Why do people who commit suicide seem like they have some sort of inside info that we don't know?

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MagnusTheBrewer

IN MEMORIAM
Jun 19, 2004
24,135
1,594
126
They don't know anything different than their friends or family, they just assign way too much importance to the downside of that information. It's a mental illness.
 

Red Squirrel

No Lifer
May 24, 2003
67,895
12,365
126
www.anyf.ca
Suppose it depends on the reason. After going through a depression myself, I think sometimes people do it because they literally have zero motivation for nothing and are bored to the point that it's torture. When I was depressed that's how I felt, and I felt like the only way to stop it was to commit suicide. It was basically an overwhelming sadness I could not figure out why, coupled with extreme lack of motivation to do anything, even live. I did not actually want to commit suicide, and didn't try, but it felt like it may be the only way out. It's a really scary place to be and I think often times some people simply go through with it instead of getting help, or maybe help is not available. Like I don't know what I would have done without my family when I was feeling that way. I had called a counselor but the appointment was like a month down the line.

I'm slowly starting to wean off medication now actually. I'm going to go for another week then hopefully I'm good to get off it completely. For me, I'd say it's easier than what others go through though because I literally have nothing to actually be depressed about. I think for me it was seasonal affective disorder. Guess I'm getting older now so things like not seeing daylight for weeks on end took a toll on me. Now that it's summer I see daylight so that's helping, but will need to make use of artificial lighting in winter and get more vitamin D to compensate. Full spectrum and blue light ("daylight" bulbs may work) and UVB light are both important to try to get.
 

richaron

Golden Member
Mar 27, 2012
1,357
329
136
Neural pathways, like muscles, grow and are reinforced with use. So repeatedly using particular type of thinking reinforces and strengthens that thinking in one's brain and personality. And as we all know from being involved with online forums: facts and figures can be chosen to back up almost any line of thinking.

So imagine honestly believing something as simple as "life is shit". A convincing argument for this can be made by choosing what to focus upon, and this belief can be held for months/years/decades. The belief that the world would be a better place without you isn't a far stretch from this; since people who believe "life is shit" also understand family and society doesn't work like that.

Reinforce with every negative thought. And negative thoughts are more likely with reinforcement.
 

snoopy7548

Diamond Member
Jan 1, 2005
8,087
5,084
146
Sometimes you just run out of "fight". The effort to interact with others, to appear "ok". To just carry on every day, even though it takes every thing you have to even get out of bed, or to eat, or talk, or to sleep.. Eventually you have no strength left. When every day seems worse than yesterday, and everything inside you is telling you tomorrow will be worse.... Can you tell me how you'd cope with this, for weeks, for years, for decades?

This is a good explanation. Depression takes its toll on you. You can appear happy but it's still there, even when things are going well for you and you're in a better state of mind, it's still there. Some people are better at coping or hiding it than others, but it will always catch up to you, and sometimes just a small thing needs to happen to trigger that.

With depression comes recurring thoughts. You're constantly thinking negative thoughts about nearly everything, and you have little control over them. Buying things or doing fun things might make you forget about them for a while, but they always come back. Along with this comes anxiety, which is worsened by any sort of stress. All it takes is something unexpected and out of your control to go bad, and all of a sudden all of those bad thoughts just come flooding in at once, overwhelming you. The strongest person could deal with this once, twice, or ten times, but at some point they'll completely fall apart.

Combine this with a history of drug addiction, which brings its own set of horrible mental problems, and it should be easy to see why somebody would think suicide is a way out.
 

bfun_x1

Senior member
May 29, 2015
475
155
116
Its all chemicals in the brain not hard to have a wacky molecule here or there. It's amazing any of us are sane or not depressed.

Right. It seems like a simple thing for the brain to get messed up. We know about 1% of people can't feel empathy for other human beings. It stands to reason that at least 1% of people might lack empathy for themselves.
 

MrSquished

Lifer
Jan 14, 2013
21,902
20,198
136
I've contemplated suicide before. And just over a year ago I was in the planning stages again, except I reached out to a friend and the next morning he came and picked me up and checked me into a hospital.

I have bipolar I with rapid cycling and really bad depressive stages plus these crazy mixed mania modes that are brutal on the mind, and fought alcohol addiction as well.

It's literally pain you feel inside your body. I remember waking up just crying and repeating the words 'I just want to die' over and over again because the pain was unbearable. I mean uncontrollable sobbing and wailing for hours. I mean it's 3 in the morning and you just want to die and your heart is literally aching to death. Hopelessness is the word I would use to describe it. If there was a button to press and it would be clean and painless, I'd be dead right now for sure. There is no light, just darkness.
 
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Noah Abrams

Golden Member
Feb 15, 2018
1,041
109
76
Right. It seems like a simple thing for the brain to get messed up. We know about 1% of people can't feel empathy for other human beings. It stands to reason that at least 1% of people might lack empathy for themselves.

Psychopaths are rarely suicidal.
 

eng2d2

Golden Member
Nov 7, 2013
1,007
38
91
this is correct and also lack of faith in god. Having faith makes you not want to commit suicide. I will not debate the existence of god.
I know I'm probably going to sound like an asshole here - but I've kinda centered on and have realized that that many suicides are due in part to an attention whoring personality that goes too far. It's never enough. They can never fully fill that void.

Perfect examples are celebrities in general - Robin Williams, Linkin Park singer (Chester), list goes on and on. What could they possibly have in life that is depressing? You could literally BUY anything to solve any potential problems. It really just sounds like an endless void of attention seeking that they can never fully fill.

To me - it honestly makes perfect sense with people who choose to change genders. It's not about society not "accepting" them IMO - it's just attention seeking. Mr. Jenner is (yet another) perfect example. It wasn't for any reason other than attention. Connect that with the suicide rate in third world countries being microscopic compared to first world ones. It's almost as if people have too much shit to worry about instead of "how will I feed myself?".
 

MrSquished

Lifer
Jan 14, 2013
21,902
20,198
136
I know I'm probably going to sound like an asshole here - but I've kinda centered on and have realized that that many suicides are due in part to an attention whoring personality that goes too far. It's never enough. They can never fully fill that void.

Perfect examples are celebrities in general - Robin Williams, Linkin Park singer (Chester), list goes on and on. What could they possibly have in life that is depressing? You could literally BUY anything to solve any potential problems. It really just sounds like an endless void of attention seeking that they can never fully fill.

To me - it honestly makes perfect sense with people who choose to change genders. It's not about society not "accepting" them IMO - it's just attention seeking. Mr. Jenner is (yet another) perfect example. It wasn't for any reason other than attention. Connect that with the suicide rate in third world countries being microscopic compared to first world ones. It's almost as if people have too much shit to worry about instead of "how will I feed myself?".

you are like a shallow caveman dude. it's sad.
 

MrSquished

Lifer
Jan 14, 2013
21,902
20,198
136
The caveman has infinite depth compared to the typical materialistic American of today

He's the one saying you could buy yourself out of any kind of sadness as a materialistic American, not me, so I don't know what you are on about.

he is a shallow caveman, i'll stick by that analysis.
 

Noah Abrams

Golden Member
Feb 15, 2018
1,041
109
76
He's the one saying you could buy yourself out of any kind of sadness as a materialistic American, not me, so I don't know what you are on about.

he is a shallow caveman, i'll stick by that analysis.

I was agreeing with you. But you are being harsh on the caveman. As I said the typical materialistic American these days is not like caveman who only wants his immediate needs met. The greed of our society is infinite
 

paperfist

Diamond Member
Nov 30, 2000
6,517
280
126
www.the-teh.com
They don’t. They see death as a solution to problems or thoughts that you have never experienced. Most people can’t relate to that reality.

I wonder what problems are so great that you have to pull your own plug before the lights were scheduled to go out?

I believe the majority of people want to live longer than they get to no matter what demons they may face...
 

DisarmedDespot

Senior member
Jun 2, 2016
589
588
136
I wonder what problems are so great that you have to pull your own plug before the lights were scheduled to go out?

I believe the majority of people want to live longer than they get to no matter what demons they may face...
Like others have said, it's not something rational. It's an emotional response to an intrusive, overwhelming feeling of despair. I've never been depressed, but I've dealt with some anxiety attacks. They come without warning or reason and, before I learned to manage them, were damn near overwhelming at times. Mind you, this was during a good period of my life. I was about to graduate college and start a really good job the next week, was in good health and had a supportive family. Despite all of that, the attacks could hit me at any time, sometimes even mid-conversation with people. I've nothing but sympathy for people with chronic depression.
 
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paperfist

Diamond Member
Nov 30, 2000
6,517
280
126
www.the-teh.com
Like others have said, it's not something rational. It's an emotional response to an intrusive, overwhelming feeling of despair. I've never been depressed, but I've dealt with some anxiety attacks. They come without warning or reason and, before I learned to manage them, were damn near overwhelming at times. Mind you, this was during a good period of my life. I was about to graduate college and start a really good job the next week, was in good health and had a supportive family. Despite all of that, the attacks could hit me at any time, sometimes even mid-conversation with people. I've nothing but sympathy for people with chronic depression.

My gf has depression and anxiety so I can understand what you're saying and how crushing it is especially when it comes out of no where and instantly interrupts your well being.

I don't think she's suicidal, though I don't know what exactly triggers the want to end it all.
 

Thebobo

Lifer
Jun 19, 2006
18,592
7,673
136
this is correct and also lack of faith in god. Having faith makes you not want to commit suicide. I will not debate the existence of god.

Do you have any scientific proof for you claim? Or like your faith you just assume it true because you want it to?
 

13Gigatons

Diamond Member
Apr 19, 2005
7,461
500
126
Mankind is a speck of dust
on an ocean of time and space
the fact that life is so persistent
is a miracle in itself.
 

Red Squirrel

No Lifer
May 24, 2003
67,895
12,365
126
www.anyf.ca
No amount of money or possessions can cure mental illness. I have all the major monetary/material items I ever dreamed of such as property, car, computers etc. Of course human nature is to always want more, but I can say that I've achieved my childhood goal and I'm in a really good place in life. And of course I have a good loving family and I'm in good terms with them. I feel sad for those who have issues with their family as that has to be hard. Yet with all the positives in my life, I ended up getting depression a few months back. When you're in that state of mind anything you have and all the good things in your life don't matter. It's a really messed up state of mind. I never really fully understood it myself until going through it. The part I find the worse is the lack of motivation. I didn't even want to watch TV. I didn't want to get up in the morning, I just didn't want to do anything. I didn't even want to live. Suicidal thoughts came to mind, but I knew that was not actually the answer, I needed to seek help and I did. Thankfully I managed to get out of it. At first I wanted to avoid meds, but ended up going on them anyway after a while since I was up and down. Now I'm working on weaning myself off. I feel great now and feel confident that I'll be able to get off, but I have to be careful especially in winter. Need to be more active and get more daylight. We don't really get much daylight here most of the year, especially if you don't get up early. It would be dark by the time I get up so I'd go weeks without seeing sunlight. That messes with your brain eventually. I'm getting older now so it just took a toll and I didn't realize it. Right now we're at the peak of daylight. Just got back from camp fire at my parent's and sun was still setting and it's like 11pm. It's kinda surreal. But this is short lived, in a few weeks it will start to get dark early again. By September/October it's back to never seeing daylight on work days.

As a side note my faith in God did help me get through this. Also saw a counselor who is the pastor at the pentecostal church and he's helped me a lot too. Though TBH, during the really dark stages of depression you start to question your faith, but the fact that I didn't actually want to commit suicide indicates to me that deep down, the faith was still there.
 
Reactions: paperfist
Nov 8, 2012
20,828
4,777
146
No amount of money or possessions can cure mental illness. I have all the major monetary/material items I ever dreamed of such as property, car, computers etc. Of course human nature is to always want more, but I can say that I've achieved my childhood goal and I'm in a really good place in life.

Question to you guys that have experienced and are describing for us what it's like to suffer from major depression.

Would you say that your depression or mental illnesses would change if tomorrow you wake up and are all of a sudden in an entirely different situation. Few examples - but certainly not limited to these:
1) You wake up and are a soldier that is deployed - you are in a platoon with your close friends you've made over the months of being forced to be together.
2) You wake up and are in the middle of a random nation (middle-east, India, China, Europe even). You have jack shit for money.
3) You wake up on a tropical island you own as a successful businessman - but a very busy one - with a banging hot 10/10 wife and multiple kids.

I'm just genuinely curious how a depressed mind acts when all of the things that previously messed with their brain chemicals are instantly replaced with questions like "Oh shit, how will I eat?". Not insinuating it will, just opening a discussion. As someone that has had my own neurological issues - I can definitely say when you change a situation - my brain certainly doesn't act the same as it once did.
 
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