Would I be too much of a jerk if I...

[VirtualLarry]

Asked for a security deposit, equal to the cost of the laptop, for loaning a laptop to my friend's girl to use while she's in the hospital? (Frankly, I'm more worried about it getting stolen than dropped or damaged.)

I still don't know why he asked me to provide a laptop, rather than just use her phone for Facebook. (At least, he has a smartphone, I don't know about her.)

Back in the day, I loaned him a few video games that I never got back. He once claimed that his ferret scratched one of them up. I suspected he took it and traded it in for a new game without telling me or paying me back for it. I never actually saw the disc again.

 

[BoomerD]

Hell no. Either charge him a "deposit," or just decline.

 

[Printer Bandit]

that's a lil dicky

 

[mmntech]

I have a personal policy that I don't lend anything valuable to anyone unless they're an immediate family member or I can supervise them. Even with family I supervise them, as my dad has broken quite a few of my things over the years. Does your friend not have a laptop he can loan her? Just tell him you need the laptop for something.

 

[TallBill]

Yes. You're either comfortable loaning it or youre not.

 

[tcG]

IMO, asking for a deposit from a friend is out of the question. Whether you lend comes down to whether or not you trust your friend, and, like you said, the likelihood of losing the laptop due to circumstances out of your and your friend's control.

Asking for a deposit from a friend is weird because the thought process behind asking for a deposit implies a lack of trust.

 

[Schfifty Five]

Just say you aren't comfortable w/ lending it to her. It does not make you any less of a friend and if he is your friend, he should understand.

 

[rga]

I let a friend borrow my Nintendo 64 with GoldenEye and a couple of other games for a few weeks after we'd been playing for a few hours after school one day. Eventually he moved, and I didn't see or hear from him for years. Then I saw him on a bus one day a few years back. I was so surprised that I didn't even bring up the N64, but I wish I had. Back then he didn't have anything I really wanted for collateral, but if I were to do it all over again, there's no way I'd be letting him borrow my N64 unless he gave me something in trade to take home.

 

[WHAMPOM]

Deposit and rent, make it cheaper to buy his own and loan it to his girl.

 

[gevorg]

What kind of a friend? If he is your very close friend, you'll be more than a dick, you'll be douchebag for not lending a laptop to him. Otherwise, make up any excuse you can think of.

 

[biostud]

Just say the possibility of catching a virus through the computer is too great a health risk.

 

[Craig234]

Tell him you're not comfortable after lending him things previously you didn't get back - you would like to help but don't want to risk losing your laptop.

Then he can provide you some sort of explicit assurances. You accept them and loan the laptop. If you're not comfortable doing that, you aren't acting as friends much.

And that might be ok - if you really don't trust him to return it, it's probably best to say that and that you're still friends but don't want to loan it out.

On the other hand, how much risk is there really? It's going to a hospital room. Wouldn't he have to be an outright thief for there to be a problem?

But agree in advance, if it gets stolen, he'll replace it.

 

[Tsavo]

If he has abused your friendship prior by not returning loaned items, decline his request by saying the laptop is_x.

x=broken
x=whatever

 

[Charlie98]

Yes. You're either comfortable loaning it or youre not.

No... You're either comfortable loaning it or you are not. If you are already asking you already have your answer.

I have friends I would hand my laptop over to in a heartbeat and not ask when they expect to return it... and I have people I know that I wouldn't.

 

[Via]

If losing something is a big deal then don't lend it out. Ever.

And never EVER lend out anything that has your personal info on it.

 

[VirtualLarry]

IMO, asking for a deposit from a friend is out of the question. Whether you lend comes down to whether or not you trust your friend, and, like you said, the likelihood of losing the laptop due to circumstances out of your and your friend's control.

Asking for a deposit from a friend is weird because the thought process behind asking for a deposit implies a lack of trust.

That's a good point. My fear is that the laptop will get stolen, and that I'll never get paid for it if that happens.

He used to borrow money left and right from people back in the day and never pay it back. I was a victim of that as well.

So, basically, I trust him as a friend, just not with money.

Plus, it wouldn't be him borrowing it, it would be his woman, and I really don't know her too well.

If it were just him borrowing it, and keeping it at his place, I would loan it to him no questions asked, no problem. But keeping it at the hospital for a few days, just to suit his woman's Facebook habit / addiction, well, that has me worried.

 

[Tsavo]

If it were just him borrowing it, and keeping it at his place, I would loan it to him no questions asked, no problem. But keeping it at the hospital for a few days, just to suit his woman's Facebook habit / addiction, well, that has me worried.

Yeah, little white lie time.

It's not worth the hassle, not to mention the real possibility of having to do a W&R on the device when it is returned to you.

 

[Craig234]

Suggest if he's a good boyfriend he should surprise her with a gift of a laptop.

It sounds like he might deserve a 'no' until he does better at repaying/returning things.

 

[KaOTiK]

I would never lend anything of mine to a person that didn't give back or replace a previous item I lent to them.

 

[VirtualLarry]

And that might be ok - if you really don't trust him to return it, it's probably best to say that and that you're still friends but don't want to loan it out.

On the other hand, how much risk is there really? It's going to a hospital room. Wouldn't he have to be an outright thief for there to be a problem?

I know that he wouldn't take it - I'm more worried about the hospital employees and other patient's visitors.

But agree in advance, if it gets stolen, he'll replace it.

But therein lies the rub - even if he agrees to that, I'll never see the money. He just doesn't care about paying people back. That's just the way he is. Hence the idea of the deposit.

Edit: Plus, a deposit would make him and his woman more motivated to keep an eye on it and take good care of it, than they might ordinarily would.

But I hear what your saying. If my other friend loaned me his PS3, his prized possession, you had better believe that I would know that if anything happened to it while I had it, I would pay for a replacement. I would think it kind of weird if he asked for a deposit.
I can just hear his woman saying "but it wasn't my fault" (if it got stolen).

Ok, would it be an equally dickish move to make him sign an agreement, stating that he will pay me the full price of the laptop, should it not be returned in the same condition as I loaned it to him. (Software excluded, I'll wipe it when it comes back.)

Edit: I could ask him to let me borrow his PS3 + games, and if he is unwilling to do that, then I am unwilling to loan him my laptop.

 

[BoomerD]

I know that he wouldn't take it - I'm more worried about the hospital employees and other patient's visitors.

But therein lies the rub - even if he agrees to that, I'll never see the money. He just doesn't care about paying people back. That's just the way he is. Hence the idea of the deposit.

Then your best bet might be to just say no.

 

[LumbergTech]

Why is she in the hospital would determine. Is she in for something horrible? That might tip the scales despite my better judgement. I don't see a problem with the PS3 as collateral.

 

[Zorander]

Lending the laptop definitely looks like a bad idea.

Either flat out reject or make up an excuse.

 

[coldmeat]

But therein lies the rub - even if he agrees to that, I'll never see the money. He just doesn't care about paying people back. That's just the way he is. Hence the idea of the deposit.

Why are you even considering this if the above is true?

How hard is it to just say you need it?

 

[lxskllr]

I'd just say no. There's friends, and there's business, and I don't like to mix them. Business deals are tacky, and inappropriate for deals between friends. He can't be trusted with stuff you can't afford to lose, so no computer.