you kids wanna get high?

Goosemaster

Lifer
Apr 10, 2001
48,775
3
81
some funny ones
"y first time was with 4 other hardcore smokers, it was a hell of an experience. We started smoking bowls and throughout the whole smoking period it felt like every single cell on my skin was being tickled by some anemones from the sea, it felt awsome. Then as I left and wandered the house, that's when I freaked out, I guess I pulled hard and some of the weed actually went and touched my throat because it turned numb. By this time I'm ****** crying and hunched in the corner of the bathroom thinking this numbness is going to spread and make me paralyzed ( I know I'm retarded, but it was my first time) I start to drink some water from the sink and since I couldn't feel my throat I couldn't swallow the dam water. So here I am tying not to drown, and thinking "dude your stupid for trying this ******, now your going to die, good ****** en job!" But then I went into my room and watched Law and Order like I've never done before, its so good when your high."

This happened to me the first time I smoked out of a bong. Noone explained to me how to do it and I just did what I thought I was supposed to do and took two MASSIVE hits, one after the other. I got really scared, and started shaking uncontrollably. I was sititng by the door, which was opening and closing a lot so the cold weather probably had a lot to do with it. My vision got really blured/stretched at the edges and I was convinced that I was going to die. At first, I thought it might have been laced with salvia or something, but my friends seemed fine. I ask them if what was happening to me was normal (by this point, I was delusional) and what was going on, shaking the whole time. By then, my friends were pretty worried and after a lot of pleading from me, I convinced one of my friends to drop me off in front of the emergency room. He did, but I guess it wasn't the ER because wherever he dropped me off (I don't remember much from this point), the door was locked. I wondered around and eventually found myself in the ER waiting room. All I remember was flopping down in a waiting chair and blacking in and out of being awake. I remember talking to someone, about the time, but don't remember what he or I said. Eventually, I completly pass out, wake up after an hour or so (by now, almost three hours have passed since I took the hits) and I felt A LOT better, so I walk back to my dorm and pass out. Felt kinda ****** the next day but it passed. Swore I wouldn't smoke again for a really long time, but that wasn't true
 

beer

Lifer
Jun 27, 2000
11,169
1
0
Wow, their friends' must've sucked for not instructing them on the ways of the Bong. They're not simple devices to the uninitiated. That's too bad they had poor first experiences. Mine were good....hopefully it won't scar them for too long.
 

zylander

Platinum Member
Aug 25, 2002
2,501
0
76
"swore I wouldnt smoke again for a really long time, but that wasnt true."

haha, hillarious.
 

irishScott

Lifer
Oct 10, 2006
21,562
3
0
:music:

(It's like I dont care about nothing man.....
roll another blunt)All yea! wwwwwoooohhhhh !!!! Yea! Yea! Yea!

I was gonna clean my room until I got high
I was gonna get up and find the broom but then I got high
My room is still messed up and I know why (Why man?)
- because I got high (repeat 3X)

I was gonna go to class before I got high
I coulda cheated and I coulda passed but I got high
I am taking it next semester and I know why (Why man?)
- because I got high (repeat 3X)

(Go to the next one, Go to the next one, Go to the next one)

I was gonna go to work but then I got high
I just got a new promotion but I got high
Now I'm selling dope and I know why (Why man?)
- because I got high (repeat 3X)

I was gonna go to court before I got high
I was gonna pay my child support but then I got high
They took my whole paycheck and I know why (Why man?)
- because I got high (repeat 3X)

I wasnt gonna run from the cops but I was high
I was gonna pull right over and stop but I was high
Now I am a paraplegic and I know why (Why man?)
- because I got high (repeat 3X)

I was gonna pay my car note until I got high
I wasn't gonna gamble on the boat but then I got high
now the tow truck is pulling away and I know why (Why man?)
- because I got high (repeat 3X)

I was gonna make love to you but then I got high
I was gonna eat yo pussy too but then I got high
now I'm jacking off and I know why (turn that ****** off)
- because I got high (repeat 3X)
(back round go go 10 times)
I messed up my entire life because I got high
I lost my kids and wife because I got high
Now I'm sleeping on the sidewalk and I know why (Why man?)
- because I got high (repeat 3X)

I'm gonna stop singing this song because I'm high
I'm singing this whole thing wrong because I'm high
And if I dont sell one copy I know why (Why man?)
- cause I'm high (repeat 3X)

(People in the background talking and laughing)

Cause I'm high (repeat 3X)

Well my name is afroman and im from east palm dale
(east palm dale)
And all the damn weed i be smokin is bomb as hell
I dont belive in Hitler thats what i say
(oh my goodness)
So all of u skins
(skins?)
Please give me more head
(bugaaaaaak)
Afro- Mother ****** m-a-n(m-a-n)
a-e-i-o-u (a e i o u)and some times w
We ain't gonna sell no more mother ****** albums cuz, let's go back to marshall durben and hang some more chickens cuz - ****** it!
****** THE CORPORATE WORLD (BIOTCH)
:music:
 

HombrePequeno

Diamond Member
Mar 7, 2001
4,657
0
0
My first experience with a bong sucked too. My friends made a six chambered bong (dubbed The Revolver) that you had to hit ridiculously hard to get anything out of. Afterwards I felt like I was peeing myself. I got up like every five minutes to make sure I wasn't.
 

Jules

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
15,213
0
0
Originally posted by: HombrePequeno
My first experience with a bong sucked too. My friends made a six chambered bong (dubbed The Revolver) that you had to hit ridiculously hard to get anything out of. Afterwards I felt like I was peeing myself. I got up like every five minutes to make sure I wasn't.

woah really? sometimes i have the problem when i feel like im peeing but im not. i also had problems when my throat would feel like its swelling up and some other ******. THat crap didnt happen untill my 3rd years of smoking.
 

pontifex

Lifer
Dec 5, 2000
43,804
46
91
how the hell did they get so fvcked up after one or 2 hits?

it doesn't affect you that soon or fast or even that much.

i'm thinking they're embellishing the stories or just outright lying.
 
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