You only get one shot at life...

[Patt]

I read the article, and I enjoyed it. As a married dude with 2 kids, (3, 1) I can't relate to that guy. I love family, I love family gatherings and can't imagine being the loner without a family. Yes I would have more freedom, yes I would DEFINITELY have more money, but I believe I stand to gain much much more by following the path that I have. Are there days I wish I was single and free? Yes, it is called every day ... but that feeling passes, and I have come to realize that there is no pricetag, freedom, dollars or otherwise that will permanently make me change my mind.

 

[JEDI]

love the last part:

"One of the hardest things to look at in this life is the lives we didn?t lead, the path not taken, potential left unfulfilled. In stories, those who look back ? Lot?s wife, Orpheus and Eurydice ? are lost. Looking to the side instead, to gauge how our companions are faring, is a way of glancing at a safer reflection of what we cannot directly bear, like Perseus seeing the Gorgon safely mirrored in his shield."

fvck regret. look towards the future, not wishing for a different past

 

[CRXican]

great article, easier to read if you click on the link

 

[kinev]

marked for later reading

 

[nutxo]

I got a scratch on my arm that healed oddly...

 

[SandEagle]

Originally posted by: MrsBugi
It's long but it's worth the read. :wine:

thats what she said

and

dr; tl

 

[Regs]

Originally posted by: Patt
I read the article, and I enjoyed it. As a married dude with 2 kids, (3, 1) I can't relate to that guy. I love family, I love family gatherings and can't imagine being the loner without a family. Yes I would have more freedom, yes I would DEFINITELY have more money, but I believe I stand to gain much much more by following the path that I have. Are there days I wish I was single and free? Yes, it is called every day ... but that feeling passes, and I have come to realize that there is no pricetag, freedom, dollars or otherwise that will permanently make me change my mind.

Humans are naturally social beings. Social isolation makes us miserable. Sure, we complain about all the hardships and heart break, but it's sadly what we live for. Life is something we have to deal with and not ignore.

 

[Geekbabe]

ROTFLOL over the " small, rude, incontinent person follow me around screaming and making me buy them stuff for the rest of my life"

I'm a parent but that cracked me up

 

[Aharami]

i didnt read the essay (will later), but no, Im not happy with the way my life has turned out. I want to be much more successful in my career than where I am today.

and I should be making a lot more than what I do now.

 

[Jeff7]

Cliffs:
- Time is linear, and moves in one direction. For now.
- You only go through once, and it's fairly brief. Again, for now.
- Decisions affect the future. Duh.


- You can't experience everything, so just appreciate what you do have, or you'll waste your life feeling regret over "missing" things you couldn't possibly have had time to do.

Spend your life trying to live the lives of everyone else, and there won't be time for your own life.

 

[manowar821]

Says you.

Oh, and who's to say that I wont succeed in my plan to live forever?

 

[PrelateBishop]

great read...thanks for sharing

 

[lyssword]

Originally posted by: Razgriz
tl;dr

 

[Triumph]

Originally posted by: blackdogdeek

Originally posted by: LumbergTech

Originally posted by: blackdogdeek

Originally posted by: LumbergTech
I know he complained about it in the article, but I just think that there is something wrong with people who don't like children. They seem to not understand that if people did not have children, we wouldn't be here. Basically every hobby, activity, job or whatever was created or done by someone else who had a mother and father. If you cannot love a child, you are not living. You cannot truly love yourself. I'm not saying everyone should have children. I'm also not saying that some people don't regret having them.

I think his mistake is to assume that doing x behavior automatically means that you can't do y behavior. You can have kids and travel. You can still be famous. (not for me personally) You don't have to spend every Saturday with your family. He might find that the quality of relationship that you can build up with family is much stronger than this weak bond that he speaks off that becomes obvious when old friends come together and don't understand each other anymore.

Overall a decent article, but I think the guy is a bit of a narcissist.

i didn't read anything about him not liking children. he did imply he didn't want to have children. but not liking and not wanting are vastly different.

Maybe I took it wrong, but he had very negative comments in my opinion.

For instance:

"Most of my married friends now have children, the rewards of which appear to be exclusively intangible and, like the mysteries of some gnostic sect, incommunicable to outsiders. In fact it seems from the outside as if these people have joined a dubious cult: they claim to be much happier and more fulfilled than ever before, even though they live in conditions of appalling filth and degradation, deprived of the most basic freedoms and dignity, and owe unquestioning obedience to a capricious and demented master. "

I think maybe this guy doesn't understand that sometimes the greatest rewards come with a price tag.

they are negative, but i think they are accurate. the rewards are completely intangible, and they are impossible to convey. i am deprived of many of the basic freedoms i once relished and am at the beck and call of a most demented master. two, in fact. however, without being able to comprehend the rewards, all he can comment on are the caveats. these are definitely concrete.

but it's really about what's important to you. despite the above, i would never, ever want a life without my girls. i wouldn't call him a narcissist. just a realist who doesn't know better.

By saying "doesn't know better" your presumption is that your choice in life IS the better choice. I think you missed the point of his essay, which is that you make that presumption specifically to make you feel better about your own choice.

 

[Oceandevi]

Ugh some hipster took forever to explain the "grass is greener" anecdote. How ...... amusing.

 

[Oceandevi]

Originally posted by: manowar821
Says you.

Oh, and who's to say that I wont succeed in my plan to live forever?

If I figure it out first we can trade secrets.

 

[SonicIce]

Originally posted by: Dirigible

Originally posted by: Razgriz
tl;dr

also:

YAMBT;dr

strange, googling that brings this thread as the first result

 

[nutxo]

Originally posted by: Triumph

Originally posted by: blackdogdeek

Originally posted by: LumbergTech

Originally posted by: blackdogdeek

Originally posted by: LumbergTech
I know he complained about it in the article, but I just think that there is something wrong with people who don't like children. They seem to not understand that if people did not have children, we wouldn't be here. Basically every hobby, activity, job or whatever was created or done by someone else who had a mother and father. If you cannot love a child, you are not living. You cannot truly love yourself. I'm not saying everyone should have children. I'm also not saying that some people don't regret having them.

I think his mistake is to assume that doing x behavior automatically means that you can't do y behavior. You can have kids and travel. You can still be famous. (not for me personally) You don't have to spend every Saturday with your family. He might find that the quality of relationship that you can build up with family is much stronger than this weak bond that he speaks off that becomes obvious when old friends come together and don't understand each other anymore.

Overall a decent article, but I think the guy is a bit of a narcissist.

i didn't read anything about him not liking children. he did imply he didn't want to have children. but not liking and not wanting are vastly different.

Maybe I took it wrong, but he had very negative comments in my opinion.

For instance:

"Most of my married friends now have children, the rewards of which appear to be exclusively intangible and, like the mysteries of some gnostic sect, incommunicable to outsiders. In fact it seems from the outside as if these people have joined a dubious cult: they claim to be much happier and more fulfilled than ever before, even though they live in conditions of appalling filth and degradation, deprived of the most basic freedoms and dignity, and owe unquestioning obedience to a capricious and demented master. "

I think maybe this guy doesn't understand that sometimes the greatest rewards come with a price tag.

they are negative, but i think they are accurate. the rewards are completely intangible, and they are impossible to convey. i am deprived of many of the basic freedoms i once relished and am at the beck and call of a most demented master. two, in fact. however, without being able to comprehend the rewards, all he can comment on are the caveats. these are definitely concrete.

but it's really about what's important to you. despite the above, i would never, ever want a life without my girls. i wouldn't call him a narcissist. just a realist who doesn't know better.

By saying "doesn't know better" your presumption is that your choice in life IS the better choice. I think you missed the point of his essay, which is that you make that presumption specifically to make you feel better about your own choice.

I think the author makes statements like that to make him feel better about the choices he made. I don't see any possible way the comment could be presented as positive at all.

 

[lokiju]

Originally posted by: HardcoreRobot
this is why its important to focus on the positive things in life, not the negative. there are advantages and disadvantages to everything, you can be perpetually satisfied or pissed off

Reminds me of the last episode of House.

Easy to forget the positive in life and latch onto the bad, but it's destructive and self defeating.

 

[SunnyD]

You get more than one shot at life. How many just depends on how many bullets you have.

 

[darkxshade]

If I only get one shot at life, I don't wanna waste it reading this long ass article.

 

[dguy6789]

Good read. I share many of the author's views.

 

[Via]

Best line in the Matrix trilogy was when Neo asked "What am I waiting for?" and the Oracle replies tiredly "I don't know. Your next life, maybe?"

That line went through me line a lightning bolt. I guess I was ready (or needed) to hear it.

Up to that point I hadn't done that much but brood, but the last 6-7 years I've filled with 15 years of work.

It doesn't matter where you get the message. It only matters that you do.

 

[lokiju]

Cliffs: To some, the grass always looks greener on the other side.

 

[DAPUNISHER]

Originally posted by: Atomic Playboy

Originally posted by: rgwalt
I hate heights and moving fast with little control over my actions. Hence, I detest skiing and rollercoasters. What brings joy to the skiier and the coaster junky puts terror into my heart... Much like the thought of having kids.

This statement is amusing when it is followed immediately by your sig: "I will face my fear. I will let it pass through me."

Ah, irony.

The Bene Gesserit litany against fear only works for Muadib.

AS response to the article, I will stay with the movie quote theme that started above-

"Sometimes you just gotta say, "What the fuck, make your move."