Her first obligation is to you, her second to the children. Anything that negatively impacts her relationships with you and them shouldn't be an option.
Her third obligation is to protect the financial integrity of the family. If she can hang with her current job for a couple of years, get that old debt paid off and some serious money accrued to cover her schooling, that might be a good time to re-evaluation the situation.
But moving away from her husband and kids for two years should never be seriously considered.
Choices have consequences, and she should honor the ones she's already made.
Who are you and what have you done with our six????
Nothing new here. When I post about the OP's obligations to his SO, I'm the devil incarnate. But when I post about the obligations of the SO towards the OP, pigs are flying.
This plan is going to put too much of a strain on your family.
Putting up with less than ideal conditions at work for the benefit of the family is something I think every bread winner deals with. And because you guys have a family with little kids, she needs to chalk this up as a sacrifice for her family and being there for her kids.
Possibility, absolutely. Upshot is that where we are is a "good" program but not a desireable one. It's no where near a competive program where your qualified/desirable applicants far outweigh the available positions.
Do parents or family live nearby to help with the kids? It seems like it could get rough with her in med school then residency, and you juggling work + kids + house (cooking, cleaning, shopping). Who gets the kid when sick, hurt, school emergency, soccer practice, etc.? Just sounds rough to deal with that for years without another person around.
Yep. My parents are a 5 minute walk from our house. My Mom is retired and does do a lot of emergency babysitting for us right now.
What I can't fully figure out is the cost benefit of this.
Wow! Just did some quick math on one of those 401k calculators and it looks like cashing out $120k and starting over 10 years down the road is a net loss of almost $1.2 mil.
My brain says costs and risk are way too high.
My heart says it's her dream job and she should go for it. After all, it's probably fewer years to your birth than it is to retirement at age 65.
Wow! Just did some quick math on one of those 401k calculators and it looks like cashing out $120k and starting over 10 years down the road is a net loss of almost $1.2 mil. My brain says costs and risk are way too high.
These are generally my thoughts, although a little more diplomacy should obviously be exercised.So she's working a cushy, well-paid job with decent hours, doing something that she likes and is good at, at a place where she is very respected by her coworkers and still has plenty of time for her family, in exchange for working HELLISH hours for years on end, never seeing her kids or you, having little choice on where or when she works, and going into massive debt on top of it? Plus, something tells me that the "dream" would fade once she actually started living it.
Oh, she doesn't like her managers? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called "EVERYBODY," and they meet at the bar.
she doesn't like her managers? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called "EVERYBODY," and they meet at the bar.
Oh, she doesn't like her managers? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called "EVERYBODY," and they meet at the bar.
Oh, she doesn't like her managers? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called "EVERYBODY," and they meet at the bar.
Oh, she doesn't like her managers? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called "EVERYBODY," and they meet at the bar.