As stated, I never thought I'd be in a position where I need advice this badly, but neither me, nor any of my friends can seem to tackle this issue...
First a bit of background:
So, just shy of two weeks ago, I met this girl in one of my classes. To give you an idea, I had been in this class all semester, not knowing anybody...but after seeing just how boring it really is, I decided I needed to at least meet someone that I could talk with in class and make it a little more bearable So, I went ahead and met a few people, neither of whom seemed to be all that interesting...or willing to talk for that matter. Few days went by, and then I noticed someone in my class that I could only describe as "down to earth"-looking...if that makes any sense?
Anyways, I am super shy, and was never able to muster up the courage to start a conversation in/after class, so I ended up shooting her an email about class or whatever, told her to IM me if she wants, that kinda thing (quite lame indeed, I hope one day I'm not such a pu$$y). Anyways, she IMs me back, and we started talking.
Right away it seemed to go quite well. We talked about anything and everything, and our personalities, as I could tell, seemed to click very well. So, the next day we have class, we sit together, and then talk afterwards. My god, talking in person was even better...our personalties play off each other's so well, I was truly in shock, I didn't think this kind of person existed Also, we had talked a lot about music (my main interest) the night before, and I told her that I'd burn her a DVD of music she had to listen to, which she was really excited about. I gave it to her after class, and she seemed to really appreciate it. (she then mentioned loving many of the bands i introduced her to via that DVD)
That night we ended up hanging out at her place, watching a movie and playing some Wii (yeah....). I had a good time and made sure to tell her that. Fast forward to that weekend, we went out for coffee and then she came over to meet my friends and what not. I ended up having her come over on the one day this whole semester there was actually "partying" going on....may have been a bad idea, not quite sure. Lots of partying going on by my friends, but she said she had a good time regardless. I decided to walk her home, just because it was a long walk, and I wouldn't be able to deal with myself if I ever let someone walk home alone and something happened to them.
Fast forward to now......talk about on and off....I cannot, for the life of me, figure this one out. There are some days where we have super long conversations about stuff like relationships (past ones, what we are after, etc.) and then some days where I hardly get a word out of her. On top of that, every offer to do something with her outside of class seems to either be shot down or ignored. Many people have told me that perhaps I am moving too fast for her, which I suppose could be the case. The only thing that makes me wonder is why she was so willing to do things together when we first met rather than now....I cannot think of what might have "gone wrong" that would make her change her mind like that.
And you may be saying that I am asking too much from her....I dunno, I suppose that could be true. All the offers I've made recently involve doing things with other people, because I wanted to make it clear that I am not just after one thing (what most guys are after )....I really just like the time we do spend together.
So yeah, I suppose that is where things stand right now. I am really, really unsure why things have seemed to head south so damn quickly...I really don't think that I've done anything *wrong*. I think that the friendship I offer to people that don't know me may be a bit much perhaps....I try to go all out for my best friends, as I feel it is important to give to people you care about.
I will be honest and say that I truly had no intentions of something like this happening when I first started talking to her...I was really just looking for someone to chat with in class. It just so happened that our personalities complimented each other well...at least, I thought they did =/
A lot of people are telling me to just shut up and let her make the next move...which is probably the best advice I've heard...I'm just really bad at not talking, if that makes any sense. I just get the feeling that if I did "push too hard" or whatever, that I don't think that'll ever happen. I'm not sure if I've gotten to the point where I need to try and explain my way better to her, so she doesn't think that I am just after something serious with her or something. This has really been confusing the hell out of me the past few days, and I wish it didn't have to be so complicated.
Alright ATOT women experts.....do your worst! (I appreciate anyone that actually reads that book of a post I just wrote....like I said, once I start talking, it's hard to shut me up )
First a bit of background:
So, just shy of two weeks ago, I met this girl in one of my classes. To give you an idea, I had been in this class all semester, not knowing anybody...but after seeing just how boring it really is, I decided I needed to at least meet someone that I could talk with in class and make it a little more bearable So, I went ahead and met a few people, neither of whom seemed to be all that interesting...or willing to talk for that matter. Few days went by, and then I noticed someone in my class that I could only describe as "down to earth"-looking...if that makes any sense?
Anyways, I am super shy, and was never able to muster up the courage to start a conversation in/after class, so I ended up shooting her an email about class or whatever, told her to IM me if she wants, that kinda thing (quite lame indeed, I hope one day I'm not such a pu$$y). Anyways, she IMs me back, and we started talking.
Right away it seemed to go quite well. We talked about anything and everything, and our personalities, as I could tell, seemed to click very well. So, the next day we have class, we sit together, and then talk afterwards. My god, talking in person was even better...our personalties play off each other's so well, I was truly in shock, I didn't think this kind of person existed Also, we had talked a lot about music (my main interest) the night before, and I told her that I'd burn her a DVD of music she had to listen to, which she was really excited about. I gave it to her after class, and she seemed to really appreciate it. (she then mentioned loving many of the bands i introduced her to via that DVD)
That night we ended up hanging out at her place, watching a movie and playing some Wii (yeah....). I had a good time and made sure to tell her that. Fast forward to that weekend, we went out for coffee and then she came over to meet my friends and what not. I ended up having her come over on the one day this whole semester there was actually "partying" going on....may have been a bad idea, not quite sure. Lots of partying going on by my friends, but she said she had a good time regardless. I decided to walk her home, just because it was a long walk, and I wouldn't be able to deal with myself if I ever let someone walk home alone and something happened to them.
Fast forward to now......talk about on and off....I cannot, for the life of me, figure this one out. There are some days where we have super long conversations about stuff like relationships (past ones, what we are after, etc.) and then some days where I hardly get a word out of her. On top of that, every offer to do something with her outside of class seems to either be shot down or ignored. Many people have told me that perhaps I am moving too fast for her, which I suppose could be the case. The only thing that makes me wonder is why she was so willing to do things together when we first met rather than now....I cannot think of what might have "gone wrong" that would make her change her mind like that.
And you may be saying that I am asking too much from her....I dunno, I suppose that could be true. All the offers I've made recently involve doing things with other people, because I wanted to make it clear that I am not just after one thing (what most guys are after )....I really just like the time we do spend together.
So yeah, I suppose that is where things stand right now. I am really, really unsure why things have seemed to head south so damn quickly...I really don't think that I've done anything *wrong*. I think that the friendship I offer to people that don't know me may be a bit much perhaps....I try to go all out for my best friends, as I feel it is important to give to people you care about.
I will be honest and say that I truly had no intentions of something like this happening when I first started talking to her...I was really just looking for someone to chat with in class. It just so happened that our personalities complimented each other well...at least, I thought they did =/
A lot of people are telling me to just shut up and let her make the next move...which is probably the best advice I've heard...I'm just really bad at not talking, if that makes any sense. I just get the feeling that if I did "push too hard" or whatever, that I don't think that'll ever happen. I'm not sure if I've gotten to the point where I need to try and explain my way better to her, so she doesn't think that I am just after something serious with her or something. This has really been confusing the hell out of me the past few days, and I wish it didn't have to be so complicated.
Alright ATOT women experts.....do your worst! (I appreciate anyone that actually reads that book of a post I just wrote....like I said, once I start talking, it's hard to shut me up )