Background: My girlfriend and I had been going out for a year and a half when she decided to take a break. She decides to take a break and cuts all communication for three days straight. She says she is willing to talk to me when we initially go on this "break," saying she 'needs time away b/c we are fighting too much,' but talking to me consists of ten minutes conversations in the morning through AIM and then saying "ok, ttyl" and ttyl apparently means "ill talk to you tomorrow" . . . b/c that?s what happens. During the last year and a half each night she has called/texted/AIM'ed me concerning where I have been, how i have been doing, what time I am going to talk to her tomorrow....then, all of a sudden, she doesn't care. It's as if I was cut overnight, from my perspective.
Now in talking to my friends I realize this change did NOT, most likely, happen overnight. There was this other guy that she knew from two years ago that I think had interest in her but im not sure of. Anyway, two weeks before she took her break with me, I took a break from her b/c I needed to think about what I wanted to do in my life. What direction I wanted to follow in life and more personal questions that needed to be answered rather than relationship questions. So it was at that time, that she starts working out with this guy at the gym. It was b/c I took a break from her that she decided to "change her lifestyle." One of the things she wanted to change was her fitness level. . .so she went decided to work out every weekday with this guy when I was on a break with her. After the break we end up back together and she seems changed. I learned that she and this guy were supposed to work out together and I was naturally concerned that she would do this...her response was "we are just friends. I think of him like an older brother. You have NOTHING to worry about." I bring it up again later, her response "You have NOTHING to worry about. Even if, for SOME reason we ended up not together I wouldn't see myself with him." Two weeks pass and she takes a break from me...three days pass and then she breaks up with me.
We talk very little for the next 1.5 weeks and then I ask her if she wants to watch a some LOST. She says alright. So I bring over some beer and we watch LOST and such. During LOST she is texting like 4-5 times back and fourth so I ask her "who is that." She says "its my friend." I say "what's up with her?" she says "oh, she is having problems with her boyfriend. he doesnt like the new place she is living. he says she doesn?t give him as much time as she used to and that the bed she has to sleep on is too small." I say "alright" but think to myself "bull sh*t, its probably that other guy." We continue to watch LOST, she gets more texts...so I say "gezzzz, tell her to stop texting to you...." she responds with "she is having problems, ill tell her goodnight." I say "is it really your friend" she says "yea" i say "you are lying to me" she gets defensive and says "its her! you think im lying!!?" I just leave it at that. We watch some more. The beer eventually gets to her and she falls asleep.
As she is sleeping, i know this is kinda assy of me, but i go over and check who she is texting. It is to that other guy. He says stuff like "hey, hope you sleep well tonight." "can we wake up tomorrow early and get married?" "you are the only girl i ever want to kiss again" "I love you baby" (news to me they kissed. fu*kin kissed less than two weeks after she broke up with me. WTH. On top of that they say they LOVE each other. We were broken up less than two weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is it just me, or is that F'ed up???) And she responds with stuff like "i love you too baby" "hey text me when you get off work tomorrow" "can you come and pick me up from work tomorrow???" "I'm here watching this show and this guy lost his loved one...all i can think about is holding you and kissing you" (WTF. . .we were together for a year and a half and within less than two weeks she is on to the next guy!?)
I knew it. My thoughts were right. Her words of "he is like an older brother" "even if we were to break up for some reason, I would never see myself with him" ... they were all false.
So I put her phone down, picked up my stuff, and left.
She is Cut
Update:
I left her a note before I left the night of, basically saying:
-Hope you guys have a fruitful and wonderful relationship together
-I dont appreciate being lied to, I never treated you dishonestly
-Have a good life
She Texts me back today saying:
"I will have you know. I left you for no one except myself. The new guy is a new development. Believe what you want"
You know what I think: So what...if you guys decided to be together TODAY that would be too soon. Give yourself some F'ing time, like at least couple weeks, to recuperate. my god!
Update2 (12/12/06):
It's been a week since I posted all that stuff above. Still not talking to her and am not planning on it either. She texted me a couple of days ago when I was at the LA Auto show with a bunch of friends. It said: "hope your finals went well." I didn't respond, didn't even think twice about responding. . .but rather laughed inside a little bit thinking "you don't really care" and then put my phone back in my pocket and went back to enjoying cars and cuties alike. So that's where I'm at, I don't know what's going on in her life. Thanks for all the advice guys, much appreciated.
Now in talking to my friends I realize this change did NOT, most likely, happen overnight. There was this other guy that she knew from two years ago that I think had interest in her but im not sure of. Anyway, two weeks before she took her break with me, I took a break from her b/c I needed to think about what I wanted to do in my life. What direction I wanted to follow in life and more personal questions that needed to be answered rather than relationship questions. So it was at that time, that she starts working out with this guy at the gym. It was b/c I took a break from her that she decided to "change her lifestyle." One of the things she wanted to change was her fitness level. . .so she went decided to work out every weekday with this guy when I was on a break with her. After the break we end up back together and she seems changed. I learned that she and this guy were supposed to work out together and I was naturally concerned that she would do this...her response was "we are just friends. I think of him like an older brother. You have NOTHING to worry about." I bring it up again later, her response "You have NOTHING to worry about. Even if, for SOME reason we ended up not together I wouldn't see myself with him." Two weeks pass and she takes a break from me...three days pass and then she breaks up with me.
We talk very little for the next 1.5 weeks and then I ask her if she wants to watch a some LOST. She says alright. So I bring over some beer and we watch LOST and such. During LOST she is texting like 4-5 times back and fourth so I ask her "who is that." She says "its my friend." I say "what's up with her?" she says "oh, she is having problems with her boyfriend. he doesnt like the new place she is living. he says she doesn?t give him as much time as she used to and that the bed she has to sleep on is too small." I say "alright" but think to myself "bull sh*t, its probably that other guy." We continue to watch LOST, she gets more texts...so I say "gezzzz, tell her to stop texting to you...." she responds with "she is having problems, ill tell her goodnight." I say "is it really your friend" she says "yea" i say "you are lying to me" she gets defensive and says "its her! you think im lying!!?" I just leave it at that. We watch some more. The beer eventually gets to her and she falls asleep.
As she is sleeping, i know this is kinda assy of me, but i go over and check who she is texting. It is to that other guy. He says stuff like "hey, hope you sleep well tonight." "can we wake up tomorrow early and get married?" "you are the only girl i ever want to kiss again" "I love you baby" (news to me they kissed. fu*kin kissed less than two weeks after she broke up with me. WTH. On top of that they say they LOVE each other. We were broken up less than two weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is it just me, or is that F'ed up???) And she responds with stuff like "i love you too baby" "hey text me when you get off work tomorrow" "can you come and pick me up from work tomorrow???" "I'm here watching this show and this guy lost his loved one...all i can think about is holding you and kissing you" (WTF. . .we were together for a year and a half and within less than two weeks she is on to the next guy!?)
I knew it. My thoughts were right. Her words of "he is like an older brother" "even if we were to break up for some reason, I would never see myself with him" ... they were all false.
So I put her phone down, picked up my stuff, and left.
She is Cut
Update:
I left her a note before I left the night of, basically saying:
-Hope you guys have a fruitful and wonderful relationship together
-I dont appreciate being lied to, I never treated you dishonestly
-Have a good life
She Texts me back today saying:
"I will have you know. I left you for no one except myself. The new guy is a new development. Believe what you want"
You know what I think: So what...if you guys decided to be together TODAY that would be too soon. Give yourself some F'ing time, like at least couple weeks, to recuperate. my god!
Update2 (12/12/06):
It's been a week since I posted all that stuff above. Still not talking to her and am not planning on it either. She texted me a couple of days ago when I was at the LA Auto show with a bunch of friends. It said: "hope your finals went well." I didn't respond, didn't even think twice about responding. . .but rather laughed inside a little bit thinking "you don't really care" and then put my phone back in my pocket and went back to enjoying cars and cuties alike. So that's where I'm at, I don't know what's going on in her life. Thanks for all the advice guys, much appreciated.