Alright screw this.
Here is the situation:
(Will put YAGT on the subject when done typing this)
I was recently dumped by my partner of 4 1/2 years. The wanted to see other [people but still have me as their plan B or fall back plan. I said no and we broke up. This was approximately 2 months ago.
I started dating about 2weeks after this. I met someone that suits me and we have alot in common, like the same personality tendencies, same interests, and general preferences/views on life.
Fast forward to 3 weeks ago. My ex says they are hoping we could get back to gether. I tell him no i am not interested. A week goes by and he asks me if he has any chance of getting back together with me. I tell him, "We talked about this last weekend, my answer still has not changed." He cries and says he can't live without me. I roll my eyes and try to get this situation out of my life. Approximately 6 hours later he comes over to my apartment (we moved to seperate addresses after we broke up) in tears and begging me to let us get back to gether. I invite him in to sit down and talk. He says he made a mistake and was scared of getting so committed. I tell him what I tol him earlier "I am not interested, it is not going to happen." At this point I am getting very annoyed that the person that dumped me in the first place will not accept the fact that I am not willing to get back to gether with someone that, (to me atleast) does not know the value of commitment. Well at this point my ex insists he allow us to get back together. I reiterate what I said earlier, this time tho a little more insistant as I am losing my patience. At this point he gets up goes into my kitchen starts pulling out drawers and trashing my kitchen. I tell him to leave. He grabs a knife and tries to slash his wrists. I stop him, take the knife from him and drag him out of my apartment. Call the police to have him arrested and taken to a psych ward. At this point I am in tears and absolutely destroyed over the nights events.
Just so you know, what transpired between my ex and I on that night was drama to the 10th power from my perceptoin.
Well to cut it short, remember the new person I started dating that I mentioned earlier. Well I called them, as we had made tentative plans to get together that night, I tell him that my ex tried to kill himself in my apartment and that I don't think we will be able to get together that night. I apologize and try to cool off. Well he goes off on business trips for the next 2 weeks and we dont see each other all that time. When he gets back he is very distant with me. At present our relationship is nothing like what it was.
I am no longer speaking to my ex and despise him for what he has done to my life and my apartment. Now I am worried that I lost out on dating someone that I could have really worked out well with and am wondering what I sihould do.
I have already talked to him about what happened, and he said he just thought my ex and I needed to get back together. Which doesn't make sense to me. He says he is not going anywhere but he is still very physically distant and non talkative towards me.
I feel like I made a mistake by calling him and telling him what had transpired between me and my ex that night.
Any suggestions? I have thought about asking him where we stand and if he is still interested in dating but I am scared because I don't want to keep pressing the issue.
Extra Credit Questions:
What do you define as drama?
Do you think a relationship can exist without drama?
How do you define drama? What qualities in a relationship cause it to be a drama filled relationship?
Here is the situation:
(Will put YAGT on the subject when done typing this)
I was recently dumped by my partner of 4 1/2 years. The wanted to see other [people but still have me as their plan B or fall back plan. I said no and we broke up. This was approximately 2 months ago.
I started dating about 2weeks after this. I met someone that suits me and we have alot in common, like the same personality tendencies, same interests, and general preferences/views on life.
Fast forward to 3 weeks ago. My ex says they are hoping we could get back to gether. I tell him no i am not interested. A week goes by and he asks me if he has any chance of getting back together with me. I tell him, "We talked about this last weekend, my answer still has not changed." He cries and says he can't live without me. I roll my eyes and try to get this situation out of my life. Approximately 6 hours later he comes over to my apartment (we moved to seperate addresses after we broke up) in tears and begging me to let us get back to gether. I invite him in to sit down and talk. He says he made a mistake and was scared of getting so committed. I tell him what I tol him earlier "I am not interested, it is not going to happen." At this point I am getting very annoyed that the person that dumped me in the first place will not accept the fact that I am not willing to get back to gether with someone that, (to me atleast) does not know the value of commitment. Well at this point my ex insists he allow us to get back together. I reiterate what I said earlier, this time tho a little more insistant as I am losing my patience. At this point he gets up goes into my kitchen starts pulling out drawers and trashing my kitchen. I tell him to leave. He grabs a knife and tries to slash his wrists. I stop him, take the knife from him and drag him out of my apartment. Call the police to have him arrested and taken to a psych ward. At this point I am in tears and absolutely destroyed over the nights events.
Just so you know, what transpired between my ex and I on that night was drama to the 10th power from my perceptoin.
Well to cut it short, remember the new person I started dating that I mentioned earlier. Well I called them, as we had made tentative plans to get together that night, I tell him that my ex tried to kill himself in my apartment and that I don't think we will be able to get together that night. I apologize and try to cool off. Well he goes off on business trips for the next 2 weeks and we dont see each other all that time. When he gets back he is very distant with me. At present our relationship is nothing like what it was.
I am no longer speaking to my ex and despise him for what he has done to my life and my apartment. Now I am worried that I lost out on dating someone that I could have really worked out well with and am wondering what I sihould do.
I have already talked to him about what happened, and he said he just thought my ex and I needed to get back together. Which doesn't make sense to me. He says he is not going anywhere but he is still very physically distant and non talkative towards me.
I feel like I made a mistake by calling him and telling him what had transpired between me and my ex that night.
Any suggestions? I have thought about asking him where we stand and if he is still interested in dating but I am scared because I don't want to keep pressing the issue.
Extra Credit Questions:
What do you define as drama?
Do you think a relationship can exist without drama?
How do you define drama? What qualities in a relationship cause it to be a drama filled relationship?