "life or death" thing either, its just... they can make it happen, and if they dont then they do start risking alot more than they should, and nobodys happy in the end

I know ATOT is the worse place for support threads, actually just about every thread here is turned into a pathetic flame fest from what ive seen, ill go look somewhere else where people that have gone through the same and succeded might actually cheer me up and tell me what it was like

 

[dawnbug]

Originally posted by: Frostwake

Originally posted by: Vinny N

Originally posted by: Frostwake
Why do parents act like they know what we care about?

Because they do know what we care about and they're terrified of what crazy things we will do for what we care about. I know it's hard to believe sometimes, and parents are capable of messing up, but they really don't want to hurt their children in any way.


Frostwake, since you only joined in January, I have to ask: Have you read much of this forum? Did you make this thread looking for support? Because I'm afraid for these sorts of threads (and pretty much any YAGT, even plainer ones), this forum has mostly harsh comments/advice and empathy can be a rarity.

Thanks for sharing, altough i have no ideia what having children is like, i understand that parents must be terrified when these things come up, but my case isnt a "life or death" thing either, its just... they can make it happen, and if they dont then they do start risking alot more than they should, and nobodys happy in the end

I know ATOT is the worse place for support threads, actually just about every thread here is turned into a pathetic flame fest from what ive seen, ill go look somewhere else where people that have gone through the same and succeded might actually cheer me up and tell me what it was like

Heh, I told you a few pages ago that I'd gone through a similar situation, and that I discovered that the best solution to the situation was to observe the parents' wishes and wait. How tough is that to figure out?

 

[jagec]

Originally posted by: Frostwake
I know ATOT is the worse place for support threads, actually just about every thread here is turned into a pathetic flame fest from what ive seen, ill go look somewhere else where people that have gone through the same and succeded might actually cheer me up and tell me what it was like

Good luck finding such a place :laugh:


/edit: Wait, I forgot the trailer park. Try there.

 

[altonb1]

Originally posted by: Frostwake

Originally posted by: Vinny N

Originally posted by: Frostwake
Why do parents act like they know what we care about?

Because they do know what we care about and they're terrified of what crazy things we will do for what we care about. I know it's hard to believe sometimes, and parents are capable of messing up, but they really don't want to hurt their children in any way.


Frostwake, since you only joined in January, I have to ask: Have you read much of this forum? Did you make this thread looking for support? Because I'm afraid for these sorts of threads (and pretty much any YAGT, even plainer ones), this forum has mostly harsh comments/advice and empathy can be a rarity.

Thanks for sharing, altough i have no ideia what having children is like, i understand that parents must be terrified when these things come up, but my case isnt a "life or death" thing either, its just... they can make it happen, and if they dont then they do start risking alot more than they should, and nobodys happy in the end

I know ATOT is the worse place for support threads, actually just about every thread here is turned into a pathetic flame fest from what ive seen, ill go look somewhere else where people that have gone through the same and succeded might actually cheer me up and tell me what it was like

That's the part you don't get--where are you going to find someone that has gone thought this and has succeded?

 

[everman]

I didn't open this thread because I was pretty sure about what I'd find inside by the looks of the title and rapid increase of post count.

Yep I was right