Why do people who commit suicide seem like they have some sort of inside info that we don't know?

[Kaido]

Question to you guys that have experienced and are describing for us what it's like to suffer from major depression.

Would you say that your depression or mental illnesses would change if tomorrow you wake up and are all of a sudden in an entirely different situation. Few examples - but certainly not limited to these:
1) You wake up and are a soldier that is deployed - you are in a platoon with your close friends you've made over the months of being forced to be together.
2) You wake up and are in the middle of a random nation (middle-east, India, China, Europe even). You have jack shit for money.
3) You wake up on a tropical island you own as a successful businessman - but a very busy one - with a banging hot 10/10 wife and multiple kids.

I'm just genuinely curious how a depressed mind acts when all of the things that previously messed with their brain chemicals are instantly replaced with questions like "Oh, how will I eat?". Not insinuating it will, just opening a discussion. As someone that has had my own neurological issues - I can definitely say when you change a situation - my brain certainly doesn't act the same as it once did.

Personally, I think that pretty much everyone will go through a period of depression in their life, no matter what your situation is in this world - even if you're working in a sweat-shop in a third-world country or if you're a famous multi-millionaire. It's almost like a rite of passage in the human experience. The trigger may be different (loss of a loved one, health issue, or other change in your situation), but it kind of forces you to grow up & mature in certain ways, and to re-evaluate your life & what's important & what isn't.

Depression is weird because it's not quite as advertised. It's not always 100% numbness across the board. There are peaks & valleys. Distractions feel good, which is why many people use vices like alcohol or drugs, or spend endless hours online or at casinos or playing video games - it makes you forget about your problems for awhile & at least lets you enjoy some level of comfort from not having to think about your situation or how you're feeling.

It's also a dangerous trap, because you don't feel like doing anything & you don't feel like trying, so you work yourself into a viscous cycle where you eat poorly, stay up too late, don't get enough sleep, don't exercise, and eventually start being late to things & not taking care of yourself. Moreso in first-world countries, because we have more creature comforts. In really bad parts of the world, if you're facing hunger or danger, that's a painful daily reminder against caving into laziness. In places like the United States, most people have access to fast food, television sets, etc. and are able to easily access "braindead mode", where you do the bare minimum required to survive, but you're maybe not so happy about it.

I've talked about this in other posts, but I'll summarize here...I call the thing that goes missing the "warm-fuzzy". Most of us have the warm-fuzzy as kids...you don't really think about existential crises & can bounce back from depressive episodes pretty easily, whether it's getting dumped by your girlfriend or dropping the ball on something at school or whatever. Depression happens when you don't bounce back. Sometimes that's because you get a disease, or a friend or family member passes away, or PTSD from combat or being involved in an accident, or even seemingly smaller things like losing a girlfriend. I know a guy who went into a depressive episode & dropped out of school for semester because his long-term girlfriend dumped him & he was so heartbroken that he just couldn't bootstrap himself back into the swing of things.

I think that as adults, we have more responsibility over the care & feeding of our own warm-fuzzy. We not only have to take care of our physical bodies by managing our stress levels, practicing good sleep hygiene, eating well, and exercising on a regular basis, but we also have to think about what motivates us, what makes us happy, how we want our attitude to be, and what our mission in life is. Half of it is how good you feel - because when you don't feel good, nothing is very fun - and half of it is our attitude & how we think about things & what we decided & discover really makes us happy. And sometimes there's that extra 10% where we need extra help, like seeing a doctor or a therapist or going on some medication, or just hanging in there & getting through whatever rough patch you're currently going through.

I think that both having depression & managing depression has a lot more to do with our personal choices than in our particular situation, whether you're a billionaire on your own island or a soldier in combat or just another name in a nation of a billion people. There's a dude named Viktor Frankl who survived a Nazi death camp & wrote an excellent book called "Man's search for meaning". A little bit of an introduction & discussion here:

http://benjaminmcevoy.com/7-lessons-learned-mans-search-meaning-viktor-e-frankl-book-review/

Now, having meaning in life is a big question, and it's to stall out on that question for the rest of your life, but that doesn't mean that you can't build up a foundation of meaning in your own life. What do you like to do for fun? How do you like to contribute to society? How do you want to live your life? Nobody was put on this planet just to survive...we're humans...we're meant to thrive & share & grow & experience life, to enjoy thing & to help other people & to mature. And I think part of that growth cycle includes at least one period of depression for everyone who shows up on this earth, and I think part of growing up & maturing is learning how to deal with that.

It's easy to get stuck in an endless loop of depression. It's like a hamster wheel...you keep spinning in the same place, but you're getting nowhere & you're not moving forward. You can't always change your situation or what's happened to you or what's currently happening to you, but you can hang tight & you can change the way you think about it. I like to read a lot of self-help stuff because I think it's fascinating that we can literally change our lives & change how we feel simply by changing the way we think. One of the biggest books that made an impression on me was "Attitude is everything" by Jeff Keller:

https://www.amazon.com/Attitude-Everything-Change-Your-Life/dp/0979041031

I mean, everyone's situation is different, but the one constant is that we can choose to how think, which controls our attitude & our actions. We can choose to be the victim ("this is why I can't do X") or the victor ("how can I achieve X?"). While I don't think that everyone's problems can magically be solved by thinking & feeling our way out of things, as many here on our forums can attest to with different family, health, and job situations, I do think our attitudes & our decisions about how we want to live our lives contributes quite a bit to our experience while we are alive, no matter if you're a successful businessman on a tropical island or living in poverty in a war-torn country.

 

[snoopy7548]

On a less serious note, maybe they put the glasses on...

 

[Kaido]

Really good article on Medium here:

Why people kill themselves by Dr. Mark Goulston

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

Really good article on Medium here:

Why people kill themselves by Dr. Mark Goulston

This article actually goes back to my previous point of wanting attention and really just proves my point. See my bolded items below.

I can’t guarantee it, but I think the reason an approach I used in meeting with highly suicidal individuals — many who were multiple attempters — was effective was that instead of giving them treatments and procedures that would often be a way to deal with my own anxiety, I learned to listen into their eyes for their hurt, fear, anger, pain, guilt and shame. When I did that, one or more were always present and always screaming to be heard, and even more, to be felt so they didn’t have to feel so alone in hell.

When they “felt felt” and less alone, suffering they couldn’t deal with became pain they could.

People will probably have misinferred what I meant when I said "attention whoring" - but this is precisely what I was talking about. Anyone else here married with a wife that likes that to talk? I have an extrovert for a wife - I think many married males here can usually relate to this in that plenty of times your wife just wants to go home and vent about her day to you.

One of the things I noticed is when I traveled more for work - or I just started getting out of tune when she had a story to tell that wasn't interesting to me... It would really upset her. Why is that? Why is the approval of other people such a breaking point for some people? To tie this back with the quote above - the wife doesn't want me to give advice on how I would handle a situation or conflict either. She just wants me to listen and "feel the pain" so-to-speak... and mostly nod my head and agree that whatever she is thinking is the correct action.

I'm undoubtedly a full blown introvert. I have zero fucks to give in life if someone doesn't want to listen to me - mostly because I don't want to tell them a story to begin with. So it's obvious that this isn't something I can necessarily relate to. But as I said, your article seems to match with what I was talking about.

 

[Kaido]

Anyone else here married with a wife that likes that to talk? I have an extrovert for a wife - I think many married males here can usually relate to this in that plenty of times your wife just wants to go home and vent about her day to you.

One of the things I noticed is when I traveled more for work - or I just started getting out of tune when she had a story to tell that wasn't interesting to me... It would really upset her. Why is that? Why is the approval of other people such a breaking point for some people? To tie this back with the quote above - the wife doesn't want me to give advice on how I would handle a situation or conflict either. She just wants me to listen and "feel the pain" so-to-speak... and mostly nod my head and agree that whatever she is thinking is the correct action.

There's a short video that covers that exact topic perfectly:

 

[eng2d2]

This article actually goes back to my previous point of wanting attention and really just proves my point. See my bolded items below.



People will probably have misinferred what I meant when I said "attention whoring" - but this is precisely what I was talking about. Anyone else here married with a wife that likes that to talk? I have an extrovert for a wife - I think many married males here can usually relate to this in that plenty of times your wife just wants to go home and vent about her day to you.

One of the things I noticed is when I traveled more for work - or I just started getting out of tune when she had a story to tell that wasn't interesting to me... It would really upset her. Why is that? Why is the approval of other people such a breaking point for some people? To tie this back with the quote above - the wife doesn't want me to give advice on how I would handle a situation or conflict either. She just wants me to listen and "feel the pain" so-to-speak... and mostly nod my head and agree that whatever she is thinking is the correct action.

I'm undoubtedly a full blown introvert. I have zero fucks to give in life if someone doesn't want to listen to me - mostly because I don't want to tell them a story to begin with. So it's obvious that this isn't something I can necessarily relate to. But as I said, your article seems to match with what I was talking about.

Although I agree but I have to say not all are like that. Only some high profile suicide. some people here in this board that has depression have a different issue.

 

[Mayne]

Thanks guys for the replies, especially Kaido's. I think i've been suffering for a while now. Even though the animals have been gone for 3 weeks now, i still have lots of anxiety..and my eyes/health aren't helping. but i'm working on it.

 

[Kaido]

Thanks guys for the replies, especially Kaido's. I think i've been suffering for a while now. Even though the animals have been gone for 3 weeks now, i still have lots of anxiety..and my eyes/health aren't helping. but i'm working on it.

I mean it's good & bad. It's bad because it stinks to have to go through, but at the same time, it's a good time to re-assess your life & start thinking about what really matters to you, and then to adjust your life according to what really makes you happy. I think most of us grow up very reactionary...we respond to our family situation, jobs that come along, attitudes we grow up with, etc., and when things change, we kind of realize we've drifted into the life we have. And when you hit that point, it's a good time to create your own design for your life. Basically to become the CEO of your life & start actively calling the shots for your health, your job, your hobbies, how you run your household, etc.

Hang in there man! It gets better.

 

[Mayne]

Thanks Kaido. I am starting to call my own shots now, I can't worry about people that don't care about me.

 

[Kaido]

Thanks Kaido. I am starting to call my own shots now, I can't worry about people that don't care about me.

It's hard because you feel invested, given whatever history you have with them, but it starts with (1) recognizing that you DO worry about people who don't care about you & that you don't want to anymore, and (2) deciding that it's OK to feel that way, right now, but that is no longer your default choice & that you are making the decision to let that go. Deciding to let it go & not hold on to those feelings, even if you don't feel like you can, is probably one of the hardest things we ever have to do in life, because it requires an internal change from us instead of having other people change. If you feel like some hefty reading, this is a really good book on the subject:

https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-New-Mood-Therapy/dp/0380731762

The basic ideas the author presents are:

1. Thoughts create feelings.

2. At some point, you encountered a situation, you had a thought about that, and that thought converted to an emotion, and so when you run into that situation, you feel an emotion about it.

3. You can change how you feel by changing how you think about things.

If you want to dive deeper into it, the same author has a workbook that actually walks you through those ideas by capturing trigger situations (through writing) & then basically shining a light on why you feel that way by figuring out why you think the way you do about a certain situation, because off the top of your head you may be like nah, that doesn't happen to me, but once you really audit yourself over the course of a week or two, you'll start to reverse-engineer your emotional reactions & see how your thinking creates worry, stress, anxiety, over-reactions, and so on. This workbook would be right up your alley, because you're already used to writing, with how much you post in OT, so you're already good about asking questions & discussing stuff online - this is just kind of doing the same thing with yourself & the situations that are bothering you personally:

https://www.amazon.com/Days-Self-Esteem-David-Burns-M-D/dp/0688094554/

It's not an overnight process because your brain has been wired to react & feel a certain way for so long, but like I said in my earlier post, we can choose how we approach things by changing our attitude, and by being willing to change our attitude. It's hard to even want to let go of how we feel sometimes because it's kind of fun to wallow around in depression & feel bittersweet anger about things because we're all kind of little kids inside & like to let ourselves off the hook for having to do anything about a situation. It's fun to feel justified or just bitter in general. But the only person's time you're wasting is your own. The sooner you start thinking about how you think about a situation, the sooner you can change how you feel about that situation, and the easier it gets to move on.

Dang, I sound like Yoda now, haha. But it's not gobbly-beloved patriot or hippie stuff. And it happens in a lot of different areas in life. I saw my buddy's roommate get desensitized to life over time because of what he chose to expose himself to on the Internet...he started watching a lot of Liveleak & those "watch people die" & gory real-life type of videos. He spent waaaay too much time watching & reading & posting a lot of negative stuff on the worst parts of reddit & 4chan & whatnot, instead of getting out into life & contributing to anything useful other than his required hourly paycheck for rent & food. Just kind of turned into a hermit with a bad outlook on life & was probably depressed on some level. I mean, everyone's free to choose what they want, and not everyone sinks deeper emotionally into the pit of despair from exposure to that type of stuff, but if you recognize you're not feeling how you want to feel or you're not in a situation you want to be in, it's sometimes useful to perform a self-audit & give some thought to how you want things to be & then to shift gears to get back on track.

I think the next generation of kids is going to suffer from even more anxiety & depression than we do because they grow up in a world of social media where "likes" help determine their self-esteem.

 

[Red Squirrel]

Question to you guys that have experienced and are describing for us what it's like to suffer from major depression.

Would you say that your depression or mental illnesses would change if tomorrow you wake up and are all of a sudden in an entirely different situation. Few examples - but certainly not limited to these:
1) You wake up and are a soldier that is deployed - you are in a platoon with your close friends you've made over the months of being forced to be together.
2) You wake up and are in the middle of a random nation (middle-east, India, China, Europe even). You have jack shit for money.
3) You wake up on a tropical island you own as a successful businessman - but a very busy one - with a banging hot 10/10 wife and multiple kids.

I'm just genuinely curious how a depressed mind acts when all of the things that previously messed with their brain chemicals are instantly replaced with questions like "Oh shit, how will I eat?". Not insinuating it will, just opening a discussion. As someone that has had my own neurological issues - I can definitely say when you change a situation - my brain certainly doesn't act the same as it once did.

I don't think none of those things would have changed it for me. When you're in that state of mind nothing really matters, it's like all the "happy" receptors in your brain are turned off. It's kinda messed.

I've always dreamed of living off grid and having an awesome property in the woods, essentially a lake front cottage that I just build into an oasis, and live there. During my depression I was actually thinking about, if I had that, I would not even be happier. I would actually feel more lonely. Now that I'm recovered I still think it would be awesome, but it did make me realize that if I do that, I don't want to be very far from town and I'd have to force myself to socialize more. Of course I think my main thing is to try to get more daylight, and UVB. Even if I generate them artificially in winter, need to stimulate serotonin generation as I think that was my main issue that lead to depression. It's dark before 5pm for most of the year and only starts to be bright past 8am. That means if I'm working day shift I don't see daylight. If I'm working night shift, I don't see daylight either because I'll be sleeping and wake up after sun set. Even on my days off because I was always in night shift mode, by the time I'd get up it was dark.

Made a few life style changes that I'll have to keep up through winter when it will be more critical. Basically going to work much less night shifts now, and force myself to get up earlier on days off. Also force myself to spend time outside even if it's cold. Going for a walk etc. Won't really get any vitamin D when wearing a full parka, but the full spectrum daylight entering the eyes actually does stimulate serotonin production. I can use UVB bulbs on my skin to get vitamin D, along with tablets. I also bought a SAD light for at work so I can use it at the start of my shifts. I'm hoping all these changes will prevent me from entering depression again next year. In my case though, it's probably easier than some other people have it, since I don't have clinical depression or anything. Clinical depression is a whole other beast. I don't think any of the things like UVB light will do anything for those that suffer from that.

 

[Mai72]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_HkQ4-x4P4

I love Alan Watt's view on suicide and death.

 

[Muse]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_HkQ4-x4P4

I love Alan Watt's view on suicide and death.

He's generally all over any topic he went for. An incite a minute.

 

[Mai72]

It's hard because you feel invested, given whatever history you have with them, but it starts with (1) recognizing that you DO worry about people who don't care about you & that you don't want to anymore, and (2) deciding that it's OK to feel that way, right now, but that is no longer your default choice & that you are making the decision to let that go. Deciding to let it go & not hold on to those feelings, even if you don't feel like you can, is probably one of the hardest things we ever have to do in life, because it requires an internal change from us instead of having other people change. If you feel like some hefty reading, this is a really good book on the subject:

https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-New-Mood-Therapy/dp/0380731762

The basic ideas the author presents are:

1. Thoughts create feelings.

2. At some point, you encountered a situation, you had a thought about that, and that thought converted to an emotion, and so when you run into that situation, you feel an emotion about it.

3. You can change how you feel by changing how you think about things.

If you want to dive deeper into it, the same author has a workbook that actually walks you through those ideas by capturing trigger situations (through writing) & then basically shining a light on why you feel that way by figuring out why you think the way you do about a certain situation, because off the top of your head you may be like nah, that doesn't happen to me, but once you really audit yourself over the course of a week or two, you'll start to reverse-engineer your emotional reactions & see how your thinking creates worry, stress, anxiety, over-reactions, and so on. This workbook would be right up your alley, because you're already used to writing, with how much you post in OT, so you're already good about asking questions & discussing stuff online - this is just kind of doing the same thing with yourself & the situations that are bothering you personally:

https://www.amazon.com/Days-Self-Esteem-David-Burns-M-D/dp/0688094554/

It's not an overnight process because your brain has been wired to react & feel a certain way for so long, but like I said in my earlier post, we can choose how we approach things by changing our attitude, and by being willing to change our attitude. It's hard to even want to let go of how we feel sometimes because it's kind of fun to wallow around in depression & feel bittersweet anger about things because we're all kind of little kids inside & like to let ourselves off the hook for having to do anything about a situation. It's fun to feel justified or just bitter in general. But the only person's time you're wasting is your own. The sooner you start thinking about how you think about a situation, the sooner you can change how you feel about that situation, and the easier it gets to move on.

Dang, I sound like Yoda now, haha. But it's not gobbly-************ or hippie stuff. And it happens in a lot of different areas in life. I saw my buddy's roommate get desensitized to life over time because of what he chose to expose himself to on the Internet...he started watching a lot of Liveleak & those "watch people die" & gory real-life type of videos. He spent waaaay too much time watching & reading & posting a lot of negative stuff on the worst parts of reddit & 4chan & whatnot, instead of getting out into life & contributing to anything useful other than his required hourly paycheck for rent & food. Just kind of turned into a hermit with a bad outlook on life & was probably depressed on some level. I mean, everyone's free to choose what they want, and not everyone sinks deeper emotionally into the pit of despair from exposure to that type of stuff, but if you recognize you're not feeling how you want to feel or you're not in a situation you want to be in, it's sometimes useful to perform a self-audit & give some thought to how you want things to be & then to shift gears to get back on track.

I think the next generation of kids is going to suffer from even more anxiety & depression than we do because they grow up in a world of social media where "likes" help determine their self-esteem.

I agree.

Negativity is our default way of thinking, and that's because it kept us alive since the beginning of time. Positivity OTOH is something entirely different and we need to call for it. It's more difficult to obtain and we need to put ourselves in a different state of mind. We need to be much more aware of it. Focusing on negative "crap" is bad, and sadly it's what many people do. They focus on stuff that serves no purpose in their lives. That's why we need to be very careful of the things that we let in our minds. Those live leak videos are awful, and wathing those daily will rewire your mind to think like that. It's why I stopped watching stuff like that, and it's the same with music, movies, the people I hung out with. All negative,a nd it was having a terrible impact on my life. So, I cut it out. We are just now finding out how the brain works. The processed foods that we eat has a negaive impact on our brains as well. Have you ever watched the average American walking about? Negative, they hardly smile, depressed. Not all of course. I have to constantly remind myself to smile at times, because I constanttly default into my negative mindset of unhappiness. If I'm consciouness about this, what about the average person? They don't stand a chance. We become what we think about.

 

[Mai72]

He's generally all over any topic he went for. An incite a minute.

Alan was definitely out there, but then again all deep thinkers like Alan are a little crazy. He talked about topics that most people would rather ignore. Death, suicide, depression, the meaning of life.

 

[Muse]

This is the closest response posted thus far that seems reasonable to me.

I've been depressed and suicidal quite a few times. There's an overwhelming "literally nothing anywhere is ok" feeling. There's little-to-no reason to believe that improvement is possible (much less likely). It has nothing to do with money, or wanting attention. It's complete and utter despair. It's not possible to apply logic and reason to it, and it can't be "cured" or mitigated using any kind of objective reasoning; everything about depression is subjective. Long-term work on the underlying reasons for the depression (be those chemical, or earnest beliefs, or deep-seated fears, or whatever) is the only thing I think ever really helps (in my personal opinion and experience).

"The soul of sweet delight can never be defiled." - William Blake

I have been depressed at times and it can be demoralizing. I am seldom depressed for more than moments anymore. I am wiser than to believe that life is hopeless.

Stephen Hawking — 'However bad life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at. Where there's life, there's hope.'

 

[Muse]

Alan was definitely out there, but then again all deep thinkers like Alan are a little crazy. He talked about topics that most people would rather ignore. Death, suicide, depression, the meaning of life.

He had a wonderful sense of humor, the ability to see the gist of a topic because he saw it from so many perspectives that he ultimately unraveled the mystery surrounding it. He did his homework and would come up with the most wonderful stories to illustrate his points.

 

[Muse]

He's the one saying you could buy yourself out of any kind of sadness as a materialistic American, not me, so I don't know what you are on about.

he is a shallow caveman, i'll stick by that analysis.

Why bother passing judgment on people? It's hard not to, I know, I do it too, all the time, but I often realize it's really pointless. In fact, you are seldom right when you do. I recall a great line in The Philadelphia Story (movie), "the time to make your mind up about people is never."

 

[William Gaatjes]

I just don't understand it. What do they know that we don't know?

Well Mayne, speaking from my own experience.
Sometimes it is that you feel no joy in anything you do, even the things you are supposed to love.
The people you care for do not make you happy when you see them.
The pets you have, do nothing. No emotional response. Just that everlasting void that you feel inside your body.
The work brings you no joy. The games mean nothing to you. The hobby means nothing to you. The best food could be cardboard and i would not notice.
You have no energy. But you must go on.
My brain would just stop, i could not think. Just be aware of everything and feel only sadness or nothing at all. I felt hollow and sometimes wondered if i would carve my chest if blood would spill or that i would be confronted with an icy void within. Of course i did not do such a thing. And although i had thoughts of ending my life, i never did it because i feel that is the worst choice anyone can make.
But i do understand why people do it. In my case, i would put my self in a lot of risky situations. For the thrill perhaps... Only to feel content again with my happy home.
To be able to do calculations again in thoughts. To be able to relate.

In my case, in the past i fled into a world of alcohol and sometimes cocaine as a means of self medication. I used to do weed and alcohol before that.
It was all self medication to be able to keep going. Luckily i wised up enough to realize my life was passing by on me.
I went to seek help as well. And it was a mess. They forgot about me. 2 months later i got a psychologist who had no interest at all.
So i went downhill and 2 years after that i got a psychologist who actually noticed what was going on.
Now i know i have some degree of autism and i know that i cannot always connect with people because their interests are too much for me even to emulate any kind of interest in them.
I have also accepted that not everybody can be a friend and that some have ulterior motives.
Also, i have medicines and i only really need to take them when i feel it coming up. When it starts, it means weeks without a normal sleep pattern, tired all the time and a personality change.
An adjusted life style is very imported and i am glad i decided to stop with alcohol as well (and all the other stuff). Now i only drink a bit once every few months.

I sometimes get up with a dark cloud in my head wondering what i do on this planet, but i for myself have accepted that that is one of the many puzzles i must solve before it is my time to sleep forever.

On the other hand, i have also after these periods of unhappiness that i would have so much energy and creativity that i could not stop.
But what usually happens is that after that, a big crash happens that i am feeling the same as before again.
And this has happened to me since childhood.

Most people experience depression once and get over it. Some stay to linger in it forever. Not their conscience choice. They just seem not able to crawl out of that pit.
Other people get in and out of depression all the time but not manic. Others are manic depressed.
It is very difficult.

For me, i changed jobs a lot because i was incredibly bored and unhappy, usually every 3 years i would just quit. But i always found a new job and continued working and have never used any kind of disability or support. My current job, i work here now 9 and a half years.

edit, i forgot the headaches that come with it or the feeling that my whole body is electrified and i just cannot relax at all. Or tired and sleepy all day and being wide awake at night, fully energized only to wear off when it slowly is becoming daylight. (edit : means, i have to get out of bed for the daily routine)

 

[Mayne]

I don't know anymore guys. I think i have some serious health issues i'm putting off. pains in weird places, eyes that i can barely see out of. I need to get better but if i stop working now, how will i pay the rent? It's fucking my head up. I'll figure it out as usual.

 

[Mayne]

how did this turn into a mayne's 2 a day thread?

 

[madoka]

I don't know anymore guys. I think i have some serious health issues i'm putting off. pains in weird places, eyes that i can barely see out of. I need to get better but if i stop working now, how will i pay the rent? It's fucking my head up.

All this after only four straight days of eating the same batch of chili? Get it together man! I predicted you'd last 10 days before contemplating suicide.

 

[William Gaatjes]

Neural pathways, like muscles, grow and are reinforced with use. So repeatedly using particular type of thinking reinforces and strengthens that thinking in one's brain and personality. And as we all know from being involved with online forums: facts and figures can be chosen to back up almost any line of thinking.

So imagine honestly believing something as simple as "life is shit". A convincing argument for this can be made by choosing what to focus upon, and this belief can be held for months/years/decades. The belief that the world would be a better place without you isn't a far stretch from this; since people who believe "life is shit" also understand family and society doesn't work like that.

Reinforce with every negative thought. And negative thoughts are more likely with reinforcement.

I agree with you that the kind of thoughts you have enforce your state of mind.
If you think constantly negative, it will add to your state of mind.
If a person is susceptible to depression and has a negative attitude towards everything, then changes are that person will get a depression again and again or never come out even with medicines.

It is very important to find a proper balance with having a realistic view on subjects/ matters/ life and have an optimistic view on subject / matters /life to be able to function.
Even if you are susceptible to depression, this will help a lot.
Also, goals are important as is discipline. It will not cure depression but it helps patients with depression to move forward. Especially in times that there is no joy at all.

And for the other posters that claim medicines are bad, that is not entirely true. It is the wrong kind of help and support that is the issue.
that is because how these medicines work.
These medicines empower you and over time improve your state of mind to a more positive emotional well being.
Now imagine, that you are depressed and you want to commit suicide. If some psychiatrist prescribe some medicine and the empowering part of the medicine kicks in earlier than the emotional well being part. Then you get a depressive patient with suicidal thoughts that did not have the strength to commit suicide and was not impulsive at all, but now is empowered to take action, feels more energetic but still depressive and suicidal. So, what can happen is that such a patient impulsively decides to commit suicide. Depressive patients with suicidal thoughts must always be taken into hospital and monitored all the time.

 

[Ancalagon44]

Question to you guys that have experienced and are describing for us what it's like to suffer from major depression.

Would you say that your depression or mental illnesses would change if tomorrow you wake up and are all of a sudden in an entirely different situation. Few examples - but certainly not limited to these:
1) You wake up and are a soldier that is deployed - you are in a platoon with your close friends you've made over the months of being forced to be together.
2) You wake up and are in the middle of a random nation (middle-east, India, China, Europe even). You have jack shit for money.
3) You wake up on a tropical island you own as a successful businessman - but a very busy one - with a banging hot 10/10 wife and multiple kids.

I'm just genuinely curious how a depressed mind acts when all of the things that previously messed with their brain chemicals are instantly replaced with questions like "Oh shit, how will I eat?". Not insinuating it will, just opening a discussion. As someone that has had my own neurological issues - I can definitely say when you change a situation - my brain certainly doesn't act the same as it once did.

Suicide kills more soldiers than combat does. That should show you something. The time when a soldier's life is most at risk is when he comes home from a deployment and is surrounded by family and friends.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

Suicide kills more soldiers than combat does. That should show you something. The time when a soldier's life is most at risk is when he comes home from a deployment and is surrounded by family and friends.