Originally posted by: her209
Sounds like the typical cheater talk. "Don't blame me, I'm the victim here. *tear*" Maybe they should learn what the word commitment means. And if they break it, don't be suprised if you ass gets tossed out to the curb.Originally posted by: eits
love is subjective. you people think that just because YOU wouldn't cheat or would only cheat if you didn't really love who you with that that MUST be the ONLY way love must manifest itself... that's not the case. love is felt differently by everyone and shown differently by everyone. people have bad judgment at times, especially at certain moments of weakness... should you blame them? absolutely. but does that mean automatically that they still don't love you? NO.
lust is a very powerful thing, as is love... if you think that you could never tempted and potentially go astray by someone else while you love someone else, you're either immature and still living in a fantasy world of disney movies or you're too busy watching romantic comedies.
Speaking as a "victim" of cheating (evidenced in the post just above yours), her209, I am very familiar with the word and meaning of the term commitment.
Commitment is not conditional love, i.e. if you do something wrong or fail to meet a set of standards, you immediately lose it/the love is revoked. Commitment is not immediately "tossing your partner's ass to the curb" if they do something wrong (as always, there are varying degrees of wrong - for example, serious physical/emotional/sexual abuse in a relationship might merit a "tossing of an ass to a curb").
In my opinion, commitment is staying with your partner during both the good times and the bad times, through each other's times of strength and through times of weakness, and learning how to truly love (unconditionally), accept, support, and, if necessary and if possible, forgive.
It will take work. Relationships take work, commitment takes work. Instead of running away at the first sign of a problem, my husband and I chose to grit our teeth and work through it. It was a painful process, but in the end, it was worth it. We are very happy now, and I think we have an even deeper understanding of our love and commitment to each other several years later.